Gross.

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by DontTellSmokey, Feb 2, 2012.

  1. So, before I start this story, if you're going to get offended or pissed for me telling the truth, you might want to head back to the main forum page.

    This semester started about a month ago, and I met a stoner chick in my English class. Granted, she was a little broad shouldered, but she was decently cute. We got to talking, and she suggested the idea of being friends with benefits. Since I had never done that with a girl who smokes just as much weed as I do, I figured I'd give it a shot.

    Bad move.

    First off, she must have smoked at least three cigs on the way over, because her mouth straight tasted like an ashtray. I let this go, since I figured I could deal with it.

    Next, I again learned the lesson that boobs that look great in a bra, do not always look great outside. Any guy who has been with a girl with DD's, can attest to the fact that pancake nips are a total turn off.

    Third, her special spot smelled. Not good at all.

    I felt bad because midway through she asked if I liked what I saw, and I didn't say a word. She didn't seem to be offended by it, though.

    Now, since she sits next to me in English 101, and I'm more than likely going to be working with her after my interview today, I need to find a way to let her know that I'm not really tryna hook up anymore without hurting her feelings.

    Help Blades!

    tl;dr: Stoner chick was a lousy lay, and I need to let her down easily

    My bad if I offended anyone with my language, but I'm wayyyy wigged out right now. She just left about 15 mins ago and texted me telling me that we should do it again sometime. I have yet to respond.
     
  2. Bummmmmmmp. Don't leave a brother hangin' :(
     
  3. Just be like, "Sup, babe. I want you inside me."

    That should work. That, or she'll start poking things up your ass.
     
  4. Just move on to somehting else bro...tell the bitch your busy when she wants to fuck..avoid that shit..she'll get the hint

    still be nice and remain friends..you could say u got the hots for some chick and would like to be in a relationship with said chick so she'll have find another dick

    then repress the images of her dirty nipples etc.
     
  5. Just be honest and easy
     
  6. Tell her the she turned you gay, problem solved
     

  7. "Sorry, trick, you were so lousy I decided to swing for dicks. Deuces."

    I can't see anything going wrong with that. :cool:
     
  8. i dunno jest let her know you don't like the idea of friends with benefits say something like it ruins the friendship.
     
  9. Smelly snatch thats a big turn off, jus tell her u werent feelin it text that to her
     
  10. Just let her suck your dick and nothing else, problem solved...
     
  11. Tell her you have stds.
     
  12. [quote name='"Kaboose420"']Just let her suck your dick and nothing else, problem solved...[/quote]

    Actually, that's all it was supposed to be. But then it got gnarly.

    She wasn't even that great at blowing...
     
  13. Teach her,mold her into the clean, cute. girl she could be. Brainwash her.
    Have one of the local street gals give her some lessons on how to give head.
     
  14. [quote name='"growerBabe"']Teach her,mols her into the clean cute girl she could be.
    Have one of the local street gals give her some lessons on how to give head.[/quote]

    No amount of grooming I can supply can change those knockers. I get chills just thinking about it.
     
  15. Imagine when she turns 60 Swing................................
     
  16. This, or let her down whichever way will hurt her the least.

    Hell, she may not even give a fuck :laughing:
     
  17. Did you really expect a girl with huge tits have tiny little nipples? Because I, personally, would find that weirder than a chick with big tits and big nipples.

    I mean, how big were we talking though?
     
  18. Tell her you don't want to do the friends with benefits thing anymore, but still want to be friends. Unless you dont want to be friends.
     
  19. in a few days tell her that you're in the same situation with another girl, that girl gave you an ultimatum to be exclusive, and you took it.
     
  20. Tell her youre seeing someone else
    tell her you need some space right now b/c of school
    slowly detach
    be SUPER GROSS around her (dont shower, pick your nose, fart, Dont brush, talk about super gay shit, tell her youve always wondered what it would be like to fuck a cat)

    Good Luck!
     
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