Here's what I think regarding the practice of giving and recieving gifts. I don't like it. In fact, I hate it. I hate getting gifts, and I hate giving them. I never expect anyone to give me gifts, and I don't expect anyone to expect gifts from me. But except me, everyone expect to be given gifts on certain occassions, like their birthdays and anniversaries. And when they don't get it, they get angry. They say things like, "You didn't give me any gifts for my birthday." Well, you should have told me exactly what you want. Then I'll go and get it for you. Unless you don't tell me what you want, how am I supposed to know what you want? I'm not a mind reader... And no. You can't have anything expensive coz... I'm broke. -___-,,
Actually she did tell me what she wanted. But like I said, I was broke, and didn't want to admit that. So I didn't get anything for her birthday coz I couldn't afford to buy what she wanted anyway, so why bother? But then, if I had not been playing so much golf, then I'd have some money left to buy her the thing she wanted, so.... Hm... Can't wait till pay day...
I am with you man, can't stand the whole gift giving process. "ohh lets see how much you care about me based off this shit you bought" I don't like people giving me things either, if I wanted it I would get it myself. I don't want anyone wasting money on me for things I don't need/want. I've been trying to off my birthday since I was a wee teen, almost there.
I have actually fallen into this as well. i grew up poor. my birthdays and christmas were nothing special. and i didnt get many presents. but what i did get i really didnt want because my mind set was "why bother" people shouldn't base gifts with relationships as well. thought that counts not the material things. in my mind now.
Agreed. I'm actually a very good gift giver according to my gift recipients, but its such a silly convention. Okay, its my birthday, please give me superflous things I never had any intention of getting for myself. Oh, and now by social conventions, I have to get you something of equal or greater value on your birthday, that you had no intention of getting. My family was pretty well off, but we really didn't emphasize gift giving. Usually it would be something functional or something we could all share. Last year my birthday gift was a soup I like that our grocery store stopped carrying, no lie.
I always just buy something I expect the recipient to like. I never ask what they want for their birthday and they never tell me. If they like it fine, if not fuck it. Imagine you getting something on your birthday you didn't ask for, and you like it. That's much more fun than telling someone in advance what you want and getting it like the little spoiled fuck you are. Now imagine you getting something you don't like, with the receipt. Eh, you just tell the giver you like it (if you want to play nice) and return it. It's not like I ever got mad at getting something I didn't like or want, why the hell should somebody else?
This is exactly how i feel lol. I dont like people looking at me as i open the gift they gave me. I guess i dont want them to see disappointment in my face as i open it lol. My bdays coming up and my girlfriend has been telling me how goo the present she got me is. Makes me slightly nervous..
Guys, do you think it's a kind of 'psychological defect' if we don't like gifts? Normally gifts are something most people like, isn't it?
Yeah. May be... May be it's a mental disease, to dislike gifts. May be it's a sign of lack of apathy, lack of feeling, lack of emotion... ! I've always been sort of ... like that. Lack of feeling and lack of emotion. But only in real life. I think on the internet, I'm much more... emotional. Hm... why is that? Because of the cover? Hm... strange...
I'm with you. There are things that are worth so much more that could be given to me. Gifts are bullshit. Just a trip to a shop and some cash. Doesn't really take much, does it?
the reason you probably don't like receiving these kind of gifts is because you realize that this is not the way gift giving was intended to be. if somebody wants to randomly give something to another person out of the kindness of their thoughts and heart, whether random or say they are in a store and see something that reminds them of a friend and they get it for them, thats a real gift.. or to someone in a time of need..those kinds of gifts are much more appreciated anyways. generic gifts are kind of annoying, and gifts should never be expected.
Yeah... probably... Also that I don't like the fact that when something is given or recieved as a 'gift', say... a pen... then that pen becomes more than just a pen. It becomes the pen that was given to me by this and that person. And I think that's too much of a tag on what is simply a pen.
He loved it. He was obsessed with Batman and the Joker, particularly Nicholson's. The present came late, because the inspiration waned for a bit, but I knocked it all out in one night, gave minimal warning, and I seriously think he almost cried when he got it. We're broken up and not even hardly friends at this point, but it still hangs on his wall. I think he'd take it as a personal offense if I tried to ask for it back to keep in a portfolio.