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gf ALWAYS wants to spend time with me

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by HighHaze, Aug 18, 2008.

  1. im leaving for college this weekend and it seems like she always wants to hang out and do somethin and i just want to chill at home (without her). We go to the gym pretty often together (3-4 times a week) and hang out afterwards alot.

    yesterday she got mad because she said she wanted to spend time with me later that day even though we just got back from the gym and going to target and the supermarket together....all of which took 2+ hours.

    then my dad called and said he wanted to take me out to eat (he only takes me out on sundays and that would be the last time before i left) so i said ok and my gf got mad because i wouldnt get to spend any more time with her that day (not to mention she was on her period).

    god damn i feel like she just wants to always do something and always wants to talk on the phone even though she isnt saying anything, and when i dont talk on the phone she gets upset but she is the one that called me.

    if she cant understand that i want to have one last dinner with my dad before i leave to college then she can get mad all she fuckin wants.

    im not attracted to her like how i was in the beg. of the relationship. i dunno, maybe im just bein an asshole.
     
  2. sorry for the clinginess. must suck. and how can she not understand a dinner with dad? that's family! you always gotta make an exception for family! maybe since you're going to college, she just wants to spend as much time with you before you go off. how long will it be till you see her next? have you tried telling it to her gently so she won't blow up?

    well.. of course it's not gonna be like the beginning because now you're starting to notice all of her flaws. it's always like that. if she continues to act in that manner or try to not understand your situation, then maybe you'll find someone better suited for you at college? :confused_2: how long has the relationship been?
     
  3. that was my reasoning, i didnt say anything to her because if she cant figure that out on her own then.....i dunno.

    its been 2 years.....the thing is i broke up with her before and wanted to be with her ever since i broke up with her, but when im with her its like i dont wanna be with her. so confusin
     
  4. you only want to be with her because you haven't found a better substitute. i felt the same way about my guy but i just didn't want to jump back into the past. cause yeah i feel for him, but then at the same time, i found these little things to be so annoying about him that i was kind of disgusted. pretty bad but yeah -- she'll just have to prove herself in the relationship. otherwise, axe it. family is important. number one priority!
     
  5. that maybe true but wow....it sucked breaking up with her the first time i dont think i could do it again, call me a softy if ud like :eek:. i mean she is a great person....she lended me $200 to buy a winter coat and just has a nice personality (except when she is on her period). the only things i really dont like about her are the things mentioned above, her not supporting me making music, and her catholic ways....

    also, physically im not that attracted to her because she is a little overweight and thats why i got her going to the gym (didnt tell her about her weight though). the more i look
     
  6. haha nah i get it. i hate breakin up too. i just don't know how to say it or put it in a way so it doesn't sting so bad. but yeah i just suck at it. but better for it to be done with instead of leading her on. and don't tell her she's overweight! whatever you do, DON'T tell her. that is one of the most insulting things a guy can ever tell a girl. and of course there will be pros as well as the cons. but which side of the scale is better? oh yeah. she's not supporting your music? that's bad.. she should be your number one fan.
     

  7. ive never told her she was overweight, i told her i love her and her body for what it is which is. im honestly not sure which is better, if i had to guess id say being with her. but it sucks seeing all of these other girls with like perfect bodies and fat asses pass by then i look at my gf's body then sigh. the other girls are even giving me the eye and checking me out. it sounds fucked up but im just being real, i mean im a guy. personality is most important but body is important too....

    she doesnt support my music....she called it "that thing you do" in a sorta degrading manner which offended me, and she even called it silly. because of this, i dont tell her anything about my music or tell her when i have a new song. i used to write songs for her and she used to like em but i feel like she only liked em because it was for her, she doesnt actually appreciate my music itself. i stopped writing songs for her too btw. i wish i had a gf who appreciated what i did and i can share my music with her, instead its a solo project. sorry im typing so much :eek:
     
  8. haha get it all out. as for checking out other girls? perfectly normal. you can't deny looking at something that is attractive. looking at beautiful things is human nature. it's just if the guy is trynna hoot and holler at the chick, then there's a problem. hehe. and i agree that physical attraction is right under personality. if anybody says they want to wake up with a person who frightens them every morning in bed after they roll over, they're fucking lying!

    she seems just a bit selfish when it comes to your interests. music is pretty important and for you to dedicate your time and be serious about it, then she should be just as serious as in supporting you too. just because not all of your songs are about her, doesn't mean that she has a right to call it silly. everyone has different passions. what does she like to do best? that's like you calling that silly. if she respected your music and how you were doin your thang, cool. but she can't even acknowledge it correctly! calling it "that thing you do". that could make it or break a relationship you know. if there's no encouragement or support, then what do you have?

    just bring up those points in the next round of war!
     
  9. exactly, that really turned me off when she said that. ive stopped caring about that whole situation with her and my music though.

    but im always lookin at other girls lookin at me and vice versa.....for a long time too, like we both know whats on our minds, but i never say anything.

    btw ur the best kinkz, i appreciate you takin the time out to give me replies :D
     
  10. no problem dude! :wave:
     
  11. i think you should just be straight up with her and tell her what's bothering you and how it's pushing you away. sounds to me like it's just not working out, though, because you seem to be on two different levels. if you don't want to be with her then don't be, seems like you are just attached since it's been two years.

    you're going to college so maybe it's just time to move on. there will be plenty of new opportunities, trust me! she will be sad at first but eventually she will move on too.
     
  12. yea im convinced that this is the deal. i just told her how i felt (closed the IM) and i think she gave me my space because after we talked all she said was "alright" and hasnt said anything for about...an hour, which is somewhat a long time to go without talkin to her considering we are always on the phone/on aim talking to each other
     
  13. one hour is long for her to not talk????o_O
    wow....
    you have to explain to her that you are a couple.not siamese twins...
    no you're not being an asshole..you are taken away your space..everybody needs their space..

    and yes i have to agree with the rest,you dont seem lie you like her that much...maybe its the routine that keeps you and not your intrest anymore..
     
  14. i like a girl who clings alot, but maybe it was just the 2 girls because they were very laid back like me
     
  15. Has she always been clingy?

    Women are very intuitive. Its possible she picks up on nonverbal signals you're sending and fears she's losing you (which you, in so many words, said).. and is trying to hold onto you (ie: spending more time with you)
     
  16. honestly, sounds like she might be hormonal from being on her period, mood swingy perhaps and she's probably gonna miss you like crazy while you're away at school man. If i had a girl i was crazy about and i knew i wasn't going to see her often for a while then i'd definately wanna spend a shitload of time with her before she left too.

    the only way i could explain the dinner scenario is that she might be either just jealous cuz of moodswings/irritability or she just really really misses you... maybe you could've invited her along?? idk man...

    but yea, it seems like she's clingy all the time... like you said with the talking on the phone but not saying anything for hours, and getting mad when you dont wanna talk... so just ask for your space (as you apparently did already. bravo sir.)

    most importantly, learn to tell someone what bothers you about them. It really sucks to say it to someone you like/love but letting little things push you away for extended periods of time can really ruin a relationship... so be open with her and tell her what's on your mind, this goes for any girl you may date in the future. However, you may have already ruined how you feel about your current-ish girl by waiting this long...

    good luck either way man. these scenarios suck
     
  17. I agree with the last half - he should be open with her..

    But come on dude. Blaming it on her period is bullshit, just like if SHE blames it on her period its bullshit. People LOVE to blame PMS or the period. It's not the period.
     
  18. u could always just let her read this thread, im sure she would break up wid u prolly lol
     
  19. she's insecure. .

    help her with that
     
  20. u got a stage 5 clinger right there u need to get rid of her that is how my bros gf is she says she will change but 4 years later and 40 break ups and get back togethers so my advice is


    HITCH IT OR DITCH IT
     

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