I remember walking into a store with my friends and a laser pointer, friend pointed it on some random person and I said "Yes, brown shirt and blonde hair. Confirmed. Take the shot!" while I was walking by her. She noticed the red dot and ducked and ran out of the store. Kind of mean but oh well lol.
I told a petitioner its against my religion to sign a petition she just looked at me for like 5 seconds said "um ok" and walked off funniest shit ever!
called a fat chick a doughnut hole and laughed my ass offSent from my SCH-S738C using Grasscity Forum mobile app
" this guy is a mushroom because god didnt wanted him to be a human being " Sent from my HTC Desire C using Grasscity Forum mobile app
I was Christmas shopping with my wife at Kmart... we were back by the men's section by the coats and shit and she was looking for gloves and a knit hat for her nephew. All the racks in that area are low, so you can see everybody...and there was like a dozen people back there. So I'm about 60 feet from my wife...HIGH as shit. I vaped a PAXful just before we left the house...anyway this woman just a few feet from my wife started coughing really bad.....then she farted...and I mean it was LOUD...So I tried to whisper to my wife who was 60 feet away "Did that woman just shit herself?"...the woman and every other motherfucker in that area were all closer to my wife then I was...so basically I yelled this shit across the store...My wife gave me the evil eye...as did the woman, and everybody else just hunched over snickering. I was so fucking high I just started laughing my head off... I had to get out of there. I almost felt bad...But the other people were laughing at me and had to clear the area too. Except my poor wife who had to stand there and pretend she didn't know me. I fucking laugh every time I think about it. Now I'm a funny guy, and I have NO self edit function at all. So I say some pretty crazy shit...But in recent memory.. that is the funniest thing to me. And that was xmas 2012 not this past one.
>First time high>Go to theater>Sit in lobby>See ad of woman>Laugh because she is staring at me>Say she wants my dick loudly to friend>Group of girls at nearby table think im talking to them>They get up and leaveFriends laugh their asses off>I feel sadSent from my SGH-I337M using Grasscity Forum mobile app
I was at a funeral for my friends father stoned as shit and this lady in front of me farted while she was kneeling. It was so loud that it echoed i couldn't hold it in. I bursted out laughing then ran out. Pretended i sneezed lol. I didn't feel as much like an asshole b/c my friend said he even laughed.
Not me but a friend i was with.. we were watching this weird af lady preach about god at folk life In seattle (lots of drugs festival lol) my friend walks up to her with dozens of people walking by and yells out "smoke meth, hail saton" and walks away with people laughing and shit we were sober but smoked a few bowls with some ravers with cops walking around not giving a fuck. it was a Good day..
me and a few buddies went to taco bell blazed and my friend bet me he could win a free taco with the coin game thing, totally cheated the game by skipping the quarter to the winning platform by lightly jiggling it. I decided to try it and ultimatley resulted in me picking up the game and shaking it. had all of taco bell mean mugging me.
My most remembered and favorite stoner moment ever. Me and my cousin were going to our mma training about four years ago, we rode with one of the fighters from the gym who was also a stoner. We'd always smoke a blunt on the hour ride to training. This was early on in mine and his toking days, so we always got really high. The driver, j takes me and my cousin E to the gas station. We get our drinks and are all standing in line. I'm in the left line and my cousin j and e are in the right line. E looks at me with that stupid super stoned grin and yells "Austin look at everyone in the store they all look mentally retarded" living in northeast tn, there's some hick ugly motherfuckers around. But I look around, and I swear everyone in the store looked like they had down syndrome or were just braindead. E and I lock eyes again in perfect unison and both bust out in a laughing fit. The most extreme laughing fit we've ever had. Everyone in the store is staring at us and this goes on for about 5 minutes. Long enough for.four or five people to be checked out. We get to the counter and J walks over and says if I don't stop laughing hes gunna powerbomb me through the counter. That makes me laugh even harder, which sets E off and the cashiers are just staring us down like what's wrong with these motherfuckers. We walk out and J is just shaking his head in disbelief. Thought id share. Thanks for reading.
lol I wouldn't get high before mma training but I had a similar experience. Walked into sheetz stoned with my buddy and he picks up a bottle of water and says "dude look.......water" we both geeked and unable to stop, we had to walk out lol. I still can't understand what was so goddamn funny
it was 2 in the morning, I decided to smoke with two of my friends. We ended up smoking 4 gs that night. Well, after I dropped them off at their house (in b.f.e by the way) I drove back into town. And I wanted Hot Cheetos really baddd!! So I headed to a store close to my house. And there's cops out like crazy (Turned out some 13 year old ran away with her Boy friend.)!! There was one behind me, infront of me,.in the turning lane. But I kept my cool and I just turned and parked at the store. I get out of the car and go inside and I think to my self "Wait if I get hot Cheetos it's gonna look suspicious." So what do I do? I grab a gallon of milk instead of Hot Cheetos and the cashier ,just stared and laughed. When I got home I swear I just stared. at the gallon of milk and laugh forever and think "the fuck did I just do?"
[quote name="justakissfromtexas" post="19433996" timestamp="1391068883"]it was 2 in the morning, I decided to smoke with two of my friends. We ended up smoking 4 gs that night. Well, after I dropped them off at their house (in b.f.e by the way) I drove back into town. And I wanted Hot Cheetos really baddd!! So I headed to a store close to my house. And there's cops out like crazy (Turned out some 13 year old ran away with her Boy friend.)!! There was one behind me, infront of me,.in the turning lane. But I kept my cool and I just turned and parked at the store. I get out of the car and go inside and I think to my self "Wait if I get hot Cheetos it's gonna look suspicious." So what do I do? I grab a gallon of milk instead of Hot Cheetos and the cashier ,just stared and laughed. When I got home I swear I just stared. at the gallon of milk and laugh forever and think "the fuck did I just do?"[/quote]Oh man, hahaha. That's such a stoner move
Me and a bunch of my buddies worked at a Christmas tree lot season a couple seasons ago just to make a couple extra bucks. Our manager was a total weirdo but he let us smoke there so we pretended to like him haha. But me and one of my friends ate some fat edibles and smoked some good ass tree from his bubbler right before work. We were already pretty high and the edibles hadn't even hit yet. A truck came and delivered trees and I swear it was like the hardest thing I've ever had to do trying to move those heavy ass trees all night when I was high as fuck. But we were still laughing our asses of at like everything. Good times Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
lmao, we went to jack in the crack one time after getting super duper ripped and my friend goes up to the front counter, leans over and grabs a cup from the dispenser thing, the person behind the counter is like wtf?? and we're all just standing there like whats this kid doing haha. so my friend goes and fill the cup with water and chugs the whole thing down, and turn to us with the hugest smile on his face and says "DAAANNKKK ass water" and we all started busting out laughing including the person behind the counter. Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
[quote name="fearjar" post="19428868" timestamp="1391010101"]I was Christmas shopping with my wife at Kmart... we were back by the men's section by the coats and shit and she was looking for gloves and a knit hat for her nephew. All the racks in that area are low, so you can see everybody...and there was like a dozen people back there.So I'm about 60 feet from my wife...HIGH as shit. I vaped a PAXful just before we left the house...anyway this woman just a few feet from my wife started coughing really bad.....then she farted...and I mean it was LOUD...So I tried to whisper to my wife who was 60 feet away "Did that woman just shit herself?"...the woman and every other motherfucker in that area were all closer to my wife then I was...so basically I yelled this shit across the store...My wife gave me the evil eye...as did the woman, and everybody else just hunched over snickering. I was so fucking high I just started laughing my head off... I had to get out of there. I almost felt bad...But the other people were laughing at me and had to clear the area too. Except my poor wife who had to stand there and pretend she didn't know me. I fucking laugh every time I think about it. Now I'm a funny guy, and I have NO self edit function at all. So I say some pretty crazy shit...But in recent memory.. that is the funniest thing to me. And that was xmas 2012 not this past one.[/quote]This is one of the funniest things I've ever heard. I keep imagining it and every time I do I burst out laughing.
i laughed so fucking hard lol. my friend did the same thing, we sent him in to get munchies instead of all of us going in stoney, and he just comes back with saltine crackers. says they were gonna know hes high for buying doritos and candy Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum