Feeling disconnected from myself.

(this might be hard to believe, but) it's probably mostly your age. As people go through certain stages in their lives they feel a lot of upheaval and confusion.

Getting close to thirty causes it a lot, especially if you aren't married with kids at that age.


So it's normal.

You aren't insignificant. You're the product of three and a half billion years of evolution. If any one of your ancestors over the last three and a half billion years hadn't survived long enough to reproduce you wouldn't be here today. That makes you pretty damn special.

It also means your genes have got what it takes to survive in this crazy world of ours, and to continue themselves to the next generation.


Keep reading and learning about what interests you. A few years ago I got interested in what makes humans universally find some things aesthetically appealing and other things disturbing - like why do we all find scary music "scary", and why do we all find "haunted houses" creepy. I read a lot about how certain shapes and dimensions affect our brains and the theories on why this happens. It just interested me at the time but now I'm really pleased I researched this stuff, it changed my perspective of the world and it makes me a bit unique coz not many people bother to question these things.

Don't worry about the confusion man, as you move from one comfortable place to another you have to go through confusion in order to break down your old routines and mindset and to establish new ones.

Enjoy your TB, I hope you find it useful.

 

I went through it once myself, I couldn't work out why I felt out of place all the time, it was really weird. So I didn't hesitate to go talk to a counselor about it.

Just talking it over helped a lot. It was her who told me that it's really normal as you're approaching 30. I didn't want to talk it over with my buddies coz that's not what they're there for. They aren't trained in that sort of stuff anyway. lol


GL man!! Life's really different from what it seems at first, it's all about up's and down's and being confused and finding answers. They don't teach you that sort of stuff at school!

 

To the original poster, I am currently finding myself in the very near same place as you are, reading and understanding such esoteric ideas as string theory and consipiracy theory really is a racking toll on the brain, that contemplation of the mind surprisingly takes up a lot of energy .. and sometimes I find myself getting headaches from thinking about it long enough ..

May I ask if you are receiving that MMJ for your IBS symptoms? Because I too, suffer from IBS - worst condition to ever fuck with my life.

 

I'm going to try laying off the ganja for a week, and let my body restore its natural balance. I'm sure a week off of the ganja will help clear my fogged mind.

 

you are insignificant

so is everything in relative to something, so don't worry about it - find beauty in insignificance

for instance - something as insignificant as yourself can still question the origin of the universe and the mind

don't let insignificance stop you from feeling happy and from feeling love - embrace your insignificance - your worthlessness in the grand scheme of things, and know that in this moment, no matter what, you are alive and there is nothing that compares to being alive

you said you experienced ego death - do you know how many people strive to reach such a profound level of consciousness?

 

if youve been reading up on 2012, i assume youve been reading about that religious hoohar bout jesus coming and its the end of the world, well honestly, i feel that religion brain washes people to feel insegnificant so they can get more followers and thats the main reason why religion still thrives today.

 

if jesus actually does come, it will be a long time before he brings any of today's self proclaimed 'christians' with him

 

I'm there, man. It's turned me into a bitter, humorless introvert. I can't enjoy weed, people, music... its all fucked up. I know its a mind game, but yeah, you're not alone.

Good words amsterdamage

 

The question of us being significant or insignificant is one of life's greatest paradox. You may feel insignificant because we are one fraction of a microsecond in the universe, and we are a fraction of a particle in a huge time of events, such as the formation of the universe, the big bang, the string theory, the apocalyptic end of the world said to come at 2012. And the universe is so vast. I know exactly how you feel. I felt once before.

But when I felt it, I didn't feel bad or insignificant in a bad way at all. In fact, I started thinking of just how SIGNIFICANT I am. Though we are nothing but small fractions of particles in the wind called the universe and life, we are actually something to everyone and everything. You may find it hard to believe, but if you were to disappear from the face of the Earth, your life would affect many MANY others. You have absolutely no idea. If you want to get an idea of just how significant our lives are, grab a book called The Lovely Bones. This book sort of reinforces my idea of the paradox. We are nothing but fractions of a second in universe time, but we can literally live a lifetime in a fraction of a second. If you have ever been close to dying you would know what I mean, but either way I hope you understand what I mean.

So yes, we are insignificant. But ultimately a paradox has no absolute meaning. So if you choose to live your life as an insignificant particle of dust it is your choice. Just remember that we are also not insignificant. Our lives have impact on other lives, and can for generations to come. Think of how fate works. If you were to disappear from the face of the Earth, whose lives would you affect? Which lives would you bring together, and what sort of turn events would your life bring about. It's your life, live it to the fullest just as it is and don't sweat any of the shit that seems to be a big deal, because even though it feels like it is, ultimately it is not.

 

Yes. This man speaks the truth.

 

mabey we're all just stupid and nothing makes any sense at all.. smoke weed?