I act the opposite of how I feel... I feel completely empty all the time but yet I still smile and talk with friends like nothing is wrong. The reason I feel this way is because I've never had an actual girlfriend. (I'm 20) I see all my friends with their relationships and it makes me extremely jealous. The weird part is girls generally like me, it's not like I'm a fat dungeons and dragons nerd but I've yet to make a solid connection with a chick and it makes me sad. But I've been alone my entire life and it has never got to me like it has recently. Part of the reason, I know is my roommate brought over this girl he knew in high school to chill and smoke, you know...and it was almost like I fell in love with her at first sight lol. it sounds cheesy as fuck but its true. I told my roommate that I was into her and he told me she is dating someone but it's just a causal thing. She comes over every once in awhile now to chill with us and every time I see her I want to just tell her how I feel but it doesn't seem right... There's an insane amount of stuff I can write about how I'm feeling but that's probably not necessary give me some comfort gc
Sounds like you're lovesick man. I for one think it's a real thing anyway, and it sucks. One thing you could try doing is invite her over just you and her to just chill and smoke and see how you get along without your roommate around. If you guys have a good time and you're comfortable with each other than just tell her you like her. If she likes you too, well then there you go, and otherwise as long as you don't do it in a creepy or demanding way she'll probably just be flattered and say that she's fine how things are. If that happens then you just go on as friends and forget it ever happened.
I would love to do that, but unfortunately it would be difficult to get her to hang out with me alone. I live with four other people and it would be incredibly awkward. I don't know. Perhaps I'm over thinking it.
i wish i could help dude but i am in the same boat as you idk maybe theres some consolation in that. im 20 as well and have had more opportunities than i care to even think about right now, just have never been able to go with the flow with any of them generally speaking i attract (beautiful if i may say so myself) women well enough but as soon as things begin to turn intimate everything suddenly feels different and i change from that funny dude to the awkward loner, i have no good reason for this ive just always been like that from my first potential girlfriend in the 7th grade onwards and like you said im really starting to feel its toll now...its gotten to the point where my past is dictating my future and that makes me feel so down ive thought a lot about this...probably too much for my own good and my conclusion is that the solution is expanding my comfort zone and realizing that my horrible track record is not who i am--i know that is good advice but its easier said than done so in the end, at least right now i really could use a fucking break
^ yea dude I totally feel you. I know happiness doesn't just appear once you have a girlfriend but, right now, that sounds a lot better than what's going on now. But even when I realistically think about having a girlfriend, I couldn't really make someone happy right now, I have no money. And that is a total bummer. See, that's whats so fucked up. I have no money, no girlfriend, no life. What the fuck. As I re-read my post, I sound hella depressed. but I'm not. It's so fucked.
dude ive been living like that for a long while now...like honestly since before highschool. i can still have a fucking awesome time with my friends and did throughout my teens but there is an empty part of me that has never been filled and its been empty so long that ive learned to live with the emptiness and i feel like that is what has crippled me when it comes to girls. its a perpetuating cycle and the only way to break it is to jump in...which is the problem...which is the solution its just too goddamned ironic for me man still though i have had a positive attitude because i always knew it was/is not the end of the world and was/is not the most important thing in this life but of course logic can not last me a lifetime ultimately its a need that i have longed to fulfill since my youth. peace to you brotha
thanks man that actually made me feel a lot better. I don't know you at all but it feels like we are oddly similar. perhaps i'm stoned. perhaps. I'm gonna sit back in my chair and smoke this bowl and ponder my life.
ya gotta take the plunge my man! ask her out, ask her to go get high with you some time. obviously you two have something in common. I would break my arm to bang a highschool chick again! if you are a virgin, go get laid, call up some escort or bang some hooker to break the ice.
The woman who loves you won't care if you have no money. Material things and dates just aren't that important when you can sit with somebody you love, do nothing, and be completely happy. You're only 20. Take your time. You've got the rest of your life. The girl situation will work itself out. If it was meant to be, it'll find a way. I truly believe that.
i wouldn't worry about it. 20 is still pretty young. and about the money thing I disagree. without money it's kind of tough to have a relationship. you don't need to be rich but if you are totally broke then it's pretty hard, the girl must really really love you a lot to just sit around and do nothing with you... well sex is free lol but are you going to just sit around having sex and watching tv? actually that sounds nice lol but I don't think most girls will like that. if you are a broke student she would understand but otherwise she'll probably think you are a loser and look for a guy that has $$$.
funny how i share some music with ya earlier then i stumble upon this thread and find myself in the same boat as you guys, small world eh. i try an keep a positive attitude about it and hope that i will find a relationship or it will find me in time, so for now i sit back, toke a bowl, and enjoy what i have in life, and think about how to work towards what i want.
My boyfriend and I do a whole lot of nothing together. We're always scrounging up change to buy shit, hah. It's not FULL of sex and TV, although that does happen a lot, and I defintiely don't mind. Haha. We always find something to do. It makes me sad, too because a lot of girls ARE like that (finding richer guys). The good ones are out there, though.
Don't worry you'll find the right girl soon enough. I was in the same situation about a year ago, never had an official relationship, always just hookups...but then this one girl found me, and she's absolutely amazing. I'd sacrifice my life for her and she'd do the same for me. I was just like you...I never thought it would happen. I could never connect with girls because of my anxiety, but look where I am now Don't worry man, she'll find you soon enough, just be patient