Dude you seriously need to man the fuck up. I saw your other thread about this girl and wasn't gonna say anything, but now you make another saying you want to cry like a girl? lol! cmon man... I was in basically the same exact situation before when I was like 17, only difference is she definitely wanted my dick but I just waited too long to make a move, and by the time I did I was just a friend in her eyes (never flat out told her I liked her; it's a general rule that you don't do that with girls). But you know what I did when I realized she didn't feel the same way? I got the fuck over it and deleted her number, started hanging out with all my boys again, went out to a few parties, threw a hell of a lot more at my own house, drank my fair share of alcohol, smoked a lotta pot, and hooked up with other sexier girls that I met while doing all of this that actually turned out to be a lot cooler than this girl I thought I was really into. After I cut her out, she would still hit me up once in a while, and you know what I would do? Fucking dick her calls and not answer her texts at all because she was just an annoying attention whore. A while from now, I guarantee you look back at this thread and get really embarrassed about the way you acted and how you handled the situation. Or maybe you really won't, the way you're talking right now makes me think you're a lost cause. You're ten years older than I was when I was in this type of situation and you're handling it as if you were a fucking 12 year old! Move the fuck on dude, forreal...
thanks man. I know i'll eventually get over it but it hurts a lot and takes me a loooong time. I still have a few girls I was crushing on that rejected me on Facebook and I never talk to them anymore and now that i look back I don't even care. I also cried after my ex broke ups with me 2 years ago and I thought that she was so great but now I don't even care . even thought I know all this. this still makes me sad. i've been hanging out and talking to this girl almost everyday for the past 2 months (not hanging out everyday but talking to her everyday). I've slept at her house, gone out dancing with her. basically had a unrealistic fantasy of ending up with her. and honestly she is really nice to me. she made me a bed to sleep on at her house gave me breakfast. she would listen to my problems. and she had the same sense of humour as me and could make me laugh. it wasn't just that I thought she was "hot" I don't even think she is that god looking.
haha sorry. it's just that the school work is a lot and it's stressing me the hell out. it's become my whole life lol, its all I really talk about and in the weekends I go out sometimes and drink away my misery. It's really changing who I am.... I don't know if it's a good or bad thing.
yeah I know..... but I don't know if she was lying to me but she told me she dated one guy for a year and never had sex with him. a couple weeks ago one of her guy friends she's known for 3 years came over and he slept with her in her room..... and he is apparently just a friend and they have never dated. she mentioned the guys she has dated before. this was after I mentioned I don't like slutty girls..... she ask told me that she never officially dated guys really just started hanging out and they started liking each other. I think she was just bulshitting me.
it was mine too and still is but it is sooo hard.... you will pretty much have no social life. it's just reading all day everyday. but I guess it will be worth it in the end if you make it.
Sorry, but I'm going to have to call shenanigans on you being 27 and in law school. If you have that mentality at this point in your life you are doomed. The way you handle the situation from the get-go was awful. Also, I just noticed a part where you said you slept at her house and didn't get laid? Friendzoned, hard as fuck. Sorry, bro
I am pretty smart I think, but I am prone to depression and anxiety and I think i'm way too fragile.1500 people applied to my school and 85 people got in including me and it was used on grades and lsat and other things like volunteer work. I understand what i'm doing is not what a 27 year old man should be doing. it's just that I think I have emotional problems or something. I get depressed so easily, and getting rejected by a girl I like messes up my brain and makes me act like a 12 year old boy. but she mentioned to me that she once dated a guy for one year and didn't even sleep with him. I don't even know if I can believe that. I think she was telling me that shit so I don't think she is a slut. cus like I said I told her I'm not into slutty girls. she also told me she was a virgin until she was 20.
^ haha yeah. maybe it's cus I've only had one real girlfriend and that was 2 years ago. i'm not very good at getting girls. people find me funny and girls even tell me that i'm funny (I can make them laugh and have fun) and i'm also nice and people do like me. but I can't get a girlfriend. well I could, but not a girl I want and I don't have super high standards or anything.
You know what the problem is? It's that you just throw your hook out into the sea,in hopes of catching a big beautiful fish and at the first sign of a tug,you reel it in right away,only to find a fish-less hook. In other words,stop giving your heart out to girls so quickly and easily,that way when you're rejected,it's not a big deal to you. You're also too available. I think you're starting to realize your faults when it comes to the opposite sex and that is good! Instead of being all sad about this,use this scenario as a learning experience and the next time a girl catches your interest,you'll know what to do and what not to do.You'll be able to read a girl better.You'll pick up her signals better. Besides,you shouldn't be sad over this girl,it's not like she was your gf and you shared this big romantic experience with her or anything.Just another beezy.
that is true..... she is basically the only girl that has given me much attention in 2 years..... and yeah we get along and she is funny. but there are of course a lot of other girls out there that have a good sense of humour and i'd probably have fun with. but because I don't experience this often, I somehow make this girl out to be so special in my mind. I think I'll never find another girl like this that will laugh at all my jokes and think i'm funny and have a good time with me. anyways I got to get off the internet i'm super behind in my readings..... I have to just read non stop for the next 4 weeks....
I know it doesn't mean anything right now (it never does), but time really does heal all wounds. Also, don't you dare say you wish you had no feelings. This should be one of the seven deadly sins. You can't know what happiness is unless you understand sorrow. You can't know what brings satisfaction until you've been deprived. Hardship is what makes us grow as people. To the people saying man up... Yea, some harder skin would help, but that takes time and develops at different speeds for different people. Perseverance will get you through your tough times (that feel though now but won't seem that way in the future). Just focus on the positives in life right now. You are going to law school and you are working your ass off. Just imagine the kind of woman you will attract when you have your life in order... The kind of woman you want. Someone who appreciates you because you took the time to better yourself. At least I hope that is what you want... Dare I say what you ought to want (I can't really tell you what to look for, but I think this is pretty important). What is a relationship aside from mutual appreciation of one another? You need to deserve that appreciation by choosing to better yourself, which you seem to be doing currently. This probably won't help you right now, and maybe it never will, but this is how I would approach the situation, myself not currently being flooded with emotion and stress. It is easier to think like this outside of that environment (which is why time heals all wounds, your perception changes with your surroundings which change with time).
You need some hobbies that get you outdoors and focusing on something else. Don't do them specifically to meet girls, just to diversify your lifestyle and take your mind off your sadness and meet some (preferably male) friends. Any communal farms in your area you can volunteer at? Your uni probably has tons of clubs. Maybe an outdoors club? A climbing club? A hiking club? Maybe there's a radio station you could volunteer at? Do you like chess? Maybe a cooking club? A sushi making club? Def look into university clubs. You're preying on yourself because you lack social stimulation. Girls can be hurt just as badly as you are. Most def.
Thing is... that's all in your head. It's true that people are predisposed to certain mindsets, but you do have some power over this sort of thing. You can train yourself to think differently, it's just not easy. But the first step is definitely to distance yourself from that kind of surrender to self described fragility and emotional problems. It can't change until you decide it must. If you ever plan to not be fragile and so easily depressed, the first thing you have to do is believe you're capable of change and commit to that. Believing you cannot change will make it get continually worse for the rest of your life instead of quietly, maybe slowly better.
You could just be real, and ask her to be your friend again. Except this time, choose not to obsess over her. When a girl says 'i hope we can be friends', she usually means it. Its really up to you. U gotta realize people do what they want. If she doesnt want to date you, she doesnt want to date you. If you wanna be friendless and sulk over her, do it. If you wanna be friends again and enjoy her company, then do that.
^ you think I should start talking to her again? but i've already told her that I don't think guys and girls can be friend. specially when you like the girl. also if I like her and keep on being friends i'm scared that i'll just get hurt more when she does get a boyfriend. i'm fine being friends with her now but I don't know how i'd feel when i'm friends with her and she's dating some guy. it'd probably get to me. and every time i'm around her not being able to have her would hurt me. so basically not being friends with her hurts me and being friends with her would also hurt me. not sure which is worse. begin friends is kind of nice because it gives me the false hope that maybe one day she'll change her mind and want me more than a friend.