Well, my girlfriend broke up with me a little over a week ago. I'm going to try and do the entire story really short with only the important details. *Dated for almost a year. *Broke up just over a week ago. I called her to say goodnight, she said she doesn't want to see me anymore, no explanation except "I'm not happy." *Ex has some issues. Spent much of her life in and out of the hospital for a rare disease. Has had over 10 major surgeries, and has spent multiple 2+ month stretches in the hospital. *Ended up being diagnosed with PTSD and depression from childhood hospital experiences. *Refused to get help. *Last couple months she hit rock bottom. The day she dumped me she started anti-depressants and started seeing a therapist. *She's been texting me almost every day since we broke up. We've met up twice in person. *After meeting yesterday she started crying, said she still loves me, breaking up with me was spontaneous and she wishes she hadn't done it. BUT now that we are broken up, she said this is the best way for us to each work out our own personal problems (I'm seeing a psychologist for depression as well). She feels that being together now isn't possible because our personal issues effect the relationship and makes us both worse. This is hard for me. I've always had a rule. When a relationship I'm in ends, I cut contact, move on. No talking, no being "friends." I'm serious about this girl though. I'm at the age we're I've been around the block enough times to know I don't want to walk away from this. I know everyone here is going to tell me "there's other girls out there, cut off contact with her, not worth it, go **** some new bitches, etc." I don't know what to do this time.
If you like her go for it. I think she just needs time or whatever. Go talk to her saying that you'll give her space but if she ever needs anything you're just a phone call away. Bitches love that shit
Give her time, but don't leave her. If she wants or needs some time, let her have it. As my ex told me once "sometimes a girl needs a friend, not a boyfriend", but that doesn't mean she loves you any less.
I went through a similar situation with my girlfriend minus the psychological problems for her. If you're serious about her then you don't have to cut all contact with her. But it probably is for the best that the two of you take some time to work on your individual problems before you try to take on a serious relationship. Good luck, brother
Idk. She seems to need to work things out. I think a relationship thrives if each person independently can find happiness from within themselves. She can't. If she comes back to you she might rely on you make her happy. Op. What if something happened to you? What if you found someone else...what if work made you move away? If she gets over he depression and PTSD by relying on you for companionship and support, then this could make her relapse hard. She needs to heal independently...as do you. I don't know her. I don't know you. But from what you say, it seems you both need a little bit of self reflecting time. You guys are alone and going through major steps towards ideal mental health and you are relapsing and falling to a familiar face for support. Honestly. Not wise. I'm not saying move on. I'm saying if you guys are to have a relationship, you should make sure it is you and her working, living, and healing independently from each other. No relying. No supporting. Just making sure no one relapses.
Thanks everyone. Lots of good advice. Talked to her today. I told her I can give her the space she needs, but I will always be there when she needs me. I just need to know if she thinks there's a future for the two of us. She said she honestly doesn't know how she feels right now, but we should get together this week and talk about things. So, hopefully, that's soon.
If you think you can make a go at it and you love her, then you will. If this is someone you simply don't see spending the rest of your life with, then hit it and quit it.
Gave her an ultimatum on Wednesday. Friday will be two weeks since we split up. It would have also been our 1 year anniversary. I don't buy the whole "I need space, I'm not sure how I feel bullshit." If she doesn't know how she feels after two weeks, then it's obviously bullshit and we're never getting back together. I told her I'll be waiting at the bar in the restaurant that I asked her out at. I said I'll be there at 11, and I'll wait until midnight. If I don't see her, there's nothing left to say and I don't think there should be anymore contact between the two of us.
Wow,man! Everything you just described,was exactly what happened with me and my ex.Only thing that was different was talking after the break up.Everything else was the same all the way up to the actual break up itself and her only explaining it by saying she isn't happy. July 11th would have been our 1 year anniversary too!We broke up though the last day of January.But ended up getting back together for a bit in the middle of April. But during our time back together,she said she regretted breaking up with me.She was even drunk one nite and said she would marry me if I asked her tf course I didn't ask,but yeah. But then she decided to break up with me again and that's when I was totally done.Especially after all the shit I did for her after we got back together.Spent a shit load of money that I didn't have AND did real nice things for her. Fucked up shit,but her loss.
Ya can't truely love somebody else until you love yourself, sir. You try and make it work again, will only end in disaster. Take the break and fuck off for a while, while your still on good terms. Make yourself better, then come back. If she really wants you still she'll take ya back, boyfriend or not.
She said today she doesn't love me anymore. She never will. And she's already seeing somebody else who makes her happier than I ever did. So i deleted her from Facebook and deleted her number.
That's harsh.... Seeing another dude already? No offense dude, but fuck her. Move on and go find someone else that truly makes you happy. If she doesn't want you, then you're not meant to be.
Yeah FUCK her!And not in a good way. That's bullshit.And it's only pissing me off even more because today would have been my one year anniversary with my ex.Fuck both of them! The only reason she is telling you that shit is to be a straight up bitch. Karma WILL come back to her.This dude she is seeing is going to end up being the biggest tool to walk the earth and she'll realize what she used to have and regret it for a very long time.
give her time; try and be friends but most importantly, spend time working on you. if she doesn't want a relationship, you can't change that. -- oh. fuck what i said. screw her. she's a cunt!
haha dude fuck that welcome to life she probably loves you. I bet you'll be the one denying her friendship in the very end...
This. I hope this happens in my case too.Just so she can think about how fuckin stupid she was to do what she did.