My argument is that, for the girl you're dealing with at least, friend zones don't exist. There's friends, and there's not friends. In my second post I explained that if you're in the 'friend zone,' it's because you've placed yourself there and don't want to leave. That's fine. It's just not our fault that we don't want you as something more than that. Don't like it? Don't be 'friends' (if that's what you want to call it) with that girl anymore. We don't want fake friends any more than you want a constant reminder of being rejected.
It's not that they cant be but virtually ever guy I've ever known while friendly towards women is not friends with them. I.E: They don't hang out together one on one or outside of a group setting. Most guys if there is no chance of sex are not gonna hang with a pretty girl just because she's 'cool' if that's the case, then typ the opposite applies. Yeah this girl Sarah she smokes, plays XBOX, likes to go to Sporting events, and loves zombie movies. But she told me she really cares about me as a friend and doesn't want to mess that up, we were gonna go to a Pacers game but shes wanting to bring this guy shes seeing along....FUCK ALL OF THAT BULLSHIT. (Disclaimer: I've been in a perfectly happy relationship for almost 3 yrs now, this is an example taken from my worst friend zone experience that happened 5 or so yrs back) I may be a masochistic douche though too, I stopped all contact with her, made her cry, and when she called asking if I had weed to sell her and her dude I exhaled a big blunt rip and said "Nope" and hung up on her.
This what i got out of your post. A guy is one of these 3 things to a girl. 1. in a relationship ( strong emotional and physical connection) 2. friends ( small-medium emotional connection) 3. nothing (doesn't like you, no emotional connection) Another thing, although being "friends" does means that she likes on on some level, it's still a form of rejection. Because there is obviously some kind of flaw that is stopping her from wanting anything more from you. At least that's how it's viewed from a male perspective Question for female blades- Could you be physically attracted to a guy and still put him in the "just friends" basket?
I've never been friend-zoned. I never will. Although I can't see a problem with having a female friend, I will not continue to hang out with a girl often if I want a relationship and she doesn't.
Well, if you've ever stopped hanging out with a girl because she didn't want a relationship, then you have been friend-zoned. And yeah you don't have to be in the friend-zone for a long time, it's just a categorization.
Looks like you've got it. Consider what being 'friends' usually means - someone you can talk to, hang out with, share interests with, etc. You move up from that into a romantic relationship if both people have a sexual or romantic interest in each other. If a girl really only wants to be friends, then you don't exhibit what she's looking for in a romantic partner. It's rejection, yes, and it's up to you to decide whether you can deal with it or not. This is the healthiest way to deal with that kind of situation, and I wish more guys would think this way.
I think/hope you'll find that as you grow older more and more of the guys you encounter will have figured it out; I mean, even I figured it eventually, and I was completely clueless for a few years.
[quote name='"Makizushi"']I've never been friend-zoned. I never will. Although I can't see a problem with having a female friend, I will not continue to hang out with a girl often if I want a relationship and she doesn't.[/quote] You've been fz'd you just can't come to terms with it. That's ok.
[quote name='"JamestheFreak"']Lol I don't even become friends with females, or anyone really.[/quote] I thought what we had was speshul
No. Even if the dude is a dick towards her, if she finds him attractive and they hit it off in the bedroom she won't. Taken from my couple of friend zone experiences, one girl i knew, Melissa, got cheated on multiple times. The other girl Sarah that I posted about earlier got beat to the point of having a severe concussion, and yet put up with his ass because, according to mutual friends of ours she said 'He didn't mean it' and also that 'He looks so good in bed, and hes really good to me'. Dude ended up one night trying to choke her out in the bathtub. He was a fucking psycho, she dumped him and tried to get back in contact with me, even ran into her folks at the supermarket who raved about how good I was to her, gave me her cell number, told me what had happened in regards to the bathtub assault, and asked me to call her. Her mom and dad being absolute sweethearts I obliged but called when I knew she wouldn't be available (work). To steal a line from Airplane: 'They bought the tickets, they knew what they were doing. I say, let 'em crash.' Perhaps that's an extreme case or generalization, but from what I've seen for both sexes if the person making advances on them is physically attractive to the person being hit on/being shown interest, then typically no they are not gonna get friend zoned. A guy may 'hit it and quit it' but a girl typically will, especially if she likes a guy for his looks, try to advance it something more, and will put up with a lot of shit especially if she has self esteem issues which both of the previously mentioned girls had.