Epic Parties

Discussion in 'Real Life Stories' started by Crackers 420, May 8, 2011.

  1. Hey, grasscity. This is my first post on my new account and so I want to share with you all a little story and hear your own experiences.

    This story is actually about two parties that occurred in the same night about a month ago and I think I will split it between two threads just for readability's sake.

    The first party was at the house of my best friend. I turn up soon after it starts with a crate of Stella Artois, some cigarettes and a small baggy of weed. The atmosphere is pretty chill with some music and drinking; but this was before the party had truly started, about twenty people were yet to arrive. When these guys and girls eventually arrive, the party really kicks off, there are about fifty people here (not a lot considering the amounts I've seen in this thread but it was still fucking crazy) and I'm feeling a good buzz at this point. I was about to go outside to smoke a few cigs and some weed when I realised that I needed to find somewhere to hide my stuff from thieves and so I scour this house for an empty room for my bag and I eventually find a bed to put it under (as it turns out, my friend's shit of a little brother was in that room fapping on chat roulette without me noticing; but more on that later). Anyway, I go outside and spark up a spliff and then a cig with a few mates and by now I've got a pretty good buzz going. I somehow manage to get locked in a garage and when I'm released I start throwing stones at houses and shouting for the neighbours to join this "bomb-ass party" when I hear the loudest scream of "SHIIIIITTTT!". I run upstairs to see what's going on only to find the most ungodly huge shit in his toilet, stinking out the entire house; I'm talking fucking massive (we put it on rate my poo and it got poo of the month, the image is attached)


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    By this point I'm having the time of my life when I do one of the stupidest things an asshole could do at a party. I go up to one of my friends with the bright idea of "flipping the switch on the house's fusebox". My friend thinks that this is a fucking genius idea and so hoists me up through this tiny kitchen window to the fusebox. I'm laughing my tits off as I fall through this tiny gap and proceed to flick every fucking switch on this box. I finally hit the right one and power to the whole house goes off. Everyone is screaming. This must have pushed the host's brother over the edge because, as I said earlier, he was upstairs on the computer. About five minutes later the host announces that his dad is on the way home and that we all need to leave, so I grab my bag and follow every one into the woods outside. We all chill in this forest for a while trying to find a new party to go to when an awesome friend of mine comes up to me and tells me that me, three other of my mates and this girl that he's interested in can stay round his. The girl declines but me and the lads say "fuck yeah!" as the guy who's house we're going to has a hot twin sister with even hotter friends.

    I had sobered up by now and the time was only 21:30: I knew that the night was still young and so we drove down to my friend's house. Act 2 of my epic night was about to begin and it would prove to be even more memorable than what had came before...
  2. When we arrived at this house, I walked in only to be greeted by a symphony of the words "Alex is here! whoo!". This party was considerably smaller than the last with roughly 25 people there but they were some of the coolest people I know. I drink a few more beers and some nasty gin and vodka while just chilling in this guy's big house. I was at the stage of drunkenness where I become a complete clown and started saying some weird shit about how a wooden Buddha statue was actually my friend's preserved grandfather and how my friend must have stolen my bookshelf because his happened to have two novels that I had at home.

    I have a great time, singing and dancing to every song that comes on when I spot the cutest girl I know. I had been interested in this girl for months and she looked upset about something but I thought nothing of it and went upstairs to take a shit. When I went back to my friends I was laughing my ass off about how I had to duck bellow a window to wipe my butt so that no-one outside could see me.

    The house stank of bud and some guy I know had an eighth of some dank shit; smelling this just gave me a taste for weed and so I went outside to the smoking area. There were people throwing up everywhere which I found pretty funny until I saw the gorgeous girl from earlier, sitting alone, still looking sad. I sat next to her and she rolled up a joint of some weed that her friends had got her for her birthday; it got me pretty stoned and I was already drunk when she started crying and it hit me that it was about her boyfriend who treats her like shit. The twin sister from my last post recommended that I go upstairs with this girl and so I take her to my friend's bed.

    So here we are, chilling in my friend's bed and the next thing I know; we're fucking. Her and I walk downstairs only to have everyone asking us where the fuck we had been and so to escape, me and the girl go for a walk outside.

    When outside, my girl tells me that we're meeting her boyfriend (a guy I know who plays professionaly for the Republic of Ireland National Football Team. No lie.) so naturally, I'm paranoid as fuck that she's leading me to get my ass kicked (it must have been the weed). We meet the boyfriend and his mates and it turns out that they're chill (I guess he didn't know yet that I had fucked his girl) and we stand outside prank-calling people in the party. I can tell that the girl is pretty bored of her boyfriend dicking around outside and I keep getting texts from my friends who don't know where I am and are scared as fuck that I'm going to get the shit kicked out of me and so I decide that it's time for me and her to split.

    Me and this girl continue our drunken/high tour around this lovely English village only to find out that her boyfriend had sent his friends to follow us. We lose the bagage and she shows me a haunted house as well as the other sites of the area. We eventually come across a house with its Christmas decorations still up (it was April at this point) and this angers us deeply as we were fucked out of our minds and so we proceed to tear off every decoration on this house in the middle of the night. On the way back to the party, we find a full-sized suit of armour which was being used as some kind of garden decoration when I had the bright idea of bringing it back to the house and so we carry this massive weight back with us.

    You should have seen the look on everyone's face when the two people who had been missing for an hour come back at one in the morning with a fucking suit of armour, complete with sword. Honestly this girl has the craziest, most bubbly personality that I have ever encountered and you would never guess it from her shy exterior. I'm pretty tired by now and so I take her upstairs to my friend's bed for some more sex and then we fall asleep in each other's arms.

    When we wake up in the morning, we recall stories of last night and go our separate ways. On my journey home, I follow our path of destruction through the village and find a house surrounded in broken Christmas decorations and a group of people looking for their knight buddy. I then return home to reminisce and laugh my ass off about what a fucking crazy night I had.

    The stories in these two posts happened a month ago and no matter how crazy the first party was, it will always seem like the pre-party to the one where I screwed the most beautiful girl I know and my dreams came true. I have since learned that her boyfriend had told her to "get the fuck away from me" as she "barely knows me" to which she responded with a "fuck off". Me and her are still close and her asshole boyfriend has yet to kick my ass. All in all; the craziest, best night of my life.
  3. What. The. Fuck.
  4. Didnt even read this . Just saw a picture of a toilet with shit. Just gross..
  5. Dude thats fucking dope hahaha.
  6. What. The. Fuck.
  7. Damn dude... I need to get my ass over to the UK!
    That was the most epic thing I've ever heard... uh read I mean.
  8. coool story brahhh
  9. Minus the picture of poop, that was a fantastic story haha
  10. That was a shitty story

  11. *thumbs up*
  12. Tl;dr

    But the picture and the thread name"epic parties" leads me to believe its nothing i want to read about anyway. I'll stick to banging my head against the wall when I'm in the mood to destroy some brain cells.
  13. that's not shit that's chocolate:yummy:
  14. One of the rare example TL;DR's are worth reading
  15. #16 GreenHitOnSwole, May 9, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 15, 2016
    Dude youre gross
  16. Wait so you shut off the power and killed the first party? Then fucked up some peoples lawn decorations then stole some property? Thats fucked up bro. And wtf kind of picture was that?
  17. im hungry. ima go buy some hersheys
  18. The first party was always going to die, what with his annoying brother being in the house and me and this girl were too drunk/stoned to even care at the time. If it helps ease your mind, the suit of armour did find its way home eventually.

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