Made this account so I can post this since no other post I read really helped. In fact, other posts about this just made me feel worse. This one is a fatty. Whenever I smoke with other people they seem to all just wanna chill and do normal stuff, but I get really really high and talkative. I say dumb ass shit some times OR go suuper in depth on a story I wanna tell with retardedly descriptive details overexplaining everything. I've recently gained this strange sense of social awareness. STRANGE. I always only get one of two vibes from people now when we smoke together. 1. that they think I'm acting too high, faking it, or making stuff up/lying & are annoyed. 2. that everyone I'm with is in on some inside joke about me letting me make a fool of myself for their entertainment. I've begun to notice this more and more each time. No one else acts like me when we smoke together. Am I just misinterpreting their subtle behaviors and being paranoid or am I just waaay higher than them causing them to be annoyed. I'm looking for some legit help here. I have been smoking since 7th grade. I even remember my first time like a movie playing in my head. non-stop hehehe type giggling and then sneaking into the high school football game to not pay. I could not contain myself AT ALL while at the game and I was making a big scene because I couldn't stop giggling. I no longer laugh like a 3 year old girl, however I still seem to act like a childish bafoon and I guess it must be bothering my friends when we smoke. They all act really weird towards me. I get extremely into my high and have all this energy. All they seem to want to do is be chill and do normal stuff. But my mind RACES. I can't do normal stuff..like go grocery shopping...while high. I've tried several other much harder drugs but they're kinda boring to me, I love weed. When I get high, everything changes! I once described how things looked as "like I'm in a GTA cutscene" lol. I get retardedly high when I smoke and it doesn't take very much weed either. I've always had a super low tolerance but nevertheless kept up with my friends when we would smoke. There are times that I smoke when I can barely feel parts of my legs, my muscles will microtwitch uncontrollably but I can't necessarily feel them? (Hard to explain), I can't walk normally sometimes, feel weightless or floaty, slow-mo-ish etc. Other times I'm super energetic and talkative. I'll ramble like a madman and tell overly detailed stories. Very tangential stories where there's a story within a story within a story spiraling to no end. Sometimes I'll be a total goofball and make up words and phrases like chilly pilly or supety poopety. I consider myself pretty intelligent as I had passed both ap calc tests in my latter high school years. But when I smoke, I become a complete 6 year old retard. I'll say stuff like "bro I'm so high rn" repeatedly. Sometimes I swear I'm tweaking out. When I smoke with some people they seem to think I'm making shit up and just talking out of my ass, and others have this weird expression like their silently laughing at and judging me. I've never been aware of this until recently in the past two years when I began smoking regularly. This unexplainable social awareness now kicks in whenever I smoke and I feel as though I can pick up on everyone's subtle behaviors towards me. Now I get paranoid and trapped in my head and it's very unpleasant. I used to only smoke WITH people as a social occasion and now I very much prefer to smoke alone and just be with my crazy ass thoughts. I tried to Google "my friends act weird when I'M high" and all the results were something along the lines of "my friend acts weird when HE'S high". People would describe their friends acting weird and goofy then proceed to claim their friend is faking being so high. WTF? I can't possibly have such a low tolerance that I get absolutely WASTED off a gram of kush every single time I smoke while everyone else just chills out. I've been smoking every night for the past year now and if I smoke with anyone it all goes weird and bad and I regret it so much and hate life. PLEASE HELP. *Edit: pretty much only smoke blunts and prefer sativas exclusively, so maybe the nicki + sativa combo is getting me too riled up. Maybe I should try really sedating indicas and skip the nicotine? I live in a state where weed is legal so I have the luxury of choosing specific strains.
When people get high we go to different head spaces, honestly, by the sound of it, I wouldn't want to be around you either. My headspace is usually chill, introspective or exploring ideas with others, maybe enjoy food/sex/music as well. If your headspace is quite different, you either need to find people that are receptive to your headspace or explore it on your own. I assume you're receptive to the microgestures and cues from others that they aren't enjoying your company. Nothing wrong with that, just a difference. Maybe you should get out your childish creativity in another way? Explore and write your thoughts maybe a good, cute, funny story will emerge. The possibilities are endless! Try playing with kids, be silly with them. Don't suppress what you become when you are high, just find a way you can enjoy it or spread the joy to those who are willing.
TMI dude.... you need to chill Have you tried relaxing? I think you’re projecting your insecurities on other people, nobody likes that. I’ve smoked with people like you, and I’ve been you. Perhaps you’re partaking a little too much on the herb. Stop smoking every day, and focus on getting your mind right. Everything is all right.
Says been smoking since the 7th grade. Then says been smoking every day for a year....are you an 8th grader?
That's why I hated smoking with kids when I was around 17 or 18; they don't know how to act. Also I never smoked with anyone underage at anytime ever, the above sentence is a work of fiction; this is my disclaimer.
If only that was the case! I would love to go back in time when there were no responsibilities at all however I am 22 and super stressed out all the time with school and work.
Again mate, School???? At 22???? School finishes at 16-18 latest in the uk. Do you guys need an extra 4 or 5 years in the U.S? Is that why the legal drinking age is 21? You dont leave school untill youre 30 so still classed as a child untill then? Im cofused......l
I'm in college, I guess I should have clarified. I regard all forms of education as simply school. Don't give a flying fuck if you're getting a PhD from Cambridge, you're in school to me. Education should never end anyways, mate...
Indeed, 25 hours a week of class & lab + 30 hours a week of work as a diesel mechanic really wear me out. REALLY wear me out. So when I smoke, it's to sort of let everything out and reset. I no longer smoke with people as I used to, like I mentioned in the original post, it started as a social thing only. Now I just smoke at night when I walk my dog after work before bed. It helps me reflect on everything that day and process anything that I don't want bothering me the following day.