Dumbest thing you've done stoned ALONE?

Discussion in 'Real Life Stories' started by Nathan, Sep 7, 2009.

  1. Smoked a joint at the park,

    sitting on a bench after, people watching..

    noticed a wedding going on at the park, just walked on over there, and made myself a plate of food
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  2. #2962 The Evil Thing, Jul 8, 2017
    Last edited: Jul 8, 2017
    Just loaded my one hitter through the mouth piece. Never done that before :rolleyes:I remember wondering why such a small bud was packing so tight as I loaded... Was packed so tight I couldn't blow it out of that mofo if I huffed and puffed like the big bad wolf. Good thing huffing and puffing still worked witg smoking the opposite end ;)

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  3. Once got stoned and went to Walmart and bought the Oreos thins. And not that fat ones

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  4. I got super high with a friend, walked home. It hit me hard in my room, and my dad ended up calling yelling about something. For some reason I could not talk, everything was backwards and he asked me the order of something because he needed it, and I probably corrected myself about 20 times over the course of a 30 minute phone call, and still got it wrong. Luckily my parents don't care haha.

    Never argue with an idiot, they drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
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  5. Ohh I got one
    The base I was stationed at a couple years ago had a bbq party one weekend. At that time I was addicted to presc meds and would mix them with alcohol. Anyways the party's 50 or so ft from a closed pre-school. I walk up to the fence and see tricycles, my friend is there too and long story short we "borrow" the tricycle. So I haven't smoked ganja yet that day, it turns midnight and my drunk buddy goes wandering into the forest. I smoke 2 joints and walk over to the gate I usually leave the base from. It's closed cause midnight, but there's a turnstyle thingy for ppl to leave the base but it's too small for the trike. I try throw this kiddy trike over a 10 ft fence with barbed wire at the top and it gets snagged. I hauled ass cause they got motion sensors and shit covering those fences
  6. Target tried checking out myself in the non-self counter.
  7. I've done this more times than you could imagine :laughing:
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  8. Tried to zoom in on a printed map like it was a iPad. Worst part was my gf saw the whole thing go down. Not my proudest moment....
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  9. Got my pizza outta the oven and it touches my arm. As a reflex I pull my arm back. The pizza lands upside down on the oven door. Next day next pizza and next burn Mark on my arm.

    Another time I was as stoned as I was drunk and walked across like 10 train tracks I'm on the last one and behind me a freight train comes through. If I'd been Ten seconds slower I'd be dead. Even dumber it took me a day to notice my luck.
  10. I'll give you bonus points if you have a video of you looking for your phone

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  11. Not really aloe, but on more than one occasion in school if we were in the computer lab, I'd touch the screen cuz I have a touchscreen laptop... once I was stoned and was trying to sign into Google and was like wtf it's not working. I called my teacher over for help and she was just like "Emma this is not a touch screen." Then we awkwardly stared at each other for about 2 minutes but it wasn't awkward for me cuz I was stoned. I just said oh and then touched the fucking screen again trying to get it to work

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  12. I do. Lol.

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  13. fucking a tomato
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  14. Driving home after picking up and getting choked full of bubble hash, I looked down at the clutch and thought, "What the hell is this for?"

    Forgot how to drive. :p

    BAM! Then I was back... Gear change. :smoke:
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  15. #2976 Dizzy, Dec 3, 2017
    Last edited: Dec 3, 2017
    Lol I've forgotten where I put the weed stash before and spent like an hour and a half looking for it :rolleyes:

    Also was not alone for this one but my husband and I where playing Gears Of war 4 and we were both high af and I go up to this skeleton sitting against the wall and say"is this guy still alive" ctfu we both looked at eachother and busted out laughing!

    Also been high while driving and got lost in my own neighborhood.

    Lol I could make a list.
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  16. I live in a college apartment complex and the parking situation here is horrible. My car was parked on the road right outside my building and I remembered we had street sweeping that night so I went out to move my car to one of the lots around the complex.

    Spent like 10-15 minutes just trying to find a spot to park my car. This is also a hilly area, so you cannot just simply look out your window and see your car. Next morning I woke up and totally had no idea where my car was, I thought someone had stolen it to be honest.

    Ended up finding it like 3 blocks away with a $25 ticket stuck under my wipers because apparently they were street sweeping that road too.
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  17. So I'm sitting in my room, almost pitch dark, right? It's like, 10PM and my TV is on playing music + black screen. So I get this great idea that I'm gonna go go browse reddit and laugh at the shitty weed stories, right? The fake ones. I look around for my phone and start to panic that I can't find it. I then proceed to dig into my pocket, take out my phone, and turn the flashlight on and start scanning my bed. A good ten seconds. Took me ten seconds to realize what the fuck I was doing. Best part is my mother saw the whole thing (door was open) and was sitting there laughing her ass off. Good times.
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  18. Several years ago I was crossing from El Paso to Juarez with wife and relatives and lots of personal stuff on trip to wife's family in Chihuhah. The Mexican border patrol guy asked for $20 and I got really bent out of shape telling him he gave his country a bad name because of his greed, etc., got red as hell and attracted a lot of attention. The Mexican patrol guy had a talk with my Mexican wife and she told me to lighten up, and another Border Patrol guy took over. I got real cooperative and gave him $5. There was even a Mexican grunt checking under the seats for drugs and weapons and found nothing.

    When we returned to the U.S. a few days later and I was cleaning out the car, found a joint that somebody (me or one of my doper friends) had dropped under the seat. If the Mexican border guys had found that I would still be the White Guy in the Juarez jail.
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  19. Asked my friend who was driving me if he could get me something to eat.

    Except I was alone staring at the TV in my basement. I had forgotten that I had been at home for almost an hour lol.
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