Depression sucks.

Discussion in 'General' started by InferiorZone, Jan 25, 2009.

  1. I really hate this. I don't know what to do anymore.
    My mind is driving me crazy and i don't know how to make it stop.
    I want to think positive, i want to be fucking happy for once.. but i can't make myself stop thinking this way.
    I've been prescribed depression medicine, but i never take them.. just because i'm not big on medicine.
    Plus i feel like a loser as is, i feel like i should be able to fix this problem myself.. i feel like i should be strong enough to at least do that..

    right?

    erm.

    Anyone have any past experiences with depression meds?
     
  2. Take the meds, if they don't work tell your doctor and get it changed until you find some that work.
     
  3. #3 DuKe420, Jan 25, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 25, 2009
    i was on Paxil, and it made me even more suicidal. Stupid quacks.



    ive been feeling the way you do for the past month or so. its terrible. i really do thnk about ending it, a lot. This has been a lonely time for me..
     
  4. i was on and off a bunch of different anti-depressants and mood stabilizers for my bipolar disorder in high school but after i left home at 18 and lost my health insurance, i couldn't afford the meds and therefore stopped taking them altogether.

    to be honest, i didn't like taking 11 pills a day, only to feel kinda subdued and not very much excited about anything. granted, i no longer got horribly depressed or suicidal but i never felt very happy either. just a boring in between at all hours. i really felt inhuman after a while.

    when i went off the meds, i kinda had a breakdown and got myself arrested but after being off meds and without any professional help for over a year, i've held together.

    however, i do need to get myself help once i have insurance again because i still have a lot of problems. what do i suggest? see a psychologist. not a psychiatrist. the latter will talk to you for 5 minutes and give you pills. the former will actually listen to you and talk to you for full sessions and then decide if meds are needed.
     
  5. I never took anti depressants, i just smoke cigs or bud to chill out. It may not be good for me but it works. All the best to you. I know how it is.... wish i knew the answer to cure it
     

  6. Thats exactly what I do. Cigs are bad for you and all, but they are my crutch..and I don't plan on growing too old anyway.
     
  7. #7 Androgenicx, Jan 26, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 26, 2009
    You can't solve problems of the mind with the mind.

    Your mind is where the problem is in the first place. You are identified with the rollercoaster, uncontrolled stream of thoughts, as we all are.

    The human condition: lost in thought.

    Some have it worse, and get depressed.

    Check this video out and pay attention to it and see if you don't realize profoundly something about your consciousness that you had no clue and will make you feel blind in retrospect.

    [ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n05YksIc4ps"]YouTube - Who are YOU?.m4v[/ame]

    A year and a half ago I was a highly socially phobic, misanthropic, suicidal, depressed person. I was so socially phobic I would hide under my bed when my roommate would have a party in our apartment. I was so misanthropic that I cursed at random people under my breath while walking around. Suicidal thoughts were in my head 20-30 times/day. I almost did it when everything suddenly changed.

    I discovered "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. It is a good contemporary book about understanding your own consciousness. Not your psychology, which involves nothing but your thoughts and what influences them, but your consciousness - which you will discover is NOT your thoughts - your thoughts are just fleeting things in the empty, silent, blissful, peaceful space of your consciousness. Through meditation, awareness practice, bud helps alot once you have initiated yourself into this path, immense, total liberation is possible.

    I am not even the same person I was then. Not only am I not depressed, I am the most socially unphobic, most unrepressed, undepressed, unmisanthropic life LOVING, EXPLOSIVE, person. All due to a simple shift in consciousness.

    We all suffer to some degree due to our thoughts. Nobody is truely happy, some people are just for the time being above their acceptable threshold of what they consider suffering. Compulsive thought makes you complete out of tune with reality. Thought is nothing but a minute conceptual fragmentation of what you think reality is in relativity to your own piss poor, highly limited experiences in life. And when you think, you project this fragmentation, and don't see reality for what it is - you see your own creation, your own highly limited concepts attempting to summarize an infinite, unsummarizable reality. Realizing the existence of this and that you are NOT your thoughts and that your identity is completely false is the first step in awakening. You will find alot of liberation and help with depression and anxiety from this. Keep working with it, and the more and more close you get to freeing yourself fully. "Nirvana" in Buddhism, "Moksha" in Indian spirituality, is the complete realization of the nature of existence, non-conceptually but experientially. It is not only freedom from depression, but all moments of existence are then realized as blissful and perfect. Even death is not the slightest of problems anymore.
     
  8. there are seritonon supliments you can take like 5-htp which really do help with mood i used to take it when i had some depression
     
  9. Great video man! + rep for that, but I dont agree or understand this statement.
     
  10. i've been depressed for about 5 months. its notin huge but still its not fun. I usually feel better once i get out of the house and smoke a cig and bud. my freinds always help me forget.
     
  11. If your own mind and thoughts are where the problem is in the first place, how will you make your thoughts and mind "better" by trying to use the very thing that you are trying to make better?

    If your having bad thoughts - this means that you are HAVING bad thoughts, not willing them, or else you would have stopped if you didn't like them, yes? How are you going to change these bad thoughts into good thoughts when you can't control thought in the first place?

    The only way is the clear light of unconditioned consciousness. When you, even momentarily, fall back into the space of thoughtless pure consciousness, this space automatically heals all that is "wrong" in your mind.
     
  12. It's common for depression medication to increase depression, and that's why it's important to tell your therapist immediately and ask for your meds to get changed. You have to look for what works best for you.
     
  13. #13 powrd, Jan 26, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 26, 2009
    Hey OP, list the mids that you have been prescribed.

    And I seriously think that psychedelics can help with longterm depression but you need to use your best judgement on whether or not you can handle it all. I know I was able to solve a lot of my self esteem and social problems with psychedelics.

    edit: op said "Plus i feel like a loser as is, i feel like i should be able to fix this problem myself.. i feel like i should be strong enough to at least do that..

    right?

    erm."

    I'm like you on this one, I always feel like I need to be self sufficient. But if you can't figure out what is causing this depression, you should seek help. Living depressed is not a life to live, I feel like I wasted some of the best years of my life because of depression.
     

  14. That's what i'm afraid of. I feel like i'm wasting my life with each day that passes..
    These negative thoughts are dragging me down, and not letting me live.
    I can't even remember what it feels like to be happy anymore.


    Ps -
    I've been prescribed
    prozac,
    lexapro,
    trazadone (for anxiety)
    and xanax at one point.


    - Also for the person who posted the video. I really found it inspiring. I think i'm going to look into buying that book. You had alot of intelligent things to say.. I feel like i could learn alot from you. Thanks for you're post.. I really hope can overcome this with what you said.
     
  15. It would help you I bet to live in the moment. Do what YOU want to do for an entire day and see if you still feel depressed. Take an entire day to think about why you're feeling this way.


    What brought on this depression? I know for me it was body image.
     
  16. i dont give a fuck what anybody says... ive been put on meds throughout my earlier years for shit like add adhd and all sorts of other fucked up shit and im telling you... nothing will cure everything better than weed. I finally realized after 6 years of taking these mood altering mind changing personality ruining pills that they do nothing but control the symptoms of your problems, they never actually cure it. call a suicide hotline, find someone you can trust on line, smoke a bunch of weed and talk to people about your problems, go to a psychologest, whatever you do, do not succumb to the pressure of taking these medications unless you really think that your life depends on it.
     
  17. I just been diagnosed depressed with anxiety during an emergency to the Dr. visit due to a panic attack and I haven't taken any of my meds except the Klonopin which helps me knock out at night and today which I decided to take my zoloft. I have yet to see a psychiatrist although I have to soon because I'm almost out of my klonopin.

    Depression sucks ass. I am not the same person I was two years ago. I was always with a smile on my face, always partying - maybe a bit too hard at times. Its nothing nowhere near as it was since - I've don't trust anyone, I don't talk to anyone except the people I have to deal with on an everyday basis. I would've thought since I have like no outside life things wouldve gotten better, instead, I'm suffering from anxiety/depression.
     
  18. I totally agree with you accept, weed has been making me mad edgy. Like, uncomfortable. I smoke with my dad and we be mad chill but... I don't know. Could it be because I'm depressed? It helps with my anxiety and it just makes me feel mad unfocused which is why I usually tend to smoke at night. I don't enjoy myself as much as I used to on weed. I stopped smoking for a minute and I just tried it again, for my anxiety and I was good money but I'm fighting this upper respiratory shit so I've laid off for a bit and I've been taking the pills.
     
  19. maybe its less depression and more depersonalization... look into it and see if you have some of the symptoms. have you ever done shrooms/acid?
     
  20. #20 Livingalife, Jan 26, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 26, 2009
    I use to be manic depressive. Like cry over depression and shit. I was prescribed prozac and was doing drugs at the same time like adderal,dxm and alcohol and weed on top of the prescription. Which is really bad for your mind. Then i got off the meds and it helped me alot. Like all the prozac did was make me happy for the day. It never cured my depression. I've dealt with depression man and trust me man that shit sucks. Don't worry. I feel as if everyone goes through it sometime. Just make yourself a better person. Try and eat healthier. Start reading books or even magazines. Lose some weight or join a gym. You can even do community service that might help you out. Your life is good you just don't realize it. Make it better. Make the best out of yourself. Even if its not what you consider the best. At least your doing something. Also don't buy into the whole "loser" bullshit. Thats just human nature. Humans all over the world have the mindset. Like being smarter and making the more money makes you a winner. Who gives a fuck about being a winner. Shit if you were born in the U.S. that makes you a winner. You can drop out of school and eat 3 meals a day no matter what. Also all the popular kids in your HS are either in jail or dealing with a bunch of bullshit by now. Anyway what it comes down to is just do something to make yourself happy. I use to be in ur shell but lot worse. Trust me I was really bad with depression. But I waited and dealt with it and now i'm out of that sate of my life. Things will transform (sry, tired of hearing the obama "change" word) and you'll be happy down the road no matter what. Thats how life is. It has its ups and downs. Jusst like the economy. I would advise you to also talk wiht your mom about your situation. My mom helped me with my depression big time when I talked to her about it.
     

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