Spastic rumors of lust given time to maranate can change the fate of a willing person on a rush of gold Sitting here undertaken the greatest defeat of my time will break my soul and hear of evermore things wont be the same they never will be the only thing left is just death plain no remorse death i bow and say a prayer and load the gun i pray that i wont be remebered for my talents and my achivements but for my own death the bringing of my own death not by another person or god but by me i see darkenss fade i see thunder clap i feel cold i feel rain i feel numbness the pain is gone yes but where have i gone ive cursed my self to eternal hate and damnation that will not destroy me but torture my soul for eternity but i say to that she had a chance to change me and i thought for the better mabey it was wrong telling her how i felt but i have no regrets mabey shell never understand this or this but a freind dosent put judgemental cost's over freindship to hell with it i deserve to die as a plan of a susprise attack on a soul is all in the making trap have i laied to entice this being to me never again will i fret because it has been done i can destory the being where it hurt the most the mind so you can stick your well laied plan up your well laied ass
Work on your structure. The theme is good and meaning very clear. It would just read a lot better if you set it up like a poem/lyrics and used spell check.