Dear Motion Picture Association - RE: Piracy.

Discussion in 'Movies' started by Renaldo, Mar 19, 2012.

  1. Dear Motion Picture Association of America,

    We all get it that you need to make millions of dollars off every movie you make so that you can keep your coke parties going.

    But killing the internet because some people are stealing your shit is going to make everyone resent you forever.

    So what if there was a way we could end this amicably to all sides?

    Just start financing all of your movies through advertising revenue.

    We know you do it already. What soda does Iron Man drink? What shoes does Will Smith wear? We know they pay you to put those products in your movies.

    Product placement can be very effective. More effective than random commercials run during random episodes of random TV shoes. The brand of car that the right character in the right movie drives has more impact than a random car commercial during a random episode of a random TV show that has nothing to do with a car.

    Movies put people into heightened emotional states. The phone that 007 relies on in his adventures is sure to be a big seller. People will see it as high tech and reliable. Something they know they can count on when they're locked in the villain's hollow volcano.

    So what if 1/2 way through the movie, we had a clear break from the storyline, and Q actually went through the real world features of 007's latest phone. He could also talk about the crazy 007 features of his latest car so it's not so obvious and actually ads something to the movie.

    Or maybe whoever makes his latest car will pay you to show how well it performs in the real world. Take all the movie goers on a 5 minute virtual test drive. How much would advertisers pay for something like that?

    Nobody will care if 1/2 way through the next American Pie movie, one of the cute little starlets tries to sell us Axe Body Spray. And since the commercials are not meant to be aired, they can be ratings appropriate. The starlet can show us exactly where she sprays it. R rated commercials! Genius!

    In some ways, it could actually ADD something to the movies - a much needed moment of levity, a sense of humor about itself, an appropriate moment for people to check their texts while at the same time you show them how much cooler the star's phone is. Genius!

    And you can time them so the audience is most emotionally susceptible. Something advertisers would kill for. The big chase scene ends, the audience is on the edge of their seats - BOOM! COMMERCIAL for a car! Genius!

    We don't mind. You can still charge us an appropriate ticket price.

    And most importantly, in the post-theatre part of the movie's life, you can stop being dicks about people sharing digital copies. Pirates would actually be distributing the advertising to more viewers for you. You could brag about how your latest movie did on Piratebay rather than trying to shut it down.

    People would love you rather than hate you.

    You could still sell DVDs. Some people might buy them so they have it there when they have the whim to watch it or because they just really like the movie and want to support it.

    But those of us with only a mild curiosity won't go to internet hell because we didn't want to pay $20 to see Transformers 5.

    Of course, it does mean breaking the illusion that movies are uncompromised art, but I'm pretty sure nobody still believes that illusion other than you.
  2. Shhhh everybody... Maybe I'd we ignore him he will go away

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