Damn Near Got Caught

So here I sit on a beautiful sunday. Picture this, mom's a pot nazi and I'm a stoner. She's at church and I wake up to an empty house.

Ok, so it's gorgeous out and I just bought a brand new grinder, nothing special, just a grinder, but hey, it works. So I've been excited to use it and all but With her home i can't smoke a j or spliff outside and hell no to my normal bathroom smoking routine, so with her gone I decide to roll a spliff for now and a few j's for after work tomorrow.

Well there I sit happily grinding and rollin' away... And nothing happened. Well at least not yet. After I had rolled 2 bugler j's with a rolling machine* and a spliff for now I waS debating on rolling another spliff for later, but instead I got high.

So i head outside to enjoy the sunshine and my pretty spliff. Well as it went I'm smoking getting high and the spliffs nearly gone maybe a hit or two left and I hear a car pull into the driveway. It's my mom and she's early because she went to the early service. I rip it hard smash it out toss it in the dumpster and freak out, what about my eyes? So i run inside to check em, they're clear, when all of a sudden I remember I left a unlit cig outside. No problem right? Wrong, with my mom being a pot nazi she'd figure it out quicker than house that I had been but to something. IT was then that I remeber my stash needed to still be stashed. So I fix that problem when I remember I left this big empty gallon bag out that my guy gave me the shit in. Turns out I already threw it away. So I run outside before she's outta her car and light it so I can casually walk up smoking a cig like nothings up.

I totally came like 3 seconds to disaster but averted it.

Now as I post this I'm happily high, stocked with munchies and sippin on a drink. Can this story have a better ending? I think not.

*I know rolling with a machine is a sin in some people's eyes but I have my reasons and it works for me. So don't hate, appreciate.