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court ordered drug testing questions

Discussion in 'Apprentice Marijuana Consumption' started by mojopin, Aug 20, 2010.

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  1. #1 mojopin, Aug 20, 2010
    i am new to the forum. so thanks to all the people who make this place possible. i hope im posting in the right place. im here cause i have some questions about court ordered drug testing. due to child custody. my ex knows i smoke. no where near my kids not on the weekends i have them. i keep it in a barn on some property i own miles away from my house. i am a recreational smoker. just a few times a month. .so i dont think i have a high thc build up

    my ex smoked with me multiple times. she asked me to quit once. and i did for a few months. she told me i was a prick and that i needed to start again. we were having problems at that point.
    and i though she might be trying to set me up. so she agreed to admit on a tape recorder that she smoked with me before and encouraged me to start back smoking cause i was a prick. so i have this cd if i need to use it in court

    now she uses the knowledge that i smoke to jerk my chain and make little threats. she never brought it up in the divorce proceedings though. and i dont think she would want to give up her free weekends of getting legally smashed.

    ive spoke to my lawyers they both told me i could be pulled back in to court and would have to take a drug test if she wanted to. my question is do you have to take a test that day. or do they schedule you a appointment. at a lab. im sure i would at least have a week i dont think they drag you in off the streets they gotta give you some notice so i would think at the minimum i would have one or two weeks before the test.

    and what type do most courts use. hair urine, saliva blood etc. im in oklahoma to be exact. and what is the be all end all products/method for passing drug test. recommendations or links please. i make a good living. i could fight her in court all day long until i broke her. and worse case i was told would be supervised visitation until i passed the test. i have a totally clean record never arrested. i havent had a ticket in 10 years. (knock on wood) sorry for the novel. im just nervous about this, and want to have plenty of the top detox products on hand. and to know what lies in store again thanks to all
     
  2. #2 TeH purpz, Aug 20, 2010
    Good detox is drinking lots of water and green tea there are also alot of detox drinks and foods out there so buy some of the drinks eat normally and just drink water, green tea and the chosen detox drink for a few days and then dont smoke again until your drug test is up :)
     
  3. #3 We Here, Aug 20, 2010
    Jesus man, Bitches need to realize that kids need their fathers. How long has it been since you last toked? As for detox drinks you can go into your local headshop and they have an array of different drinks to choose from. Be cautious though that not all of them are guarantied to work, some dilute the test. Welcome to the forums, you'll find that they're quite nice to browse.:wave:
     
  4. #4 oldskoolgrower, Aug 20, 2010
    Stop smoking completely until the case is settled. It's for your kids.
     
  5. #5 mojopin, Aug 20, 2010
    nothing has been started. no court order whatsoever. i have not been contacted and she really don't have the cash i dont think. i just want to be ready if and when it ever goes down. i think these are just threats. and i am wanting to know what most courts order you to do. hair blood etc. im 80% sure she's just pulling my chain. just to ruin my day. like i said i may smoke 3 or 4 times a month. she wouldn't want me out of the picture. she wouldn't get to party etc go shopping she would be stuck with the kids. she just uses the kids to get to me because im happily divorced. thats all do courts make you piss or hair test or what
     
  6. #6 We Here, Aug 21, 2010
    Piss tests.
     
  7. #7 iDontSmokeBlunt, Aug 21, 2010
    I agree with Oldskool.

    It doesn't really matter what she wants, if the court finds out you use cannabis you could lose your kids.

    Just stop smoking, or sue her for full custody or something if you think you have a good case.
     
  8. #8 Chronner420, Aug 21, 2010
    Agreed. Your kids or your afternoon joint, you decide.
     
  9. #9 mojopin, Sep 2, 2010
    well i have not smoked in a week. tonight my ex said to expect to be contacted by her lawyer. so im in a fucking jam. what do i need to do here guys product for hair piss and total detox recomendations would be great. im not asking you to advertise for a product. if its in a week then im getting a pissinator/whizzinator type product if its a piss test. i have researched some. but i dont got the time i need to make a overnight order tomorrow or friday. so please help.
     
  10. #10 IHitKush, Sep 2, 2010
    I don't know any specific detox products that you can use but in the meanwhile you should stop smoking, maybe workout? But definitely drink lots of water.
     
  11. #11 mojopin, Sep 2, 2010

    yes i have quit for a week now. i workout everyday. and im not a everyday smoker so. i dont know i dont fucking care. i lose my kids then i will just hit the road. im a good parent. what sucks is im the one providing for them taking them to the doctor etc. i own my own business so i can do whatever whenever. she works a gov job and its not so flexible so i dont know. in the words of the 13th floor elevators these fuckers are gonna miss me when im gone. i will sell my business go to costa rica find me a chica and start over.

    p.s. since i quit smoking ive started drinking scotch and im about like clint eastwood in the unforgiven when i drink. thanks
     
  12. #12 DRTYDUB21, Sep 2, 2010
    Do you know the type of drug test they would give you? In this area, court ordered drug test with no criminal charge associated, would be an unsupervised lab urine test. If you have that, just get some synthetic urine on line, and prepare it when necessary, you can keep a bottle at temp tuck away on your person for about an hour, or use hand warmers and you have a bit more time. GL, hope it all works out for you man..
     
  13. #13 mojopin, Sep 2, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 2, 2010
    yeah im gonna get a fake cock and some synth urine for sure. maybe my next gal will also get some use out of it also. cant go wrong huh.(ill crank up i belive i can fly and do my best r. kelly) i think ive got this figured out.

    tomorrow im going to have my lawyer file a motion to request me to move to another state this takes a 60 day approval period. any bullshit she pulls in this time frame i can say is malice due to my decision to relocate.

    my old man always said it don't matter who throws the first punch in a fight. the first person who calls the cops is the winner. so on day 55 i can change my mind. i haven't passed the bar but i know a little bit. i got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one. HIT ME
     
  14. #14 ZipLockBag, Sep 2, 2010
    I wouldn't worry about detox or fake cocks or anything like that to pass a piss test if you smoke 3/4 times a month. If you smoke 3/4 times a month, and have already stopped smoking you should be clean by the time you get tested. Or atleast will have very very low levels.
     
  15. #15 Cynikal, Sep 2, 2010
    • Take antioxidants and multivitamins
    • Drink alot of Water (avoid soda)
    • Wear alot of shirts and start jogging/ running to sweat hard
    • Don't eat any fatty foods, go on a veggie diet for awhile (shitting out greens + thc molecules)
     
  16. #16 mojopin, Sep 2, 2010

    cool im pretty much there. i got a food steamer and a badass home gym and work out every day. ill cut out the soda.
     
  17. #17 poooops, Sep 2, 2010
    you could try

    kids
    _____

    pot

    not worth the risk or the hassle dude
     
  18. #18 Cynikal, Sep 2, 2010
    You also got to maintain your salt levels, gatorade does help. There has to be balance.
    But you should be getting some salt from salads if you use dressing.
    Or those oil stuff most of that shit contains sodium, because when you sweat you lose salt.

    Just throw a gatorade / powerade in the mix. The reason for cutting back on sodas is because the glucose.
    Glucose turns into fatty acid, and you don't want more fat in your body for thc molecules to attatch to.

    As for caffiene it's a stimulant, I had this theory that stimulant use could speed up the bodies CNS thus eliminating fat much quicker and expelling the bodies left over molecules.

    If you need that extra boost in your exercise routine maybe some caffiene could help, but becareful on that stuff, because you end up stressing your heart to it's limits.
    It's not worth dying over, just keep up the daily routine and you should be able to sweat out the thc molecules from the fat cells and piss it out and shit it out.

    Maybe get some fiber in your diet aswell to aid.
     
  19. #19 mojopin, Sep 2, 2010

    yeah im with you im done smoking. im just afraid if this pops up quick. im gonna drink the good scotch and die at 50
     
  20. #20 mojopin, Sep 2, 2010
    really i dont want to sound like a douche. my kids are my life. my ex uses them like bullets and poker chips. i would never do that shit. im done smoking. its just who likes to be held hostage. i mean this woman is getting smashed at bars weekly. the problem is i dont give a shit about her and shes psycho obsessed with me. i know this is off topic. but i just dont want yall thinking i think smoking is more important than my kids. i know i may have came off that way. im just defiant. ive finally let that shit go. i aint gonna be beat. if you aint cheatin you aint winning
     
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