What is truth? The impulse to express that which is real. To be that which is real - alone and in the world. Therefore truth is nothing more (and that nothing is infinite in its depth and potential, and possibility ultimately) than authenticity. With others. And with yourself in your silence, fear and vulnerability. When you want to say and don't know what to say, that knot is you and your fear and separation - the heavy dust of inertia that this dimension is (was) covered in. That bully in school that you wanted to speak against as you saw him beat another student. That statement you wanted to make 'I am', in the face of your father humiliating and overshadowing you when your spirit was about to take flight in youth - and he or she crushed it with his brand of 'reality', which is the sum of his life, his conditionings, and his fears. That girl you wanted to talk to but had no idea how to, and your own personal fear of rejection and of humiliation and judgement kept you silent. A silence that buried your soul in a vicious hell. In inertia. Made it less than it was. Temporarily. I am here to say that that authenticity is supreme, and to follow it, our supreme cause. There is nothing else. Instead you asked the girl out in a roundabout way. You sent her a note. You pulled her hair and humiliated her in front of her friends because that now suppressed, authentic, innocent self is becoming corrupted - perverted. It is finding other ways to express its energy, and it is inherently and completely ugly and false. And you know it. Gutlessness crushed your courage, oversensitivity and lack of grounding in yourself and standing up for what is real - in the world and around you - marred your soul. You have no one to blame but yourself. You knew the truth of the spirit that raged within you, yet you said nothing. And it is YOU that will rise one day from the depths of this stupidity. A new force, a burning consciousness, a growing light. Burning the eyes of the false, literally and figuratively. That time you just wanted to jump into the pool at the high school pool party (before somebody else did it). Or to dance when nobody was dancing, as the spirit of music consumed you and reminded you of where you were from and how far you have gone away from it. That is it! Your chance! To clear those foggy, murky waters again. To feel spirit fill the room again like you know is inside you. Not to be forever ambling about in self doubt self pity and stupidity. Your entire being wanted to plunge inexplicably into the depth of those waters. With your clothes on. It scared you. What is it? Am I crazy? Why do I have this crazy impulse to jump in the pool clothed, or to shout in the middle of a sleeping train, or to punch that guy in the face that has it coming to him and nobody wants to do the dirty work. So you call him a pussy behind friendly lines. perverting your impulse to set things right around you, perverting the male force inside of you that wants to express. Why this impulse, why is it always there? To jump. Into the ocean. To shout. Amidst people. To laugh in splits in the church. Because it is truly you. That freedom. That cleanliness. That moment to moment authenticity. So potentially lost in it that you don't remember what it means to be inauthentic any more. It is a battle within you- between that which is true and that which is false. They call you crazy. They pile on the heavy load they pile on everyone. You sink beneath it. Don't sink. Jump! Jump! Jump!
To live. What does it mean to be truly alive? Can you feel the fibers of your being? Maybe its a dampened smoke now. But can you feel it. can you follow it. its impulse. Here, now, around you, through you. Yet not yours. Just individual expression. the expression of the individual, yet not of his consciousness in itself. Response to the moment, not a reaction. There is no meditation, no practice, no teaching, no teacher that can take your hand through this. This test is yours alone. It is not a test! It is not a joke. it is important. it is true. it is the only truth. and you know it. wake up
and the last word is the velocity. Oh it consumes you. The velocity. The force of spirit. Burning the unconscious around it. Truth shines
Brilliant. I really loved that. I can feel myself far more likely to do so just as a result of this post.
what amazes me about this board is that people get me. nowhere else can i post and know it has hit home somewhere somehow. that feeling invokes gratitude itself. Thank you people