Hey guys, I can use some advice on the situation. I've been with my girlfriend for around 4ish months, and things just really aren't working out. We don't get to see eachother as often as she and I would like, and it's not even worth it anymore to me. The thing is though, she's pretty much deeply in love with me. She's a really nice girl, and I don't want to be a dick about this at all. However, I won't be able to see her until next week, and I don't think I can have the heart to do it in person. I'm not trying to be a coward, but it's also too far away, and I can't handle the tears that will follow. Is it wrong to do it over the phone? I don't want to sound disrespectful, and I pretty much have it all planned out regarding what I'm going to say to her. Will it really be that big of an issue to do it over the phone? Thanks for any comments.
I appreciate what you have to say, but since we see eachother so rarely, we only usually see each other at one of our homes. If I do it in my home, what do i do? Kick her out after? I really don't want to be a dick about this, but I think the phone idea is my best option.
You should do it in person. With that said, distance is an issue. So I think in this case you have a phone pass. I would. Make sure to let her know you had all intentions of doing it in person...but...
Meet her for food, not in a home. Casually eat, and as you are finishing... break the bad news, and pay for the check. Worst comes to worse, you get water/drink thrown on you, if she is a bitch and doesnt respect the fact its your relationship too, or you will both hug with tears in your eyes, and walk different ways while reflecting on the relationship, and it will be over..... Course a bunch of other shit could happen, but if you dont act like a dick or anything, it should end up going well, for the situation
Thanks DirtyApe. That was one of my main starting points of the conversation. I was going to explain that I would rather have done it in person, but there's no way for that to happen for atleast another week, and I really can't wait that long. I don't want to lie about my emotions when she tells me she loves me every night.. like what am I supposed to say back if I don't mean it? :/ Also please take not that this isn't the most serious of relationships, we really only see eachother like once a week or so.
If she is "deeply in love with you" this opinion is one sided, just an fyi. Shes going to turn the idea over in her head 1000 times that you had time to see her when dating, but not time to courteously break up with her in person.... Time is trivial, i personally think the phone game is pretty weak unless its not physically possible for you to see eachother, like, a plane ride, or even, a big ocean in between you... IF its "a little out of the way" its not a huge deal.... i consider a few hours of driving, a little out of the way, for someone who is deeply in love with you.... just my 2 cents though
Thanks Sirsog I really appreciate your input. However, maybe I used deeply in love the wrong way. I don't think deeply in love is the correct way to describe a 3-4 month relationship. She deffinetly thinks it's more serious than I do though.
Haha well that changes it a bit.... I'm still more of an old school method type of person, i would ask her out to lunch lol... but it is only 3-4 months.... so, its a coin toss
if distance is too far then just do it on the phone, but keep in mind that she will tell all her friends how much of a dick you are for that... good luck
Personally I would never of broken up with a woman over the phone. That just seems like the less manly way to do it, but that's just me.
^^Its so crazy it just might work...... I agree with the rest of the fellas, do it in person, but in your situation, I think the phone is a fair option. That way niether of you are out of gas or anything. Had a job fire me over the phone once. It was a pussy ass situation, but i didnt have to drive in to hear their bullshit. Haha. They did wake me up tho. Bastards.