Today, the Bournemouth Police raided the Dutch Experience 2 coffeeshop, after ignoring it for almost 3 weeks. The raid was well planned, but no persons were arrested for possession of cannabis, even after thorough investigation by the motivated officers. The police decided to go for the only possibility to gather eveidence, by arresting the DE's outhouse, a chemical Loo.... The shit and piss mixed in there will be carefully examined for the presence of THC traces, as the police expect that the visitors of the DE dropped their high profile DNA in there. The Bournemouth Police will ask the whole population of the South-East of England to cooperate in a DNA test, in order to identify the pisheads and shitfaces that smoked weed in the DE2. So far, there is no news from the person present in the loo on its arrest, he must be in deep shit ! The Police expect a shitload of arrests, after all lab-tests, as Commander Sjitforbrain stated on the BBC news, live from the crimescene, while holding his nostrils shut. Jimmy Ward, the founder of the Dutch Experience in Bournemouth, is clearly pissed off, he says he claims his personal terds back, for emotional reasons. "The labtest will show no results", explains Jimmy Ward, " I throw a bottle of Zydot in the pot every day, wich will make the material in there THC traces free." The Bournemouth Police Lab workers will be doing overtime, the Police wants Justice to be done fast and firm. Everybody in the area can send in his shit and/or piss to the Bournemouth police station, in a well closed jar, with the addition: To the loo! Those who refuse to cooperate will have their toilets confiscated. I think we have not yet smelled the last dropping in this event. Cono Hooper, reporter for the Poopcity Herald.