be honest: am I loser in your opinion?

Discussion in 'General' started by dickens cider, Jan 27, 2010.

  1. I'm 25. After countless hours of soul-searching, I just decided to switch my major to computer science. So now I'll be in undergraduate college full-time till 27, maybe 28. Leading up to now and continuing on in the foreseeable future, my only jobs have been part-time retail and fast food to support my time in academia. I haven't traveled much. I'm in great shape. I have no money, but I'm self-sufficient. I'm semi-happy.

    Based on this brief synopsis of where I am and what I'm done, I just feel like a fucking loser. I see people way dumber than me doing all sorts of interesting things, and I just feel like I haven't done shit with myself and my life. I don't have any monetary rewards at all, and I haven't traveled to any interesting places. I live in a town and a climate that I'm OK with, but the truth is that I need to stay here to finish my degree. I can't leave.

    I know it could be worse, and I hear you (before it's even said) that there is more to life than money. It's just that I go to school with 18-21 year olds, or adults who have real jobs and real careers and so on, while I'm working with teenagers at food joints.

    Would you consider me a loser, in your honest opinion?
  2. I think if you're doing your best and you're trying, then you're far from a loser.
    I'm sure in the future, good things will come that make you a real life winnerrrrr!
  3. If you're TRULY supporting yourself, then you're not a loser, just indecisive. Though you need to finish that degree before 30 or things might change...

    On the other hand if you're only semi-supporting yourself while amassing loads of student loan debt, or if you're depending on parents to make most of the tuition payments, that's a totally different story.

    I'm only inclined to believe this might be the case because full-time undergraduate work usually costs $5,000-$10,000/yr at the least expensive places, and on top of annual living expenses, it would be VERY hard to swing with only part-time work and no outside loans/help.
  4. No doubt. I should have added an addendum: I have 40 grand in student loans, and I'll have 60 grand in student loans by the time I graduate.

    It's not pretty, but it's honest. In terms of money from the folks, I don't ask for it, and everything I've borrowed I've payed back in full.
  5. No dude; you're doing w/ your life then I am. I haven't even left the quad-county area in over 8 years. Hell, the last time I was even in Lewiston was October of 2009. So I haven't even left 2 counties for over a year, (and frankly I see no need to). I'm unemployed, but even when I was employed, (groundskeeper for 19 months), I still didn't go out any more then nessecary to survive. Now, since being unemployed, I make my required job contacts every week, but beyond that, I don't go anywhere except for the grocery store, the gas station, and my father's house to visit him. (I get home delivery for MJ from my dealer, all I have to do is walk downstairs and pick it up).

    I have no social life, and to be honest, I really don't want one. 90% of my contact with the outside world is via the internet. I have 2 people I would consider a friend. One of them is 23yo, and the other one is 49yo. (I'll be 27 in july). I've been on precisely 2 dates in my life. One when I was 16, and one when I was 25) My first date we went and saw "Remember the Titans" and dinner. (TBO, the only reason I did it was because I won dinner and a movie off of a radio station, and needed somebody to go with). My second, (and last) date, I went fishing with the lady, (caught a sunfish), and watched south park on her computer. I honestly don't know if I'll ever go on another date. At this point in my life, I don't think I will. I'm still a virgin, and I'll probably die one too.

    I am obsessed with my computers, (I have 3 of them, and about to get a 4th in), 2 of my 3 computers are dedicated to running SETI@Home, and my primary desktop does when I'm not activly using it. I don't buy pre-made computers, nor contract out work on them. I biuld them myself, and if something is wrong with any of my machines, then I fix it myself. I don't trust anybody w/ my machines. They are my own creation. Nobody knows them better then I know them. Plus, I don't want anybody fucking up my machines that I've pretty much dedicated my life to keeping in optimum condition. God damn man, I sound as protective over my computers as a mother is over her child.

    I run a dual-side network. I have a secure side for my own devices, but I also run an unsecured WAP so I can share my unused bandwith with my neighbors. However, even on the unsecured section of my LAN, I still filter through OpenDNS, and all attempted violations of network security are automatically emailed to me in case I miss something on my router logs. I can, and have shut down MAC addresses from connecting to my network if they have repeatedly attempted to circumvent my network policies. Shit, it's my damned network, I'll do with it what I damned well please. I'm paying for the connection, not them.

    I'm on the computer between 18-24 hours a day. The internet is basically my life. I have this obsessive need to be indulged in multi-media. Right now as I speak, I am surfing the internet, and watching something on TV about black holes. If I'm not around my TV or computer, I listen to AM talk radio, and have my HTC Touch Pro (GSM), for instant internet access wherever I am. Yes, I am connected to the internet, (or at the minimum, have it available), 24/7. Honestly, I feel somewhat agitated if I don't have information going into my head for more then 20 miniutes at a time. Whenever I leave the house, I ALWAYS remember to bring my walkman and a spare battery. When my battery dies, I am back listening to the radio within 10 seconds. I can't stand silence, it makes me very uneasy.

    So now who's the loser?
  6. Being a loser in someone's eyes is pretty subjective. I would say that your situation doesn't make you loser though. Life is not a race. Most people think it is and they won't find out they love computer science until they are older and mid career (oops!).

    Don't be surprised if someone called you a loser, but just know that they are more than likely not to bright or at minimum luckily successful and just happen to be an asshole. These peoples values are probably cheap anyway.
  7. You're only a loser if you're not living life the way you want to. If going back to school is what will make you happy then do it and don't worry about what you look like. You said you haven't traveled much so get through school and then do that. Like I said, do whatever makes you happy.
  8. if you werent going to school i would say yes you are a loser but as it is you are preparing yourself for your future which is something every winner had to do.
  9. That's not really a problem then, but I'd REALLY try to keep the dept to 60g MAX, otherwise you're just shooting your future in the foot. You also NEED to finish that degree because 40k+ is going to be impossible to pay off without one.

    I've read stories of people with upwards of $100k in student debt while "finishing" their BAs, when you really shouldn't have that sort of debt unless you're getting a graduate degree.

    But, realistically, you're just making a good move, as 40-60k for a BA isn't too bad.
  10. You're in school, you're not a loser bro. If you weren't going to school and just worked flipping burgers, yes, you'd be a loser. If you weren't going to school, you'd have way more free time to get some kind of job making decent pay, such as factory work or whatever. You gotta make sacrifices to be in school and that's what you're doing.

    Just take it easy dude, if you're in school you're in a fine position. Eventually you'll be out and making awesome money, maybe stopping back to your old work to pick up a burger on your lunch break;)
  11. No. You are just trying to live your life and trying to make it better. You will become a "loser" if you stop trying in life. And besides, whats 60 g's. When i am done, i will have roughly 40-50 gs in debt, but hey, if you get a good job, then it won't matter!
  12. nah man youre no loser... Im doing alot worse than you are right now. I really dont think Im even cut out for college.

    You just do your thing, youll get it eventually, youre in school, so youre doing what you need to do man.
  13. you're a loser if you stop trying to better your life, which u are not. i know people that are your age that just have a mediocre job and still live at home with their parents and have no/little college education. hell, my best friends sis is like this lol
  14. Nope, you don't sound like a loser to me at all :)
  15. just handle your biz dont worry about what people think just do your own thang
  16. You're only a loser if you're unhappy with yourself and your life, and are not taking steps to improve. IMO.
  17. Not a loser at all, I expected to hear something pathetic when I opened this thread but it wasn't. You might just be feeling a little depressed because you haven't seen any real rewards from all your hard work yet.

    Few people are content with what they have achieved, especially in their early twenties. You have lots of time left.
  18. This alone makes you not a loser.
  19. WOW! really?
  20. nope as long as your alive its another day to live and be the person you want to be if you give up on being alive then your a loser if life gives up on you then you were too good for this world anyway :D

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