Awkward moments in sex

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by ebola weed, Mar 25, 2012.

  1. I've had plenty of awkward moments during sex.. mostly when im drunk.. well anyways on wednesday night i went to a party but i got there wicked late because i was coming from this ultimate burn session with a few buddies. when i was leaving, i askedfor a condom for the night.. and one of my buddies gave me his fire and ice condom.

    well anyways i knew i was going to get laid when i got there so i just tore ruit up with this random kid i met. i got like 6 beers deep and everyone was tired and went to bed or left so i was kinda like wtf im not gonna go to bed sober.. i drank the rest of my 12 while watching blue mountain state on netflix lol. after that i crawled into bed with this girl. i woke her up when i got in the room on purpose by slamming the door. i then proceeded to drop trow and got into bed with her.

    i started kissing her and then we started that groping shit. it was like a 15 minute process from initial contact to pants off. well i bent her over and got my pants, grabbed my condom, and put it on. it didnt feel so bad at first. i went in and went at it for like, 5 minutes.

    all the sudden my dick is fuckin frozen. its like trojan took a regular condom and lathered it in icy hot, fucking horrible idea. so im trying to champ through it and the girl tells me im hurting her.. im kinda like THANK GOD cuz i thought i was about to lose feeling in my dick. I rip the condom off and i tell her my dick has no feeling. she tells me shes going to bed so i follow. my alarm goes off at 545 and i wake my homie up, we leave, i tell him, he laughs and buys me an ice coffee. then we went to the ocean and i bought a new bong. irrelevant i know just wanted to share.

    tl;dr went to a party, got drunk, banged a girl with a fire and ice, dick felt frozen, left.
  2. Slamming the door on purpose?? *Adds to notes for future use*
  3. I am the professor of getting laid.
  4. ^Apparently!
  5. Undress, eat out girlfriend successfully, approach for kissing and insertion..."can we stop im not feeling it".

    Fucking cunt.
  6. Blue Mountain State is the sickest t.v. show ever. im pissed they canceled it. But overall sounds like a sweet night. minus the frozen part i guess. But still awesome at the same time..
  7. Well, I wont be buying those condoms....

    I got one for you. I was having sex with my ex a long time ago and we decided to give anal a go. She wanted to be in control though so she went on top, unannounced to me that she faints when she feels pain. Just as I pop in the lights went out and she headed straight for the floor, making sure her face stopped by the top of the dresser first.

    Classic case of naked girl on the ground syndrome. I felt bad until she started snoring like some sort of devil spawn.
  8. That would probably be her body trying to breathe after becoming unconscious and smacking her face on the dresser.
  9. I would have to say the most fucked up thing to happen to me sexually is when i was getting head. Maybe i was too rough maybe she was a bitch, all i know is she didnt tell me and when i was done there was vomit on the couch. Happened twice in my life........:eek:
  10. It's awkward afterwards when they don't want to leave.

    It's awkward/annoying when she sucks at having sex and all she can think of is missionary. God I hate that.
  11. missionary? fuck that noise
  12. Just once when i was eating a girl out, i blew out and it made a farting noise in her vagina, haha, i still laugh at that

  13. That's what Im saying. I'll just be like, okay..but don't expect to get off before me. lol
  14. Shouting out mom or your moms name
  15. Queefing can sometimes be
  16. wtf I thought tore it up meant somethin different.
  17. One time this bitch woke up right when I put it in... soooo awkward

  18. if she's not crying for it then you're doing it wrong!
  19. That sounds like rape lol..
  20. everytime i have sex

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