Awake? Chill...

I know it's only like 10pm in Cali or w/e, but it's 1am on the east coast, so I'm wondering who's up and chillin. I got done with my day today with the family (this). I'm already sore from the hiking, nothing a couple Js cant fix... when I get some. Smoked the rest of my half up, and got smoked up by a female friend with her new bowl, she has good taste in glass. I took another 20mg XR Adderall sometime around 10:30pm, and I haven't decided if I'm going to sleep tonight, or take the other addy I have and just finish this half-assed "binge" (wasn't attempting one, but I've been up for a long time poppin Addys to stay up) off and then sleep for 24 hours... decision decisions. (warning: I start to rant and ramble here)

I gotta slow down on the benzos, though, and slow my roll with the addys before they get out of hand. It's been benzos every day, and adderall in bursts every few days ill take it for a few days. I don't want to get to the point where if I were to stop taking my klonopin outta nowhere I would be risking death... no sir, don't wanna go there.

I'm trying to get an Adderall script instead of my Klonopin because it helps me 50x more at least. Klonopin makes me not care as much, just makes me more apathetic, but I still get restless and all this other shit I don't want to explain... I feel tired all day and dragged out, almost feeling like a zombie. If you watched me in my place, you'll see me half-walk into a wall when going into a different room, my entire right side or at least my shoulder will bump the wall because im just walking so... lazily or I don't know how to explain it.

The Adderall gives me confidence, helps me be more sociable... Gives me the will to be productive and get things accomplished. The most important thing is it gives me motivation, which I've never had in my life... but this is a start, it helps.

So... now to get the script. It took 7 months or so to get my Klonopin script, my psych thinks I'm still smoking bud (duh) and that I abuse the Klonopin (not really actually, I take it as prescribed most of the time). He won't even ask me if I'm abusing them or drug test me, he goes to my psychologist and has him ask me... heh.

So yeah, should be fun convincing a doctor that I need Adderall instead of Klonopin (two largely abused drugs, both controlled substances) because it helps, when I'm just going to come off as an addict looking for a fix to them because they have that dead set in their mind already before they even meet me.

Anyways, sorry to turn this into my rant thread.... I could keep going, but I realized how far into it I was getting and I had to stop myself... I probably won't be sleeping tonight, if any of ya have AIM, message me: tripstar420

Peace
theVirtuoso

 

biiig edit, it's a rant to warn haha... damn addys hehe. I posted my AIM there, feel free to message me.