So I'm easing myself back into smoking after battling generalized anxiety disorder for almost 3 years. It's like I'm having to retrain my mind and body that when I'm high, nothing is wrong. I've been under lots of stress the last few days and haven't smoked much at all. So I just laid on my bed, put on some Psychedelic tribal shit and took 2 really big hits of green crack out of my pipe. I immediately knew I was in for a ride because I haven't hit this pipe nearly that hard yet. Sure enough not even a minute after smoking, this shit hit me like a ton of bricks. What I'm battling currently is not letting the high overwhelm me and make me all anxious because I think my body and mind sort of confuse the high with anxiety. Anyways sure enough I started feeling a bit overwhelmed. That's when I made my mistake, I pulled out my heart rate monitor and took it and I really tensed up while I took it like I wasn't even breathing correctly and it was 112, just laying here in bed. That made me a bit nervous but I made myself relax and focus on my breathing and then I took it again and it was in the 90's, then high 80's, within 3 minutes of being 112. When this happens I try to tell myself that when I was 19-21 I used to smoke 10g a week and never had a bad experience until one day I had a panic attack. The panic attack started making me worry about my health and basically it turned into generalized anxiety disorder. What makes me feel like shit is if 2 big hits do this to me, how will I ever manage enjoying getting extremely baked like I used to? I used to fucking eat brownies all the time.