Apple juice passes drug test!

Hahaha. Fuckin right on man. Now I understand your just buying precious time.

 

She's not going to let you slide. She's not going to risk her job.

The shit gets sent off to a large lab where it is thoroughly tested. It's going to come back as not-human urine.

Story is so fake.

 

if this isn't a troll then i would stop smoking OP, youz bout ta get testes again

 

she knew she was being nice
happend to me once cept it was somethin more dope than thc

 

I took a poop in the cup once and it passed as piss.

 

my dealer uses warm apple juice to pass for parole all the time! This DOES work!

 

They probably think you have diabetus

 

Also putting Apple juice into a sprayer covers up smerky smells

 

that's so fucked. They test for amino acids and creatine. Along with temp. To make sure it's legit.

 

I call bs

 

No no no no no

 

Apple juice contains none of the metabolites present in urine.

Without these, they won't call you. They call you to verify a prescription if something hits positive, they do not call you when your sample comes back as not human specimen because there are no meds that cause that.

She didn't just let you slide because she'd be risking her job, her certification for administering drug screens, and risk the facilities certificate that allows them to do toxicological diagnostics.

If she just wrote down 90° that won't matter, the temperature strips (in attempt to be more tamper proof) have a design that shows (in the lab) if the 'cells' never activate as they wouldn't pouring a drink in that isn't mid 90s F.

Unless your employer recently switched with that facility and told them to start throwing UAs instead of oral screens, they aren't going to just randomly give you a more costly test.




Oh, and UAs are paneled toxicology screens, ie they're more geared for illicit substances and scheduled substances that are often abused. Oral screens are more geared for recent alcohol consumption or tobacco use.

No offense, but literally nothing you said fits any remotely likely scenario otherwise there are multiple employees waiting to be fired for improper procedures regarding chain of custody.


Source - paramedic X5 years; BSN X1 year; 1st year medical student.

 

here is what you should do if you ever find yourself in that position. Drink a fuck ton of water while you're there. As a mater of fact, just drink a fuck ton of water on the way there. Then you'll piss diluted but pass the temperature requirement. When they test it you'll show as diluted yet it will have urea in it. They will ask you to retake. You get about a week or two worth of breathing room. I did that very thing 2 or 3 different times. when I told the person on the other end of the phone who was reporting my diluted results that the tech at the testing facility had me drink water till I pissed, they had me retake it no issues.


I subbed urine for a synthetic kit for years on the job as a low voltage electrician with the local electricians Union. There were tons of piss tests there. I even kept a kit in my truck just in case. If the company is paying for a piss test, the urine in that test gets tested. So passing via subbing with apple juice is just not possible. No way some one is going to put their job on the line and break protocol. That ladies initials are on that sample of apple juice so when it comes back as Apple juice someone gets their ass handed to them. I call bullshit. Maybe 20 or 25 years ago you might maybe get by that way by luck and that's a big fucking maybe. It just isn't possible today.


It is just easier to lay off of whatever it is that's going to get you busted. There just isn't any clean way of cheating drug screens now a days. Best way I found was synthetic urine kits. If you have never used one before then buy two kits so you can dry run and see it all work. It will allow you to get a timed run of how long the synthetic urine will stay at temperature. I was able to keep it above 91*F for just under 2 hours. Synthetic kits shouldn't be over 6 months old or so. Look around online and do your home work. If you can get clean urine you could use that instead of the synthetic in the kit. Something to think about.


Later blades.....

 

Exactly! I'm on parole, and all tests are done in the lab, testing for creatine (makes sure it's human urine) and any other abnormalities in the urine! I call B.S on apple juice! Unless it's not lab tested.


Sent from a used tampon, launched from Mars...

 

wow, lol, lucky lucky. That was smart oo