you need to answer a few questions about this situation before you really know. 1, do they all know about each other 2, do they all know you sleep with the other partner 3, do they have a problem with that 4, do you sometimes have sex with more than one of them at the same time 5, can you easily say "sorry i had made plans with other chick to spend the night with her tonight" 6, is the relationship meaningful and substantial in different aspects and understood by each party involved. 7, are they fucking around with someone that you don't know about or at least they don't tell you about.
1) All but 1 2) All but 1 3) no 4) not recently, but in the past I had 3somes w/ 1 of em and her friend, back in my college days 5) yes 6) we all smoke weed together 7) one is married, one has a boyfriend, two are single. Only one of em doesn't know I'm messing w/ the others.
sir that is not a poly relationship. i don't even need to read the full answers to determine that. I'm going based off of some of your verbiage. "messing", "3somes", all of #6. If you consider what you do with them as messing around, then you obviously don't treat it as a relationship, especially when you just smoke weed together. its an immature way to view what you have. and don't correct me on that because i misunderstood, i know exactly what you really meant by that. a regular relationship is hard enough to maintain with one person. it takes a mature person to act appropriately to keep the relationship above water. it takes even more of a man/woman to keep the negative emotions (fear, jealousy, fear of jealousy, depression, confusion) apart from the situation when dealing with multiple people that all interact with each other on a regular basis. you don't have a poly relationship and i will bet you never will because you don't understand what it means to be in one. and its too bad because you are missing out. its fun and all to "mess around" with people when the others don't know, but its more rewarding to be able to switch partners and do quality things with them all separate and simultaneously.
Too jealous and picky about my partners to be in a poly relationship, but I can respect the people who make it work. Seems to me that people are usually wired to be monogamous emotionally, but not not sexually - if they were, we wouldn't have so many people cheating on their partners.
I never said it was easy balancing the feelings of two women at the same time in the same bed Jealousy has more to do with personal insecurities than fear in my eyes. I know my ladys love me. I have no fear of them leaving me. Thus I am not jealous of any other man. They now I love them and wouldnt leave them. They do not get jealous of each other because I love them equally. That squashes most jealousy issues right there.
How common is polyamory? I have next to no experience with relationships but I was thinking about polyamory a lot about a month ago and it seemed like it would be the right lifestyle for me.
Not very common unless you are in the right circles (Swingers, bi's, ect) A lot of people are too possessive and insecure to handle a relationship like that. Swingers tend to be a lot less possesive and much more open to a polyamorus relationship. If its just about sex - Stick to swinging. Being Poly is pretty complicated at times
I'm honest, trusting and accepting of who people are. I'm not a swinger. Reckon I'd find many people in the same boat?
one thing i have noticed with the swinger/poly crowd that i have seen is that most of the time they are not the type, physically, that you would think to have a poly lifestyle with. like they tend to not be super hot. sometimes just barely decent looking. character wise they are great people, some issues in the head but nothing that can't be dealt with. those issues are kinda why they support the poly lifestyle. also it happens that those issues they harbor make them gravitate to the types of people who use the poly life as a guise to just fuck around. and doing so the chicks get used and abused mentally, but the issues they have, like i said, makes them want that sort of thing. kinda like my daddy beat me as a kid, now i like it when guys beat me cuz i think thats how they show they love me. not that severe really but just a simile.