Am I making the right choice...

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by Dalton!, Jan 31, 2011.

  1. I just told my girlfriend that it isn't working and I was leaving our apartment...

    It's been rough for a while, I used to feel so in love with her. Now we fight, and I just donlt feel the same.. I wish I could, i've been trying..

    she loves me just as much as ever, wants to be with me for life, I just don't think I'm ready for this.. I'm only twenty, this was my first love..

    I don't know how I feel. I feel like a douchefagasshole for hurting her, and breaking her heart like this but I'm just not happy, we don't get along like we use te. At the same time I feel relieved...

    after two years, this...

    I don't know what I feel.
     
  2. Dude. 2 years. Maybe your just in a rough patch.

    Is thia the first chick youve been with or the only chick?

    Do you feel like you rushed into it?

    Either way you cant stick her with the apartment. Also id hope that after 2 years youve moved past the yelling. And arguing and moved on to grownup talk.
     

  3. It's just not the life I want, we don't really yell but both get pretty mad. Not the only girl I've been with, but only really significant relationship
     
  4. #4 Leesh, Jan 31, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 31, 2011
    Have you thought that maybe just not living together at the time would be better rather than quitting the whole relationship? Maybe you two rushed the living situation, not every serious relationship has to move in together so early in a relationship.

    In a sense it's a case of distance makes the heart grow fonder. When you are together it's easier to appreciate each others company and you spend less time looking at the negative things. Sometimes the only way to appreciate that time is you each have your own space.
     

  5. Yea that's the problem. I just need space. Ilm always with her, and I feel like she took it for granted. Maybe we can still be together, maybe not, I don't know what I want right now just need some time and space to figure this out
     
  6. Yes, you have to do what's best for you..
     
  7. Just don't forget to explain that to her, might giver her a few reality checks. I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't realize that you were being smothered, it happens so easily.
     

  8. Have you told her this? ^^^

    How long have you been living together? Living with someone can be very difficult at times. If you are used to having your own space, it can be very hard to adapt to having someone around all the time.

    No one else can answer your question for you. This is a decision that YOU have to make. If you feel that the two of you have discussed everything and there is no way to make things work then...

    You also have to ask yourself, do you want to make things work?

    When a relationship ends, someone is always going to get hurt. There is no way around it.
     

  9. I did, she admits that she was self centered or whatever, and wants to try to change.. I just don't know what I want
     
  10. Stay in the apartment together but leave each other alone. You know? Like talk and stuff but don't be together. Let the natural course of things happen from there. If it's not going to work then the reason for ending it will show up for real. Neither one of you will have to guess why and come up with a lame reason.
     
  11. #11 chicken, Jan 31, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 31, 2011



    im 42 and speak from a lot of experience,,,

    you dont want a chick to '' CHANGE'' FOR YOU,,,,

    then shes become something that isnt '' natrually'' her...shes what '' you'' want her to be,,,and that never works,,,

    [ THE PHRASE'' CANT TURN A HOE INTO A HOUSEWIFE } IS A GOOD EXAMPLE OF '' CHANGING SOMEONE '' THEY ARE ALLWAYS WHAT THEY ARE...... even though they '' act'' they way '' you '' want them to,

    ...my best advice to you dude is this ; YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DONT WANT RIGHT ?

    SO LEAVE,,,,,AND GO FIND WHAT YOU DO '' WANT''...{can i get a motherfuckin AMEN,,,UP IN HERE,,,AMEN BROTHA CHICKEN}

    ive tried to change 3 chicks in my life,, had 2 kids,, one with the first,,,one with the second,,,

    if a chick isnt what you want,,,,,then why '' hang around''

    ... my past experience;;;;; i gave my first wife a child,, because i thought i could change her,, by making her a mom,,,,she was a good person,,, just needed some '' changes''


    ive paid child support since 1998.... THINK REAL HARD,,, ON YOUR CHANGES,,,, SOME ARE COSTLY,,,

    dumbest thing i ever did,,, was to think i could '' change'' a woman:cool:
     
  12. it says i've given you too much rep..
     
  13. I'm in a pretty similar situation man. My girlfriend has her heart set on getting married and having kids with me, and I just don't know if that's what I want with my life. I used to think she was the one, but lately it seems like I'm falling out of love with her. I'm just not happy like I used to be with her. I know what you mean about feeling like a dickhead for hurting your girl. Fucking sucks. We agreed to give each other a little more space and see how it goes from there. I don't know though man, love has a nasty habit of disappearing overnight.
     

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