You see, there is a big difference between the normal and altered states for me, even though it is only a question of perception and energy. The first time i experienced it, it felt like a washing machine suddenly hitting the spin cycle at the end of the wash. Felt my vibration soar 'upwards' and stay there as long as i could sustain it. Once i'd had enough, or had gone as far as i could, it felt like the cycle coming to an end, and my vibration returning to normal. My normal had changed somewhat as a result, but it was still nowhere near where the altered had taken me. It allowed me to see I had to let go of my current reality and walk away, leave what had purported to be my life up to that point, and move into another reality, yet another country, to experience everything that was about to occur there.
i held on to that feeling as long as i could looked for it in everything feeling if i tried hard enough ...i could get there.... and i did.... only when i came back i found myself tied to a bed with no idea where i was
i am a psychotic and an anti psychotic stuck living together within this bag of rotting flesh........for as long as it takes
2...shit i have been up over 5000 but cannot get there from here the paths that do lead there do not lead here time is an illusion yet there is more of it between us then there is space between us
not if i can help it! i separated myself from that whole mess for a reason.... even if that reason is no longer clear to me there is much to be found alone united there is only distraction......and pretense...... to be united one had to pretend to belong i want no part of that game i do not belong i do not want to i like it out here alone
oh i have 2..... the one that i know... and the one that i do not know the later only visits when the former is out to lunch as we 2 cannot occupy together only one at a time.... what i want is "out!" yet when one is out two slips in what i will.....is a slippery slope with many destinations
even when every one is constantly thinking about change every moment in between? will there ever be a second hand i mean?
everyone who is "constantly thinking about change every moment in between" is always missing out on the moment at hand..... for the moment at hand is all we have by the time the second hand comes round... we are long gone from that moment entirely everyone who is "constantly thinking about change every moment in between" are living their lives second hand.......
Where I am is where I'll be, until I move, then I am there, but it is still here. Leaving makes it easier to stay, though. When I return, as much as I want to believe it is different, it is still the same, it just feels different.
Could you imagine it to be a sort of co-piloting?? I've heard of some that they experience an atypical type of brain functioning where people can simulatenously speak and think in two different languages. I'm not sure how that works, its amazing how the brain works even without basic understanding of the pathways that faciliate these functions yet i find it fascinating and strange of an ability which can leave them, the observer as a sort of co-pilot(ting) such a process. So, the speech may be forced for this to occur but it is not normal is how their speech reflects thought, its two different thoughts they are expressing and experiencing simultaneously, how odd is that? Seem it could relate somewhat to the process you've experienced , dingus? What way is this caused or how?
I would hope so because if you only experience them as two, then you don't experience them as one. I think we can because I feel I can so why couldn't we? I'm not sure if we ALL will, though. If you don't know your are low, then why would you try to be high?
music effects all my states....it doesnt even have to be music i am currently listening to for me to hear it for it to touch me -life of agony
I want to escape but experiencing all of my time seems the only way out. I can escape it sometimes if I try, but I know this to be reality and I keep returning to it, at the same moment in time. What this leaves me with is the present. Here is where wants and needs divide me. I want to believe in humanity but how can I if can't even unite myself? I can suspend myself in alignment, but I know it is synthetic and that the division is truth. There must be a way to unite. I will make it my goal in life to become united in life before I become so in death.
Sounds interesting.. heh. I'm a huge fan of neurology butI've never really read about anything like that. The closest I can think of is synthesesia but that's more off a subconscious sensual expression than just thinking. The odd thing about the human brain is in a way, we are two separate pilots. There's the autopilot(subconscious) and then there's the pilot(conscious awareness). 80% of everything we do is run by the subconscious, but what makes humans so intelligent is our frontal lobe that allows us to observe and question what the subconscious has to offer. Without this awareness, we'd just be on autopilot with no sense of self control. We'd simply be impulse, but we've evolved to question and "know" this impulse we call reality.