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it was the fucking police! "come out with your hands up"

i quickly rush to the toilet in panic flushing my drug supply down the toilet. it clogs.

*snap crackle pop* the fuckin pigs kicked in my door

*blllllllllllllaaaaaaaaat" they spray a machine gun at me as i dive behind my bead grabbing my uzi and also my magnum pistol .

i blast 3 motha fuckas and jump out my window behind me and run.

 

I get into my mustang and drive to my homie Will's pad.

 

Who has a helicopter and were gonna dip the fuck out to Brazil!

But on the way there a police helicopter found me!

 

"Hey, will! How's it going?"

Will Smith answers the door in a drunken stupor. "*****! Dat you?"

"Hell yeah. Was wondering if I could crash the pad for a minute."

"Cops again?"

"You know."

"Well you know it too bruh. Check it out, check out the goods bro!"

Will Smith invites you inside and slowly reveals a bundle from the back of his couch and begins to unravel it before you. . . . .

 

" u limp dick sonofa bitch is that all for me?"

" u damn skippy, bro"

 

We then proceed to blaze the fuck out of his living room.
We hear a knock on the door.
"It's gotta be the cops!" I proclaim

 

it turns out to be the secret documents the feds wanted, along with awesome guns

"i gotta go , im high as shit"

just as he says this ,will starts tweaking out

"take it and go!!!!11111"

"dude wtf"

will turns into a zombie and starts running towards me.

*bada bing bada booom* that fuckin zombies dead. and it aint the cops. its more fucking zombies! with guns/1

 

I shoot all the zombies.
Run to my car and drive to the airport where im scheduled to meet a pilot named theodore.

 

I arrive at the airport, barely making it on time.

It's empty!

"Theodore? theo where are you?"

I suddenly realize i've walked into another trap....

 

Dildo Ninjas attack me and all i have to defend myself from their devestation is.....

 

Two dildoes of my own, retrieved from the back pockets of my Levis. I swing them in a panic and knock down two of the ninjas.

 

I attempt to escape the airport.
But am thwarted by another pair of dildo ninjas.

 

"This is like spy kids finger ninjas, rated R!" I proclaim.

 

They then bow to me and say
"such a powerful statement deserves our respect"
I walk out the airport and see theodore.

 

my niqqa theo wussup

"sup player we goin to texas"

we get on the plane while we are bumping "the chronic"by dr dre.

as we are landing i see a girl with what looks like to be 3 tittys on her.

 

When a butt plug terrorist group tries to takeover the fuckin plane !

 

But she doesnt have three titties, just two DD's and a zipunder her shirt.
She greets us with...


EDIT:Im not changing my post, this guys post didnt make sense -.-

 

A plastic vagina

 

"do you have one?" we ask as i spark a blunt only to be told by theo that it was covered in lean!