AcknowLedgendary (For the Hip Hop Heads)

Discussion in 'The Musician in U' started by KrAyZiE BoNe 11, Jul 27, 2012.

  1. I wrote this up pretty quickly today and recording a rough copy. I have my own areas of concern and still need to master it but wanted other peoples opinions. Going to re-record when I'm perfectly happy with the track, (still need a hook too/maybe 3rd verse-if anyone's interested)I usually don't put much effort into my work, this is a first for me.


    phILLy- AcknowLedgendary by skillphillydaillone on SoundCloud - Create, record and share your sounds for free


    there was a time where everything was astonoshing
    the past was gone cuz the future looked promising
    dont tear when your heart gets weary
    don't fear when its all in theory

    nobody hears me, i still jot it down
    still ridin these lanes til i bottom out
    still toin these lines like im outta bounds
    still not makin any sense on these common grounds

    still goin thru the pain and the struggle
    life can change in a couple, it might
    bring rain in the rubble, flames to the hustle
    but you know i still play games in the puddles

    i wake up wonderin lookin at the world
    so different, I just feel so distant
    hype alone, writin poems in a lighter tone
    i remember when i first picked up the microphone

    i could never put it down like a fiend for crack
    it gave me a passion that I seemed to lack
    they said my sixteens and schemes were whack
    but since when is word of mouth deemed a fact?

    i didn't change, you just didn't know me
    if only my heart wasn't so damn lonely
    got it? good, stable as I should be
    i gotta leave the whats if's and could be's,

    ive been in overdrive tryin keepin hope alive
    flow it live dope like the coke inside a soda riiight
    i know you noticed but the focus isn't over
    i tend to bust it open if you lookin for the closure

    then you lookin at the wrong man, armed with the strong hand
    gotta flush like lebron jams, back to the song man

    sorry, but i've never been a rebel
    don't listen to the devil you'll be tryin to make it level
    and i made it uneven, but ya mans still breathen
    the fans been leavin but the plans been heated

    well at least the sun is still shining,
    and even today the funs still rhymin

    and you just wanna party after rest
    and i'm just doin lines til I cardiac arrest
    guady lookin fresh, you just party with the best
    actin naughty from marley n bacardi you feelin stressed

    sorry your a mess but who's partly to blame
    cuz we might have been a match but hardly a flame

    i'm breathen air, so I gotta be relevant
    Should I gain the whole world and lose my intelligence

     
  2. hahahahaaaaaa
    man this was so sick, except the vox are low i can understand but this should be heard
    keeep writing cause youre good man!

    I really llike the name you picked too, acknowledgendary, fuckin epic lol
     

  3. thanks for the good words, I'll take the vocal levels into consideration..And the name just came to me haha it's pretty ridiculous.
     
  4. love the beat, but it seems like your energy is lacking, your kinda monotonous in it, the lyrics were good but they could be delivered better i think, your flow is real mechincal, just like line for line, instead of flowin' the verse, with hardly any switch ups in it, play with the flow man, don't just recite words, spit that shit...

    its not bad, but i feel like you could make it so so much better
     

  5. Yea ita a rough draft if you read the first post and thanks for the criticism..the monotone style is kinda just what i do (nas, gangstarr type)
     
  6. lol this started playing when i plugged my phone into my car stereo earlier, vox were definitely louder but still distant feeling beat overpowered a bit, but the lyrics are impacting though and I was repping down the street!
     

  7. that's what i like to hear!
     
  8. bout to re-write and record shortly any other suggestions?
     
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