A broke-mans fleshlight

Discussion in 'General' started by HankMoody, Jul 10, 2011.

  1. So i am broke and cant afford a flesh light. Would a warm banana peel work, maybe a little butter for some lube?
     
  2. The garbage disposal works quite nicely.
     
  3. @Nukes1337 Lol gross.
     
  4. Do you have any pets?
     
  5. [​IMG]

    Anyone try to cut a hole into a grapefruit, warm it up a bit in the microwave and then do the deed?
     
  6. nothin beats good ol' fashion PUSSY.
     
  7. [​IMG]

    If you have a warm banana peel, that should be fine. Put it in the microwave a little if you are a sick fuck. I think if you put it in the microwave for a few seconds it'll do the trick, lube and all. Oh, but only do that if you are a horny motherfucker.
     
  8. a bottle of lubriderm and my left hand does the trick. Or i'll have my girlfriend come over and get some real pussy.
     
  9. just go in public and jerk it.:p
     
  10. Call a hooker.
     
  11. Pay a homeless person to jerk it off

    It's a win win situation, they get money and protein
     
  12. Rape.. i mean date.
     
  13. Go dig a hole as deep as your penis is in length, then fill it with a gelatine substance such as corn syrup. Then you should begin to thrust your pelvic region against the pit of gel. It feels like satin sheets being morphed into your penis, while Jenna Haze is tonguing your shaft.

    Rep me

    /thread
     

  14. Lemme help you out bro. How old are you? Under 25? Head over to the mall. Go chat up some ladies. Ask them if they like to smoke. Girls mouth=perfect fleshlight.

    Older then 25 then i don't really know where to meet girls. Just hit on chicks your age. Then fuck the shit out of them. I do this and have never had to buy a fleshlight.
     
  15. Cut open a squash; take out the seeds. Use a condom. Profit
     
  16. Give your grandma a roofie, go to town
     

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