101 reasons it's great to be a girl

Discussion in 'Grasscity Forum Humor' started by Superjoint, Oct 6, 2002.

  1. 1. Free drinks
    2. Free dinners
    3. Free lunches
    4. Free movies (you get the point)
    5. You can hug your friend without wondering if she thinks you're gay
    6. You can cry without pretending there's something in your contact
    7. You know the truth about whether size matters
    8. Speeding ticket? What's that?
    9. You can hug your friend without wondering if YOU'RE gay
    10. You actually get extra points for sitting on your butt watching sports
    11. You don't have to try to laugh louder, deeper and
    harder than your buddies
    12. If you never have a son, it's okay
    13. If you do have a son, and he's a lousy athlete, it's still okay
    14. If YOU'RE a lousy athlete, you don't have to question your
    worth as a human being
    15. A new lipstick gives you a whole new lease on life
    16. In high school, you never had to walk down the hall with your binder
    strategically positioned
    17. If you have sex with someone and don't call them the next day,
    It doesn't mean you're the devil
    18. You don't have to count how many people you've slept with
    19. Condoms make no significant difference in your enjoyment of sex
    20. If you have to be home in time for 90210, you can say so, out loud
    21. If you're not making enough money, you can blame the glass ceiling
    22. You can sleep your way to the top
    23. You can sue for sexual harassment
    24. You can sue the President for sexual harassment
    25. If you're not very attractive, you can fool 'em with makeup
    26. If you use self-tanner, it doesn't necessarily mean you're a big loser
    27. Same with tanning beds
    28. Nothing crucial can be cut off with one clean sweep
    29. You could possibly live your whole life without ever
    taking a group shower
    30. No fashion faux pas you make could rival the Speedo
    31. If you're pregnant, YOU get to decide what to do about it
    32. Brad Pitt
    33. You don't have to fart to amuse yourself
    34. If you cheat on your spouse, people assume it's because you're
    being emotionally neglected
    35. YOU never have to wonder if your orgasm was real
    36. You'll never have to decide where to hide your nose-hair clipper
    37. When you take off your shoes, nobody passes out
    38. If the person you're dating is much better at something than you are,
    you don't have to break up with them
    39. If you think the person your dating really likes you,
    you don't have to break up with them
    40. Excitement is only as far away as the nearest drug/beauty-supply store
    41. If you don't shave, no one will know
    42. You can congratulate your teammate without ever touching her ass
    43. If you have a zit, you can conceal it
    44. You don't have to reach down every so often to make
    sure you privates are still there
    45. If you want to have sex, you always can
    46. If you're dumb, some people will find it cute
    47. You don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in
    48. If you love someone, it's easy for you to tell them
    49. You can dress yourself
    50. Your hair is yours to keep
    51. If you ARE bald, people will think you did it on purpose,
    and you're really chic
    52. Once a month, you have an excuse to be a total bitch
    53. You don't need a special occasion to hug your dad
    54. You never have to wonder if you'll offend somone by
    opening the door for them
    55. When necessary, you can live without sex
    56. You can always get a ride hitch-hiking
    57. You don't have to pretend to like cigars
    58. You don't have to pretend you liked cigars before they were cool
    59. You'll never have to blow 2 months salary on anything
    60. You can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to
    picture them naked
    61. If you marry someone 20 years younger, you're aware that
    you look like an idiot
    62. You don't think that wearing a warm coat in the dead of winter
    makes you look like a wuss
    63. You'll never lose your voice from screaming at the TV
    64. If you wear cologne, you don't have to pretend it's aftershave
    65. You'll probably never see someone you know
    while peeing in an alley
    66. You never have to punch a hole through anything with your fist
    67. You don't have a scar right under your chin
    68. You and your friends don't have to get totally wasted in
    order to share your feelings
    69. If you talk to your mom every day, it's normal
    70. If you pick up the check once in a while, that's plenty
    71. Sitting and watching people is all the entertainment you need
    72. You can quickly end any fight simply by crying
    73. You can decide not to work once you've had kids
    74. Your friend won't think you're weird when you ask
    if there's spinach in your teeth
    75. When you get a million catalogues in the mail, it's a good thing
    76. Sometimes, chocolate truly can solve all your problems
    77. If you're under 6', you don't have to lie about it
    78. You have never had a goatee
    79. Gay waiters don't make you uncomfortable
    80. You'll never regret piercing your ears
    81. You can fully assess someone just by looking at their shoes
    82. You'll never discover you've been fooled by a Wonderbra
    83. When you wear sweatpants, it isn't obscene
    84. You know better than to ever use Grecian Formula
    85. It doesn't take you an hour to go to the bathroom
    86. You don't have hair on your back
    87. Your GP never has to put on a rubber glove
    88. When you get dumped, you can admit you're depressed
    89. If anything on your body isn't as big as it should be,
    you can get implants
    90. You can tell which glass was yours by the lipstick mark
    91. If you have big ears, no one has to know
    92. If someone takes your seat in a bar, you don't have to hit them
    93. It's okay if you can't drive stick
    94. Ally McBeal
    95. When you fall in love, you don't need a
    "Jerry McGuire Moment" to help you realize it
    96. You get to hate Kathie Lee in the way only another woman truly can
    97. You can borrow your spouse's clothes and it doesn't
    mean you belong on Springer
    98. You've known the joy of making a collage for your BFF
    99. You can be attracted to someone just because they're really funny
    100. You bond easily
    101. When you become President, you'll be the first woman ever
  2. aaaaand bump this one cause i love you GC girlies (most of you anyways, ahahahahahahahahaha) <3333333
  3. waitttt what.

    SJ is a girl?
  4. naw (i dont think so anyways), he posted a guy one and a girl one, i bumped both.
  5. \
    oh haha i was gonna be like:eek:
    but now im like :smoking:

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