Is my boyfriend cheating on me?

My boyfriend recently dumped me. I'm a writer for a living, and it bothered him too much that I would write about our relationship (his friends would read it), and also, it bothered him that I would tell him about when guys hit on me.

I emailed him yesterday -- three days after our breakup -- because my emotions about the situation had finally surfaced, and I wanted to try and win him over. I asked him for another chance and promised to never write about our relationship again, and that I wouldn't write about my personal life so publicly anymore, and would instead focus on publishing my book. I also told him that I didn't consider his feelings when I talked about other guys hitting on me, and I would never do that to hurt him.

We ended up talking on the phone for an hour, and today, he texted me to ask me how I was feeling, and to tell me he missed me. Then he invited me to come Christmas shopping with him at the mall for presents to give to his family. He said we could walk and talk together. Our relationship is pretty new, so I've never done anything like this with him before. I'm really excited. Especially because we had such a good talk, and everything seems like it's going to be okay?

But then today, someone sent me an anonymous comment saying, "Lol, [your boyfriend] is involved with a a certain brunette with pretty eyes." And it seriously freaked me out. I know that a few of his friends read my writing online, so I'm worried that maybe one of them sent it? But at the same time, a lot of anonymous readers read my stuff all the time and send in rude comments on a regular basis.

The point is, I'm scared and I don't want to accuse him of being involved with someone else. How should I handle this? I meet him at the mall later today in around 4 hours or so -- I held back the urge to text him right now because I didn't think it would be healthy to confront him like that. I figure I should do it in person and ask while we're one-on-one?

What should I do?
Has he been involved with someone else?
Why do people try to ruin happiness like this?

I'm scared. Please help. I really care for him, but now I don't know what to think.

Edited by Pinkchu, 21 December 2011 - 10:20 PM.

Where did you hear this comment? If it was on a public site then I wouldn't care much of it. I'm sure if your (ex)boyfriend invited you to go Christmas shopping and talk it over then he isn't going to cheat on you. It shows he at least cares and wants the relationship to work.
Don't get worked up over an anonymous comment.

ask him?

Because I dont think GC will know the answer better than he would.

good luck.

Perhaps the reportee didn't know about the break-up period?

You could bring it up to him, in a non-aggressive manner.

I heard it on one of the sites I blog from and answer reader questions on. I'm able to help loads of people there, but I guess I'm just in this really vulnerable state right now and need some advice for myself.

you guys broke up it's not cheating lol

Perhaps the reportee didn't know about the break-up period?

You could bring it up to him, in a non-aggressive manner.

Oh, the person knows. I was very open about my break-up. That's impossible. :/ I keep thinking the person is doing it just to try and make me miserable because he/she knows how much I care about my ex.

If you guys arent together, he cant be cheating on you..... just food for thought...

Just go talk it out with your ex at the mall like you plan on doing. Don't make conclusions until you actually talk to him because other wise you're going to be freaking out over something that is most likely untrue.

Just go talk it out with your ex at the mall like you plan on doing. Don't make conclusions until you actually talk to him because other wise you're going to be freaking out over something that is most likely untrue.

Yeah, you're right ... And I know it's not technically cheating if we've been broken up, but it's only been for four days. He's done something like this in the past with one of his ex-girlfriends. I hope he doesn't do it to me.

Honestly I wouldn't worry about it. It's most likely someone just trying to be a dick and break you guys up, probably one of his friends. I don't think he would try to get back with you after becoming involved with someone else.

Maybe in the short time you guys were apart he got with some other chick real quick? That's a possibility but you shouldn't hold it against him bc you guys were technically not with each other when it happened.

What I would do is jokingly refer to it later when you guys hang out, like "wow look what some asshole wrote about you" with a smile on your face. Just from his reaction you should be able to tell a lot.

One thing I can tell you though is if you find out he is cheating on you while you guys are together, leave that dude. I have a one strike rule when it comes to that cheatin shit, and I know any girl that has a GC account deserves way better.

Honestly I wouldn't worry about it. It's most likely someone just trying to be a dick and break you guys up, probably one of his friends. I don't think he would try to get back with you after becoming involved with someone else.

Maybe in the short time you guys were apart he got with some other chick real quick? That's a possibility but you shouldn't hold it against him bc you guys were technically not with each other when it happened.

What I would do is jokingly refer to it later when you guys hang out, like "wow look what some asshole wrote about you" with a smile on your face. Just from his reaction you should be able to tell a lot.

One thing I can tell you though is if you find out he is cheating on you while you guys are together, leave that dude. I have a one strike rule when it comes to that cheatin shit, and I know any girl that has a GC account deserves way better.

Thank you. I've been screwed over by guys before. I can't help being a little scared.

Thank you. I've been screwed over by guys before. I can't help being a little scared.

Hey I've been screwed over by women too. It happens but you just gotta have the strength to leave right away and make them see it as their loss, because it is.

I wouldn't jump to conclusions though. Sounds like he really cares about you.

Who cares it's just sex. If you really love someone, then you wouldn't care who they fucked. It's just a dick in a hole people. Just a dick going into a hole.

Hey I've been screwed over by women too. It happens but you just gotta have the strength to leave right away and make them see it as their loss, because it is.

I wouldn't jump to conclusions though. Sounds like he really cares about you.

You're right ... And I know he cares about me. When he was breaking up with me, he cried so much. He said it was a hard decision for him, and blah blah blah. And when we talked last night about the breakup, he told me he felt like time has been moving in slow motion, that he can't think of being with anyone else, and that he's such a monogamous person that the thought of being with another woman disgusts him.

I believe him.
I'm learning to trust him with time.

But if I don't bring this up somehow, I'm afraid it will eat at me and I might blow up? I can't predict the future, but I would never want to hurt him and make him feel like I don't trust him. I just want this breakup to be over and I want us to be back together again, and the thought of him being with someone else scares me a little.

Thank you for talking to me. I really needed to get this off my chest.

My gf does this shit. If he loves u and wants u back he won't cheat don't ask him over some bullshit someone told u I don't got facts then don't bring it up he's faithfull u till YOU THINK OR KNOW HE'S NOT. If.he misses u he won't cheat just chill and relax if he truly love u like I do my gf he won't cheat and its someone bullshiting with you. Remeber always trust him before anything unless he lost ur trust and faith.

My gf does this shit. If he loves u and wants u back he won't cheat don't ask him over some bullshit someone told u I don't got facts then don't bring it up he's faithfull u till YOU THINK OR KNOW HE'S NOT. If.he misses u he won't cheat just chill and relax if he truly love u like I do my gf he won't cheat and its someone bullshiting with you. Remeber always trust him before anything unless he lost ur trust and faith.

You're right.
And I'm happy to hear this from the male perspective of someone who's been accused before. And I'm also sorry to hear that you've been through such a frustrating situation with your girlfriend -- she's only doing it because she cares about you so much and doesn't want to lose you. It's the way I feel about my boyfriend too.

I don't want my boyfriend to think I don't trust him. Are you saying I shouldn't bring it up at all?

"Chill and relax. Trust him before anything else."
I know. I know that's how I should be. I want him to feel safe and comfortable with me. I guess I'm just really scared. I've never thought of him being with someone else before.

Probably, monogamy goes against human nature,tough break.

It's cool I understand why she does it and I love her and always will. I'm saying if he really is cheating then cool then him be ur way better off with him, yet if he's not he's truly loves u and u just need to relax either way tommorrow the sun will still rise u know? Gotta stay looking up.. no don't bring it up if u have hard facts enough to leave him then do so if not just gotta trust him or let him go. Unless u like fighting which I can't stand lol
You will be fine tho u seem chilled and a great person, he's stupid if he is cheating on u and losing great person.... Everyone is scared of getting hurt its life its how u deal with it and understand how to control what u can is important.

Didnt read yet but if you want to make him mad send me naked pics!