i think of it this way.. since i started smoking, i've learned a lot about myself, and it has given me that better ability to take a step back and look at me for who i am. and not just me, but the entire world, other people, family n friends.. it gives a whole other perspective. a broader one.
On this note I can say that salvia more so than any other drug has opened me up to a complete and utter mental shift. I have a fairly extensive history with various psychedelics, but none have changed me in such a profound way. If it's something you're truly interested in feel to send me a PM, always willing to open people up to what knowledge I have.
this is such a good read, thank you. But I have some questions I didn't fully understand: 1) How does one "watch" himself? 2) If I'm striving to disappear the ego from validation of others, what's the point in even talking to people or socializing? How can I exist without the motivation to talk to friends?
By "watching" oneself, what I believe he is getting at is just being more introspective, think about WHY you are thinking what you are thinking, where these thoughts are coming from, what they're making you feel. The idea is to be more aware of your thoughts and consciousness so you can analyze them and separate the good from the bad. The way weed helps is it kind of puts you in a higher state of mind, separate from the sober plane of reality, and so you can get a different "birds eye" perspective on your life and analyze it to a much larger extent, since you get the whole picture. It is easier to see the problem when you are looking at it from the top rather than in 3D. The idea is to not NEED your ego to exist, and to realize it is what is causing all your miseries, so that you strive to find a different state of mind to live in. This does not mean, however, that it doesn't have its plus points. Even most of the gurus live through their egos daily, it's just that when it's causing problems they can see right through it. It is an essential part of living with other people in harmony, and so the goal is not to be a hermit living alone all the time saying "I don't need people." The goal is to be out there living among people kicking ass as an enlightened member of society while remaining unaffected by their day-to-day worries that arise out of the ego
really?? i did salvia once and i tripped hard, thought i was sitting on top of a skyscraper sitting on the edge of my friends bed... looked like there was a street running into his bathroom that went inbetween my friends.. i had a good trip, but didnt change me the way weed has.. but it may just be since ive been smokin pot long term and only did salvia once. i do have to admit, though, salvia did open my mind up a little bit.. it showed me what my mind is truly capable of, and it's scary/amazing... no way to show anyone unless they try it themselves.. its something else.. something i dont plan on returning to any time soon.. as thrilling as it was, i dont like being that far out of control of my body. it was an experience to say the least.
You speak with such eloquence. Also thanks for the great links! My way to answer the OP Q: 1) How does one "watch" himself? " Would be to try to realise or percieve the ego from outside it i.e when someone says something that makes u "feel small" normally we react and in your case (and in all of our conditioned minds mind you) we react passively in the mind saying "WTF why did he say that, does he think that this that about me?" If u come to realise the ego is an illusion then for me the reaction is to laugh because i realise that i almost let this reflection, this false sense of self take over. A side note I'd like to add, which might seem negative. It could be a possibility that your paranoia increases while high, this used to happen to me when i just started smoking, I'd be paranoid that everyone would finish my weed and i would be protective of how much was used (others rolled since i can't roll, pipe smoker here) and i would be so fixated on that thought, so that the high wasn't great. Since now i don't regard it as "my" weed or that i have some exclusive claim over ( i.e my perspectives have somewhat changed) It has led to rather blissful, i don't care highs Hope i wasn't too confusing.
You guys are awesome. Thank you so much. I feel...free. | I had a good day today using the techniques I learned in this thread, especially those great articles. I practiced thinking why I get so upset over such little thinks like traffic. For example: I had a bad case of road rage whenever I was late to something. I would release my anger on the people in front of me, unjustifiably. I then said to myself..."Why am I pissed at these people? My lateness is NOT their problem, it is my own. I must face this problem because I created. I didn't leave early enough and I'm rushing to work expecting traffic to move flawlessly. This is not their problem, they do not deserve this judgment on my behalf." And that's when it really hit me. I started to see all my problems and people's problems as their own. Took me an hour to get home today, and not a single fuck was given. It was very relaxing. Thank you TwztedElegance, I think you've saved my soul.
Question for you guys on something I thought about today at work while reflecting sober. Could it be my Ego is panicking from losing control over me while I'm high due to the clarity of self-realization? Could my paranoia really just be my Ego trying to convince ME that everyone is out to get me, or is the paranoia a whole different subject? Because thinking back on that night, it really felt as if there was a inner conflict within myself to decide which mentality to "believe" and follow through with. And after reading that article on "MJ stopping time", could it be that I was struggling to fight my ego due to the fact that while stoned, I had more time to analyze myself instead of "reacting" in accordance to my Ego's programming? Yea...try to make sense of that. Just spilling my brain here. I love this thread.
Of course! The ego and the judgements that it tries to make you believe are under question when you're high, and so your ego feels threatened and fills you with anxiety and paranoia-inducing ideas. That is why it is "all in the mind", and the trick is realizing that you can change these conditions your mind exists in, to include a sort of area of consciousness much larger than what only the ego occupies. This is what psychedelics do, they expand your mind and consciousness, and it is only when you are OUTSIDE the little safe haven called ego created by society, exploring the forests of your mind, that you can truly look at it from an outside and unbiased perspective and see it for what it truly is. I believe this is one of the main reasons psychedelics are still illegal today. The government recognized very early that it changes people, and it changes them in a very specific way; it makes them not care for the worries of society anymore, run by the agendas of politicians and the wheels of capitalism. And of course they cannot have that, and so they promote alcohol and tobacco and caffeine, because these drugs make you conform to society. A simple example which most people can relate to is the guilt many people feel while blazing because "they are using drugs" and society says drugs is a no-no. That's a direct consequence of your ego feeling threatened and trying to throw out the oppressor (in our case, the suppressor) by making you believe it is something harmful, when the fact is that a rational mind when presented with the bare facts should easily realize marijuana is much less harmful than any other common drugs out there. Most people, when asked about weed, will just go "OH NO! It's a drug. Drugs are bad!!!111". This is so fundamentally silly and irrational, because when you dig deeper and ask them what is the actual problem, they have no idea what it actually does. Their mind just goes one way: this is a drug ---> drugs are bad. full stop. They refuse to believe anything else, because then their ego feels threatened and shattered, and these people know nothing other than their ego.
That's incredible man. Is there anything you can recommend besides the already posted articles that will help me even more? On a side note, those articles had me thinking...How can I live peacefully and free in a capitalistic society while having a relationship with Marijuana? I mean, of course I have to work for a living but what career field can I pursue that doesn't involve the inflation of the ego? The article seemed to discuss the choosing of a side...either Suppress or be Oppressed...Is there a middle ground where I can live in peace? (without the extremes like devoting oneself to being a monk) And is my relationship doomed if my partner (5 year gf) doesn't choose to live like me, the suppressed mentality? She would fall into the category of the child who is always told she is good/pretty/intelligent etc...feeding value from others.
Listen to Terence Mckenna on YouTube, his lectures have been fascinating me for the past few months. The only thing to do really is to always look inward and try and understand and get to know your mind as much as possible, because if you know it it can't hurt ya The key is to find for yourself the optimum amount of time you can live your life giving in to your ego, without having your soul eaten away. Most days you will spend pretty much all day giving in to your ego, because most days it will make the right choices just coz most of your life is going to be lived in society. But when it starts troubling you, that is when you should have enough understanding to know it is tricking you, so that you can see past it. You should know... it is not the only way. Most people hear their ego telling them something and never question it again, getting miserable over silly things just because they believe there is nothing else to do. The picture you want to paint is not of a monk living isolated far away, but of an individual well-integrated into society, being able to live a good life inside society because he can see "outside" society, and so be unaffected by people trying to get him to conform by buying a pill for this and a counsellor for that, working a 9-5 for the rest of his life, and from a higher dimension it is easy to see how everything works in our simple lower dimensional reality of life and how the game is to be played. That is what I call like to call life sometimes, the most realistic game you will ever play. One of the key ideas I have about people is that they are run by incentives. Each and every action has an incentive behind it, so if you can figure out the incentives, you can figure out what people are doing and what they will do next, and most importantly, WHY. And if you offer the right incentive, you can get people to do anything. To put it simply, "Everybody has a price." [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5e-79-Z5Kg0&feature=related]YouTube - Terence McKenna ~ Inspiration Through Cannabis[/ame] These questions can only be answered by you. Can you tolerate her being less "understanding", or will it frustrate you? Only time will tell
True that ^^. From a personal experience, the herb has made me "not care about certain things" when I am on it... this could be bad in some cases, but I used to always care what people thought of me. I had a hard time being myself. Marijuana brought a lot of self-realization to my life... and I'm talking from personal experience, no bullshit or Bob Marley.
I think you answered it in the fact that we must find a balance between oppression and suppression to the point that it doesn't affect us negatively. She could/can not agree with my life style choices but in the end, my favorite new phrase, "that's her problem". Im happy with her and realized (thanks to you) to NOT carry any negative reflection she has on me because it is "not my problem". I like her just how she is. Twzted, you've helped free, enlighten, and form a new stronger man. I'm happy you came into my life. I really am. Thank you.
Glad to help.. making sense of it and putting it into words helps me try to make sense of it as well Exactly. In most relationships people go around trying to change their partner to match what they want, but I think this is immature and pointless, as if your partner doesn't balance you, you have no right to try and change her to match what you want because she wasn't put on Earth to satisfy you. If it doesn't work out, simply accept that you are two different people and move on rather than bickering and trying to change each other there are 6 billion+ other people around, someone will come along if things don't work out eh
Twisted, i've got some questions. And a little back story...I did exactly what the article (false ego) said not to do...I talked about the ego...tried to help others...when it was not my place...my ego came back, sneaky little fuck. -When catching the ego...how do you set apart the self from the ego? Am I supposed to GO with the good ego? For example if i see a pretty girl, i think "damn, i want to hit that"...Is that the EGO or the self? and how do you satisfy that self? Do you do it by seducing her or just being plain upfront and saying what you think (if it doesnt cause misery)? Is this where being a functional member of society comes in and learning about what works and what doesn't with women? -what about stealing? If i see something I want that will make me happy, but I cant afford it...what do you do? The misery is that you can't afford it due to lack of money, but money is a creation of the OTHER (society) which is false...? Why be miserable making the money to get something you want, or is the misery of working for the money the price to pay for happiness? Hope you understand where im coming from. I don't know if my "good" ego even exists or who the self truly is when watching the ego.