I just got this in an email, it's great stuff! Enjoy! Seven Steps for Overcoming Ego Seven Steps for Overcoming Ego’s Hold on You A message from Wayne W. Dyer Here are seven suggestions to help you transcend ingrained ideas of self-importance. All of these are designed to help prevent you from falsely identifying with the self-important ego. 1. Stop being offended  The behavior of others isn’t a reason to be immobilized. That which offends you only weakens you. If you’re looking for occasions to be offended, you’ll find them at every turn. This is your ego at work convincing you that the world shouldn't be the way it is. But you can become an appreciator of life and match up with the universal Spirit of Creation. You can’t reach the power of intention by being offended. By all means, act to eradicate the horrors of the world, which emanate from massive ego identification, but stay in peace. As A Course in Miracles reminds us: Peace is of God, you who are part of God are not at home except in his peace. Being is of God, you who are part of God are not at home except in his peace. Being offended creates the same destructive energy that offended you in the first place and leads to attack, counterattack, and war. 2. Let go of your need to win  Ego loves to divide us up into winners and losers. The pursuit of winning is a surefire means to avoid conscious contact with intention. Why? Because ultimately, winning is impossible all of the time. Someone out there will be faster, luckier, younger, stronger, and smarter-and back you’ll go to feeling worthless and insignificant. You’re not your winnings or your victories. You may enjoy competing, and have fun in a world where winning is everything, but you don’t have to be there in your thoughts. There are no losers in a world where we all share the same energy source. All you can say on a given day is that you performed at a certain level in comparison to the levels of others on that day. But today is another day, with other competitors and new circumstances to consider. You’re still the infinite presence in a body that’s another day (or decade) older. Let go of needing to win by not agreeing that the opposite of winning is losing. That’s ego’s fear. If your body isn’t performing in a winning fashion on this day, it simply doesn’t matter when you aren’t identifying exclusively with your ego. Be the observer, noticing and enjoying it all without needing to win a trophy. Be at peace, and match up with the energy of intention. And ironically, although you’ll hardly notice it, more of those victories will show up in your life as you pursue them less. 3. Let go of your need to be right  Ego is the source of a lot of conflict and dissension because it pushes you in the direction of making other people wrong. When you’re hostile, you’ve disconnected from the power of intention. The creative Spirit is kind, loving, and receptive; and free of anger, resentment, or bitterness. Letting go of your need to be right in your discussions and relationships is like saying to ego, I’m not a slave to you. I want to embrace kindness, and I reject your need to be right. In fact, I’m going to offer this person a chance to feel better by saying that she’s right, and thank her for pointing me in the direction of truth. When you let go of the need to be right, you’re able to strengthen your connection to the power of intention. But keep in mind that ego is a determined combatant. I’ve seen people end otherwise beautiful relationships by sticking to their need to be right. I urge you to let go of this ego-driven need to be right by stopping yourself in the middle of an argument and asking yourself, Do I want to be right or be happy? When you choose the happy, loving, spiritual mood, your connection to intention is strengthened. These moments ultimately expand your new connection to the power of intention. The universal Source will begin to collaborate with you in creating the life you were intended to live. 4. Let go of your need to be superior  True nobility isn’t about being better than someone else. It’s about being better than you used to be. Stay focused on your growth, with a constant awareness that no one on this planet is any better than anyone else. We all emanate from the same creative life force. We all have a mission to realize our intended essence; all that we need to fulfill our destiny is available to us. None of this is possible when you see yourself as superior to others. It’s an old saw, but nonetheless true: we are all equal in the eyes of God. Let go of your need to feel superior by seeing the unfolding of God in everyone. Don’t assess others on the basis of their appearance, achievements, possessions, and other indices of ego. When you project feelings of superiority that’s what you get back, leading to resentments and ultimately hostile feelings. These feelings become the vehicle that takes you farther away from intention. A Course in Miracles addresses this need to be special and superior: Special ness always makes comparisons. It is established by a lack seen in another, and maintained by searching for, and keeping clear in sight, all lacks it can perceive. 5. Let go of your need to have more The mantra of ego is more. It’s never satisfied. No matter how much you achieve or acquire, your ego will insist that it isn’t enough. You’ll find yourself in a perpetual state of striving, and eliminate the possibility of ever arriving. Yet in reality you’ve already arrived, and how you choose to use this present moment of your life is your choice. Ironically, when you stop needing more, more of what you desire seems to arrive in your life. Since you’re detached from the need for it, you find it easier to pass it along to others, because you realize how little you need in order to be satisfied and at peace. The universal Source is content with itself, constantly expanding and creating new life, never trying to hold on to its creations for its own selfish means. It creates and lets go. As you let go of ego’s need to have more, you unify with that Source. You create, attract to yourself, and let it go, never demanding that more come your way. As an appreciator of all that shows up, you learn the powerful lesson St. Francis of Assisi taught:”…it is in giving that we receive.” By allowing abundance to flow to and through you, you match up with your Source and guarantee that this energy will continue to flow. 6. Let go of identifying yourself on the basis of your achievements  This may be a difficult concept if you think you are your achievements. God writes all the music, God sings all the songs, God builds all the buildings, God is the source of all your achievements. I can hear your ego loudly protesting. Nevertheless, stay tuned to this idea. All emanates from Source! You and that Source are one! You’re not this body and its accomplishments. You are the observer. Notice it all; and be grateful for the abilities you’ve accumulated. But give all the credit to the power of intention, which brought you into existence and which you’re a materialized part of. The less you need to take credit for your achievements and the more connected you stay to the seven faces of intention, the more you’re free to achieve, and the more will show up for you. It’s when you attach yourself to those achievements and believe that you alone are doing all of those things that you leave the peace and the gratitude of your Source. 7. Let go of your reputation  Your reputation is not located in you. It resides in the minds of others. Therefore, you have no control over it at all. If you speak to 30 people, you will have 30 reputations. Connecting to intention means listening to your heart and conducting yourself based on what your inner voice tells you is your purpose here. If you’re overly concerned with how you’re going to be perceived by everyone, then you’ve disconnected yourself from intention and allowed the opinions of others to guide you. This is your ego at work. It’s an illusion that stands between you and the power of intention. There’s nothing you can’t do, unless you disconnect from the power source and become convinced that your purpose is to prove to others how masterful and superior you are and spend your energy attempting to win a giant reputation among other egos. Do what you do because your inner voice always connected to and grateful to your Source-so directs you. Stay on purpose, detach from outcome, and take responsibility for what does reside in you: your character. Leave your reputation for others to debate; it has nothing to do with you. Or as a book title says: What You Think of Me Is None of My - peace, joy, love, and light
Sorry I posted this in the wrong section. Can a mod please move this to the spirituality and philosophy section? That would be so great. - peace, joy, love, and light
I agree. You can't get rid of it, the best you can do is balance and not let it control you. Sorry I worded it wrong. - peace, joy, love, and light
From what I read I can conclude that I already dissolved my ego without knowing it, but now I know it and don't like that i did it. How do I balance myself?
Seems like I lost my ego a long time ago. Or at least it doesn't affect me at all in comparison to the Mr. Machismos everywhere.
This makes for very interesting reading OP. Societal burdens produce so much baggage in our lives it's crazy. I went to Jamaica to volunteer building toilets for poor people in the South of the country and I was lucky enough to meet and interact with and observe them. And there was such a tranquility within their environment, it was incredible. They had nothin but a small shack to live in and their food to keep them alive, and with that you could see love was perpetuated in everything and their ego was so small. It was like, say you have a rich man, he lives in suburbia, he has a typically well-furnished and itemised suburban home. And he reads spiritual books and he does yoga and he prays to a God whose existence he is unsure of, and he searches for truth and meaning in everything he does. And yet he finds nothing. And I realised when I was in Southern Jamaica, or I felt like I did anyway, that the people there didn't need to search for their meaning, they didn't search for approval amongst others, because everyone was devoid of expectation. You couldn't be too strange or too jaded or too simple. You simply were. Everything was an existence, and everything other than that was non-existent, a facade, a smokescreen that blocks out the simplicity of life, alone, without any societal expectations. I just think we have so much in our rich countries and in our suburban or inner-city neighbourhoods and towns that distracts us from a truly conscious existence, and makes us search for something besides it, all the while robbing us of moments of our life. Anyway, sorry for the long post, this thread made a lot of thoughts arise within me. Peace.
Thanks brother, that was an awesome post! I totally agree. The ego feeds on arguements and negativity. A lot of arguments and negativity arise from interactions with material items, social problems, and the pressure of society. That's why people like you discribed are in less of the ego's grip. They have less negativity in their lives and that means the ego had less food. They don't have to worry about what people think of them, they don't want to be the best looking, they don't want to have the nicest, biggest house in the neighborhood. They just live and love. Like the great Bob Marley said, "no worries". Just be happy and live your life the way you please...don't dwell on what society wants. - peace, joy, love, and light
dude that was an excellent read . thank u so much for it . i copied it down to wordpad and saved it for future reference.
your ego just came out, you not only compared yourself and categorized someone but you also insulted that group of people.
Some ego is good. It's good (to me) to be able to stereotype because it lets you know people without meeting them. I know it's bad and you shouldn't do that but let's be honest, most people are uninteresting and extremely egotistical. Hate to be 'that guy' but being cynical has its ups...
Thanks for postin this buddy! Always refreshing to see a new perspective on how to lead a peaceful life; that last point really spoke to me
Everyone here has an ego, it reside in us. Therefore u cAnt simply dissolve it or get rid of it. But u CAN stop from Identifying with it