Me and my pal were smoking some gdp one time, Friend: "ffffuuuccckkkkk" Me: "what man?" Friend: "youuuuuuuuuu" I cracked up for hours.
My brother was high af recently, an he wanted me to play a video game with him. He was like "Come on duddeee!! pleaaaseee! I never ask you for anytthingg!!! cept when I ask you to make me food an like, get me stuff!!!" I was like..did you even just hear wtf you said?? Lol it was pretty fudgin funny the way he said it to. blehh, my bros a doofnugget
First post : ) still baked from last night after smoking 4 grams with some friends one of them started saying "dude i cant think" and i said of what and he said "of anything!" And he screamed it. I couldn't stop laughing lol
Me: dude, on a scale from one to invade Russia, how bad is your plan? Friend: *chuckles* maaaaaaan North Korea can suck my ballsack. Me: Fuuuuuuuuuu you're right.
It's so crazy getting the notification that someone liked this post.. Then seeing it and realizing that katie died 5 days later. Happier times, for sure. Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
there was this little guy we called monkey. he was a little dude but always dressed as a punk rocker. he also had a smiley face burned into his cheek. he told people it was because he did some dirt for some people or something like that. the truth though.... he was smoking a bowl with 3 or 4 people and one of them is this chick i know. it was her last nugg and monkey gets the first hit because the pipe is his. he takes a small hit, chokes and blows the bud out of the bowl and into the wind. gone, gone, gone... this chick gets fucking pissed and while monkey is still choking and everyone else was moaning in disappointment, she takes the lighter she was playing with a burned a fucking happy face in his cheek for doing it. it sizzled. it might even have smoked a little. monkey was such a fucking pussy that he cried and ran home. it was pretty fucking funny. guess you had to be there. another time that same retard monkey was out drinking with us. he was pretty hammered and was talking shit. you know how guys will go on about how big their dicks are and stuff like that right? well when it came time for monkey to jump in the conversation he bent over and said "i got john holmes in my ass bro!". we were like da fuck? it was really funny and he never got to live that down. you know, i just realized that none of this shit is nearly as funny as when it happened. even as fucked up as i am
I was hanging out with some friends blazed outta my mind, all laughing and talking and having a good time, when my friend tells us to quiet down because his mom might be listening, and in my mind i thought "the walls have ears" which i thought would be a clevver way of saying someones eavesdropping, but instead i said the "ears have walls" with such confidence that it couldve been true.
just had one all by myself, i was playing silent hill 2 on hard action level and extra level on riddle level, the hardest difficulties the game has, and i beat it. I just said "who's the baddest motherfucker in the valley..."
My buddy walked up to a girl with a sad ,dead serious look on his face. Without cracking a smile. And said. My dick died.......................... Think i could burry it in your arse? Lmao.
i have this friend who is extremely creative. He, me and another friend smoked up. sudden in complete silence he just uttered out "what if there is a priest, who is addicted to marijuana" then he went on to describe the trailer montage we laught for the longest time while tryin to recall what he said
Smoked with my friend for his first time and his exact quote was "I'm so high, I feel like a cinnabun before you put it in the oven"
One winter it was snowing and my friend goes "it's like God is jizzing on my face". Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
"Put my toaster back." 'What toaster, I did'nt make any toast.' "Put my toaster back, motherfucker." 'I DON'T MPHH KNOW WHAH URH TAGHING ABOUT I DN MEK NE TOSHT' "PUT MY FUCKING TOASTER BACK GODDAMNIT!"
Well, its not really funny and kinda sad but the second time i got super high we went and sat down on a green bench. I was just laying n the bench just drifting in thought. Next thing you heard"It's fucking Stephen Hawking" And i swear the m eyes were like Niagara falls it was absolutely hilarious!
My friend knew this guy who would supply weed for random things like giving him a ride to the liquor store. This guy was a gay hippy and my friend lied to him by saying I was gay. Well one time this guy felt me up and so the next time we visited him my friend got his pants wet. My friend talked about how his pants were wet and I replied "that's not the first time your butts been wet". The thing was that we were not alone as our dealers older gay "friend" was there along with other "friends". My friend said he felt like they were eye-raping him after that. He was mad but hey karmas a bitch ha know. Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
On Sunday after me and my girl got high, her mom comes running into the room crying. We were high as fuck so we're laughing our asses but we're still like wtf. We say what's wrong??? She goes "E.T. Just wanted to get home ðŸ˜" as tears are rolling down her face. WTF LMAO Ass fat, yea I know.