Rap battle anyone?

Test me, one at a time please.

you want to battle on here Tokingtoker?

You first... haha

Back from the dead, haha, more like smacked in the head
I'm a pyscho crazy nut, I'll slice your stomach and spill your guts
Pop three rounds while you screaming on the ground
You can't talk no more when you dead
You cant walk no more when you dead
This is the shit, this is melee, this is new jersey, go back to LA
Mic is smoking, better spit it before you choking.

Oh no tokingtoker thinks he can rap
but It took him half n hour to write 7 lines of crap!
you get stoned alone alot, and this I'm sure
My hooks are a lure, my rap is more mature
and your
messing with the wrong rapper
I'll smack ya faster than you can smack me, your rap is tacky
people read that shit and can only say exactly!
I'm not here looking for your appeal,
this is just to see if these potheads can see the real.

dog, you don't want beef it's bad for your cholesterol
Your a bitch like a christmas tree, I come up and hang my balls.
Now bitch, your watching me stomp you, look what 5 bucks at the dollar tree got you
I don't smoke alone, But I talk to your mom at night over the phone.
Your raps mature, bitch don't make me roll on floor
Potheads see all the real, cause I'm coming for the steal
My fists will swarm, you'll think its a fucking thunderstorm
n!ga in the hype
todays the first day of the rest of your life as a regular joe, with a regular flow
So I'll take a big mac no pickles
and a regular coke.

Shit you think you the big deal?
I will eat you up like a fucking meal!
Take your ass down
and make you look like a clown.
And once you see, just who I be,
Shit will stick to your head
and torment you till you dead.
so show me your best
cuz you wont pass this test.

Oh no, look
Get this kid a fucking happy meal
So i can get back to robbing his stereo
Take your test, shit man you already know I'm the best
Talkin to a straight up pyscho
I'll blow your brains out and eat them like its stew
But you wouldn't know since your lyrics make you sound like your two
So eat that happy meal and come back when you for real.

TokingToker has potential
but its filler,
Bullshit, acting like killer, like you pull quick
its just foolish spit, your shit
Right now- your probably falling down a ladder
don't waste your lungs when theres no rungs its just splatter!
glad this isn't live
you spit so much bullshit
when you pass it back I gotta wipe off the mic cap
And I don't like that
cocky rappers get it the worst
and I'll be leaning over you asking if it hurts
when it happens
your not rapping, its more like slacking
its got me laughing
talking about new jersey and LA
what you trying say?
I'm from Canada, eh!

This kid has game, but not enough, I'll put him to shame
I'm a serial killer master material thriller
If you say I'm fake you... must be baked!
Your head is wack, oh gee... you smoking that crack?
He's from canada, saying hes a rapper
But they still call the toilet a crapper.
I asked for a big mac and a coke
You ain't even get it, your a fucking joke
I bet he's tired from working at mcdonalds
And wonders why he still lives with his mama
With all those clothes on I bet this motherfucker looks like osama.
You know I'm street
I pack heat longer than shaqs feet
You already know you got your ass beat
So why dont you take a seat?

Well Im impressed with what you had just written
My interview at Mcds is tomorrow but I'm already sitting
And all the clothes I'm wearing , I wear cuz I got no heat
Its pretty shitty in my city now who's the one thats street
Oh and I live at my pops, but hes never hear,
plus he lets me grow my crops! and we both brew beer
I have nothing to fear
Most poeple don't shit about my country
come here to fight me and you'd freeze solid before you punched me
dress you like a girl do your hair with scrunhy
Call me a the Crazy Canadian Pot Junky
I spit no Bullshit, my methods remain funky
Your lucky,
that you haven't mad me mad
I get glad
by making others sad -
See that shovel in my trunk?
No its not for snow, its for stupid rapping punks!

Your smoking weed when you ain't got heat
No wonder your ass is street
Living in your home must be beat
This guy takes rhymes from commercials
No wonder why hes a fucking emo, all anti social
We got a white boy trying to rap
But he fucks his sister, this motherfuckers wack
Crazy lunatic trying to rap better than me
He does heroin with a spoon and bic
Your probably as skinny as a stick
I won't need to punch you when I hit you with a brick.

Did I make you upset?
Your lack of self respect is a direct
indication that your hatin
on me cuz I write intelligent rap, what the fucks up with that?
And what commercials, I don't watch TV
I don't have cable so wheres your ryhmes from... G?
listen to me, your making idle threats
You got terrats? Yeah
I'm skinny, and I guess you got breasts?
tell me again, who is the best?
How'd you know I'm white?
check my profile cuz you ran out of stuff to write?
All the while super sucking on your pipe
Nervous you will loss this battle, hands shaking while you type
I got you right?
Your just like that -
you can't dis on matt
You say what you say and then I say fuck that!
Top it, but don't go off topic
Your gonna choke soon and theres no way to stop it.

Why wouldnt I hate
When it takes you 20 minutes to think and write
Do you really think I'd know if you were white
Of course! Cause you cant even fucking rap straight
Your rhymes are cheesy, your flow is easy
So why dont you take a step back and please exscuse me
Hell yeah I got breast, I'm touching your womans chest
I can smoke on my pipe, cause I can make my money
I'll pay your girl to lick it, I'll be like, go ahead honey!
You see this between my index and ring?
It's my bird, thats what I think about all your words
You couldnt crush me, you cant even touch me
You just love me.

I see why you think I rap simple
I'm to advanced,
and you can't read!

But I don't need
to justify
why
You suck
So I separate my ryhmes
so your little mind
won't get stuck
Besides I'm not saying I'm the best
but you are, blind just like the rest
lets go get a second opinion
cuz we've been rapping and shit but we both think we are winning
I think its clear who has more good stuff
even a retard could rap like hes all tough
your a big bluff
I'm guessing your under twenty
Cuz your not just saying stupid shit, your giving us plenty
Do remember in my first
verse?
about how long it took you to write back
Don't give me no crap
about 20 minutes
fucking forget it
if this is all I was doing tonight that would be pathetic
What you up too?

Shit I think you just have no idea.
Hell is the place i'll cya.
After I take you out 1, 2 shots no doubt
cuz my hands be to quick for ya
And deep down you know you don't have it in ya
to really see what's in my head,
and with that being said,
I will leave this thread,
cuz really I think it's for special ed.

Ayo alice, please go back to wonderland
i dont really mean to diss you and i hope that you will understand
but cat your wack rap is givin me a heart attack
you can't rip on the mic without the skills you lack
and whenever i smoke blunts, im always the one that rolls
i like cash in my pocket but i keep it out my bowls
i dont want to have to stomp you pussy ass weasles
cause me and my dude picked up an 8th of diesel
and shit is lemon fresh its got me stoned off my ass
but still fresh enough to kick a freestyle and relax...

if you wanna battle
ill make yo head rattle
and leave you without a paddle
while im learnin how to saddle
your mom.
Pt 2.-
if you think that your the best
then you should retake the test
cause i got A's in the mail
and all you did was fail
so imma have to pay your bail
since youll be in jail
and yo mommas broke
and your friends still choke
when they smoke the green
yadadamean?
3-
your still a rookie
think its cool to play hookie
just go become a bookie
and ill be bringin in some nookie
grow upchuck
and i dont mean vommit
gimme a target and imma bomb it


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you need some more cocoa butter
to wipe on your head
i dont know what goes on in there
you might awready be dead!
cuz you donno how to grow
and you roll reallllly slow
hah tryin to dis your only bro
for dolla yo ass will blow!
like the big bad wolf
tryin to get some sausage.
are you even black
cause you dont got a 6pack
mabey of some smirnoff
bitch you got better grammer than webbster
you shoot a free throw like shaq
your getto game is whack
and hey fool i am a cloud
and you are not at my level
my truck is gettin loud
your still dancin with tha devil
your only check is wellfare and child support
while i cash my paycheck and light up a newport
jk ciggs are bad and so is the pope
down with dope, N up with hope
SIKE

im white to the bone
got a bad bitch on tha phone
your momas on the other line screamin come home!
im uncomfortable sittin on this throne
jus blew 2 bleezies to the dome
and hey ya guess what
its exactly what you got
you might of forgot
that you dont smoke pot
and i hold a lot
make your brain rot
my rhymes are sooper dooper
you carry a pooper scooper
cause your rhymes are shit
leave a taste in ma moth make me wanna spit
like your girl and yo momma
im osama and imma bomma
when you feel like hustlin
gimme a call
cause i run track
and can find the 8ball
i got a motor
yo ass got a bike
my ass needs a mic.
your girl is a dike?
keep watchin "like mike"
i hate when you say mac
cause i never know if its the one with n'cheese on the pack
or the big one that comes with fries and a drink
you need a bowflex
lookin like a burnt up trex
without the teeth and claws
your just to damn soft
went on a diet but i see your off
your moms callin bye "cough cough"

get some new rhymes
cause youve commited some crimes.
you said the same shit in our battle
your like a baby with a rattle.
i hope you realize
that your rhymes are real lies.
you need to recognize that i got you beat
deja vu? exactly, this shit is a repeat
so go ahead and plead defeat
get on your knees, off of your feet.
and do what you do best
you failed your first test
cause you got caught for piracy
a battle between you and me?
we know what the outcome will be.
im gonna put it plain and simple
your set is fake
you might be baked
go ask god to forsake
because imma earthquake
your just a mistake
im munchin on some pancakes
while your writing down my lines
i know your fate
i finish my plate
and wipe my face
your a disgrace
please stop rappin
cause im tired of trappin
you in your lies
tummy full of pies
and a heart full of tries
you need a better disguise
if you dont wanna get caught
for stealin my plot
your rhymes will rot

charles stop stealing my words
yuor being a pretender
get real
be you

it took you an hour to reply
now im gonna make you cry
lay in some grease your bout to fry
your frontin like your hard
but you still got your v-card
and your rhymes are from a retard
gonna call me queer
you take it in the rears
after a couble beers
from one of your peers
somethins in your eye, i think its a tear
you need to realize im your biggest fear
sorry but your still not real
cause your still tryin to steal
first you need to learn how to deal.
cause nickle and dimes is chump change
your house is a dump make it go bang bang.
hah you about to fall
to your knees
cause i am a wall
pay your fees
dont try to ball
pretty please
ill leave tracks on your face
cause im running you over
im winning the race
you need a 4 leaf clover
i set the pace
you follow like rover
just like a dog
you still lost in that fog?
cause your not catchin up
im ready to dine
your like a little pup
and i am a k9
i leave you behind
eating my dust
blame it on rust
im a vetren dont try to bust
bye bye
dont try and fly
cause noone will sigh
your goin to jail
cause you committed suicide
and you owe me for the ride
leave with some pride
im not on your side
atleast you tried?

dog, you don't want beef it's bad for your cholesterol
Your a bitch like a christmas tree, I come up and hang my balls.
Now bitch, your watching me stomp you, look what 5 bucks at the dollar tree got you
I don't smoke alone, But I talk to your mom at night over the phone.
Your raps mature, bitch don't make me roll on floor
Potheads see all the real, cause I'm coming for the steal
My fists will swarm, you'll think its a fucking thunderstorm
n!ga in the hype
todays the first day of the rest of your life as a regular joe, with a regular flow
So I'll take a big mac no pickles
and a regular coke.

+ rep.

Yo Ruse don't read shit that
bitch MCs spit, you might as well quit
if you ain't legit
rep GC with the shirt on my back
don't fuck with yay and I don't smoke no crack
but as a matter of fact
I'm an addict
used to have 14 Neville's growin' in the attic
my blazing, dude it's anything but sporatic
I got drug tests, I make sure I get my practice
back on topic, what was it?
I don't know, I forgot it
well fuck it, let the rhymes pile up
like tears in a bucket
if it was a crime to rhyme I'd be doin made time
because I learned from Sage, Immortal, and Sublime
if it wasn't legit to spit you'd get community service
I got rhymes so pricey I buy rap insurance
what time is it?
can't tell
I've been rappin' a spell
ain't got no records to sell
and I'm tired as hell
bitch you take the mic
and let me hit this L

Some of you guys are pretty good, dead, ruse, clipse

As for the battle with me and back, idk who wins so like he said someone else should pick.

Anyone else want to pull me out, give me your beat.

Alice..

Look at this guy making 3 stories of crap
somebody give this guy a hard wakeup slap
oh no wait! somebody take that back!
Chop his fucking head off put it in your house
for a memory of a fucking retard
this guy makes 50 cent look like a hero
ill put a whole entire bet of zero
On this white rapping robert de niro.


PS everyone knows a rap battle is a minute
So what were you thinking with those extra 40 minutes