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Question on fake bladders for randoms

Discussion in 'Marijuana Consumption Q&A' started by casualblazer25, Feb 18, 2015.

  1. #1 casualblazer25, Feb 18, 2015
    Hi Everyone. I'm sort of new to this website have read a few forums. I haven't smoked in a while (like over a year) due to now having a job that does random testing (although I've been working almost a year and it hasn't yet and people tell me it doesn't happen that often) but to be on the safe side I have abstained. I was never a stoner just used to smoke every now and again for a different kind of night.
     
    Lately now I have been wanting to smoke again, not just for recreation but also medical reasons, but don't want to risk losing my job if I have a random test the day after I smoke. So after doing research through forums for a couple weeks, I wondered if anyone had any insight as to whether the following situation would be plausible? I was thinking about purchasing one of those fake bladder synthetic urine belt things and just wearing it to work everyday just in case of a test. Has anyone done this or something similar? I have read about keeping something like a small cooler or lunchbox with your bottle of synthetic preheated and ready to go, but I'm not to certain I would be able to stall for time to run to my lunchbox and remove the synthetic urine check the temp, etc. It seems that most doable scenario would be my belt idea (I don't know how comfortable it would be to wear or move around with). Then to make sure every morning before I go to work that I preheat my solution, strap on the belt under my pants and shirt and go to work. My job isn't too physically demanding. I'm on my feet all day and only have to bend down to get stuff every now and again. Thoughts?
     
    I also am uncertain how viable synthetic urine will be after heating it up every day, 5 times per week and maintaining it at that temperature for 8 or more hours a day. Any insight on this? Will it be good lets say after 3-6 months and then require a change of batch? I have purchased specimen validity test strips for this purpose and plan to test my batch every 2-3 weeks.
     
    My other thought process was to keep a dilution bottle in my car each day with the following(sports drink mix and b2 complex in it) 500ml and rollaids and maybe an aspirin or 2, and take that incase I need to dilute too. I already take b12 every day and drink 3000-3500ml water every day as is and take creatine when I work out. Thoughts?
     
    Sorry for the long thread but would like insight.

     
  2. #2 PatrickXy6dC, Feb 18, 2015
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2015
    Mate, you're getting really complicated.  Wearing a fake urine bladder or keeping diluted urine handy is going to be tough.  Is your job one where if you have an accident they test you?  There's no easy answer, either smoke and take the hit if tested, keep smoking to a bare minimum, or stop smoking while you have this job.  It's a tough break I know.  I would count on not being tested.  Good luck, keep us posted on how you handle the situation.
     
    For myself, I have a high BMI (fat, plus low metabolism) and am still dirty after 45 days even when I just smoked once.  I am sure this is only because I'm fat.
     
    Oh, sorry, I just read your second post.  Have fun getting blasted that last time (for a time anyway).  Good, intelligent choice.  A good job is a good thing you don't want to mess up.
     
  3. #3 VivaLaWeed, Feb 18, 2015
    how badass would it be if this was a reality show concept:
     
    Nervous employee shows up to work too early and sweating. "Today might be the day!" he thinks to himself. "Good thing I have this piss taped to my leg."
     
    dramatic music, stealth scenes, suspicious boss, that one co-worker hes not sure if he can trust, un-supportive home life.
     
    I would watch.
     
  4. #4 OldDesertDog, Feb 18, 2015
     
    Awesome idea. There could be a whole series. "Piss Test Dodgers". Oh, the drama!
     
  5. #5 weedislife, Feb 18, 2015
    That is intense man, wow. I smoke everyday for years and love it very much but wouldn't go through anything near that just to smoke.

    If you're that worried about it, you definitely shouldn't smoke at all. Or smoke and risk it, but fake bladder, synthetic piss, and constantly keeping it warm? Really overboard. I can't even believe you're serious.

    Really it would probably just be easier to find another job. And that's not a joke.


    Sent from this guy
     
  6. #6 GentlemanJosh, Feb 18, 2015
    Fake bladders have never really worked for me. I have had to test for a few jobs and I always just abstained for a few days and drank plenty of cranberry juice. The juice will clean out your system as best it can. Your metabolism also plays a factor.
    Back to the fakie bladder. Its just too cumbersome in my opinion. I liken it to those boda bags you strap to your legs filled with booze to try and sneek into a concert.
     

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