To my spiritual and non-spiritual folks, how is it that you decide what you need? Need is loosely used, so perhaps want to do. How do you decide what you want to do in the next moment? Next day? Year or two? For instance, I had a free day Saturday. Nothing planned, too cold to snowboard so I slept in, lounged around, got high..made up an excuse not to see my friend who I haven't seen in a while after saying I would. Nothing got done, I felt like ass doing so but was left with almost nothing in the think tank. Who else has struggled like this? so many options, laziness trickles in. What do you guys do?
So many options? Sleep or visit your friend? I can empathize though, so many people thrive on keeping busy and occupying their minds, whereas i am usually content to be by myself and think/learn, listen to music or do something creative etc. I have few friends but their quality always makes them even more enjoyable than my solitude, usually.
Very relatable. I don't know whether it is something 'wrong' you fall into doing, or it's just a phase until your mind shifts into the right vantage point to encourage something more.
Op. I'm feeling like I'm at a pretty low point atm. Not doing anything productive with my life right now. Don't know what to say other than that. I know there are things I could be doing, but there's like a mental fog or something and a whole lot of laziness.
I think a lot of it is also related to whether you are "ok" with who you are. Not to tout the ole, often mindlessly uttered "You gotta love yourself!!" line, but I think in this case it holds value. What I mean is, if you are someone who is generally >truly< happy about where they are in life, then you might be more ok with just letting a day slide without doing anything special. On the flip side, if you are generally unhappy, or even just not very content with where you are, then wasting a whole day might feel like a contribution to the unhappy/unsatisfying position you're in. Just for example, if you hate your job, and you spend a whole day just lounging and not doing anything, then in the back of your head a part of you might be saying "this is a day I could have used to find another job, but I didn't, therefore I will continue to be stuck in the job I'm in and hate". Meanwhile, someone who loves their career and has put in a satisfying week @ work prior to that might have no problem letting a day slide to laziness because it did not contribute to unhappiness since they are returning to a job they like.
I think there's a problem with opening up. There's so many artificial boundaries within our own self that limit us. I think it's trepidation. I think it's when we have to face things in our selves be we simply cannot because we need more time, or we just haven't reached the point where you can face them. Laziness is the greatest disease in our world right now, I think. The dullness that we allow to come to the forefront and diverts our attention from the important things.
It's funny because when you have things to do and you're busy and caught up in the machine you want nothing else but to be free from those obligations. Once you're free of them you want something to do again. I've been going to school and working two jobs and all I can do is wish I was finished with it all and just have one job and my time back to myself. Then I realized a few days ago what I would honestly be doing with my time. Playing games, listening to music, watching movies, being with friends. All things I have roughly the next 70-80 years of my life to do. That doesn't make me want to be free any less... but it's something to think about lol.
I find that any lack of motivation on my part is largely due to the stifling climate in America. So many bullshit laws, regulations, permits, fines etc, I feel the hurdles to success are nearly insurmountable unless you are born into money. Instead of following some interest or passion, ive decided my goal is to help defeat the stranglehold of the leviathan in D.C. and every far reaching tentacle. It enrages me that I can but dream of the things i want to do, but for the sake of my fellow and future human beings, i will fight for them.
Shooting guns, spending more money then I should tricking out my 370z, driving through the desert at insane speeds, killing bad guys on Xbox, and playing some MMOs is about all I need..oh and having a job to facilitate my lifestyle doing this.
Its really just about finding something you enjoy passing your time doing. Because in the end that's all you have. Time.
I'm sort of in the same boat on this one. Mountain biking in the woods (ton of trails where I live), gaming, working out, and a random chick here or there keep me fairly entertained. It's very important to not overdo any of those though or slumps can arise. As much as I love each of those activities, sticking to just one of them for an extended period of time can become quite boring. That would be another big part of "knowing what you need" - diversity. Not sticking to one activity.
Haha. The next day on the Sunday I had an idea of what I wanted to do/get done. So I made out a little plan in my head, always allowing for things to change. Anyway, I thought to myself about the day before and out of the myriad of possibilities I could have posed my attitude on it, I decided... eh, you need a day like that, be glad it came and went, carry on and do not delve into it. What I find most interesting, is there are times where it seems like the ONE thing to do (in a physical sense) is so obvious, ever gracefully flowing into the next...to stop and think about what/how it is hinders future moments. Then, times IIke that Saturday, I could not decide for the life of me what it was that I wanted to do. What also helps is having different things to do, a wide range. Sports, books, socializing, sex, being a do it yourselfer, learning a language, meditation, yoga, helping someone/ good deeds. All of this is dandy, just how do you know what it is almost instinctively without creating excuses to be lazy. At times I can't even think of 2 things I actually wanna do. I feel it's in part being almost...too in tune with yourself and not having enough of the letting go factor, feelings of guilt (for some reason I feel I need to deal with this) or whatever the case.
It's because the distractions don't feel right. Feels like the activities we do aren't the ones we should be doing.
Boredom, tiredness, hunger, and loneliness is the enemy. So I spend my time battling those with internet, sleep, food, and companionship. Depending on how I feel will determine what takes top priority. Kind of primal but it keeps me honest.
I think it's very important to be honest with oneself and not succumb to fillers. All of us have needs, something that fulfills us and gives us purpose. A cruel trick of nature is that illusions can be created by filling one's life with replacement activities. The most famous one is eating. People get depressed, so they eat chocolate and sugar because of the dopamine/serotonin discharge they create. People also eat out of sheer boredom. It is also important, albeit quite difficult, to realize when an activity we love has become a filler for other life essentials. For example, I love gaming, but if I'm gaming 18 hours a day, there might be a problem. The personal life of a biological being might just be like a vitamin intake chart. Vitamins are good, but you don't need ONE vitamin. You need several. Therefore, it is important to get a diversity of vitamins, rather than overdoing one to compensate for not getting enough of another. As much as I love gaming, sitting in the house all day and staring at a screen WILL lead to depression unless I get out there and do something else. Exercise is a major one and I thank my lucky stars I actually like to exercise and stay in shape otherwise I'd be a couch potato (aside from work) myself.
Value, productivity, worth..... sounds like an overseer of some business or product line where dollars and cents are being calculated. Why the harsh self criticism and for whom are you reporting this worth/value to? Some fictitious character or idea? Your not a slave, you are not being traded as a currency, and you are not some product being evaluated in the way in which your portraying yourself. You were born and now you are here... you owe nobody nothing, regardless of what your mind/ego is telling you. Don't be so hard on yourself, your here to exist, explore, learn, and find truth if you so choose. Everyone is alive for the very first time and nobody knows what they're actually doing...even though it sometimes seems like people 'think' they know. There is no blueprint for life, there never was!! There is no finish line after you accomplish what you 'believe' you need to accomplish at the end of your life (and the end can occur at any moment). No one's going to high five you on your death bed. What happens when your brain dies? All your beliefs of how your life is supposed to be, all of your accomplishments in your mind, and all of your desires die along with it and exists no more....then who did all that actually matter to?