I dont know what to do

Discussion in 'Real Life Stories' started by Bztorres, Nov 23, 2014.

  1. I know this has nothing to do with any of you guys as this is my problem and not yours, but I truly am in need of some guidance. I don't have anyone to talk to. I'm in one of the lowest of the lowest situations I've been in my life.

    I'm an 18 year old senior. I've always been a motivated individual, inspired by the opportunities success allows. Because of this I made a big change In my life during April 2014. The way I ate. I began a strict diet plan and went to the gym 6 days a week. I had everything in sequence. Everyday after school I would wash the dishes and clean the kitchen before my mom got home, I would even prepare and cook my own food to take to school, I'd read, and go to the gym. I had A's in school. All the while I was smoking every day. I always waited to smoke until I had completed my tasks, it felt great being high and not having to worry about doing anything other than just enjoying the high. It was truly a prime time in my life. Everything was so perfect.

    After months of doing this and smoking under the radar. One afternoon on a weekend day in September 2014 my mom had left to the store to get groceries. Minutes after saying bye I went to the back to smoke. She happened to forget something and came back to the house and caught me. She took my pipe, computer, phone, everything from me for a week. I wanted to explain and try and talk to my mom but I just couldn't, she just wouldn't understand and comprehend it. She is close minded and is 200% against marijuana, she takes everything about it to the extreme.

    I got depressed. I stopped cleaning the dishes, cooking my own food, stopped reading. She blamed all this on weed. Time passed, I got everything back. Except one thing, my mom was on top of every single damn thing I was doing, which eventually led to me getting caught about 5 more times during a time period of about 2 months.

    Because of how my mom is and crazy she gets about weed. I lied every single time. I always told her that it was my last time in hopes of being more strategic on not getting caught and never having to lie again. Basically I lied to not have to lie again, but clearly, I got caught several more times.

    All the while every time I got caught, the even more depressed I got and started doing less and less tasks. I always stuck to the gym, never let go of that one.

    Because of this about 10 days ago I decided to take a tolerance break and let things smooth out and get on track with my diet, cleaning the kitchen and having things like how they uste to be.

    Everything went as planned, I got my mom to trust me again with my own money that she's been holding on to. I found a strategic time to smoke last night, and in the midst of all things my mom caught me. She canceled my phone, and took everything, except my tablet which is what I'm using right now.

    Everything is like a repeating cycle except now me going off to university is likely to happen now( I was accepted to an out of state university).

    She thinks if I go off to college by myself I would get lost into the world of drugs but ITS THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE.

    What I'm feeling right now is unexplainable. I'm even getting even more depressed on remembering everything that's happened to write it down. It's so ironic how this has to happen to me. My mom doesn't understand that she's not helping me at all by what she's doing, she's just helping me in bringing me down. I just want things to be the way they were. It makes me so sad.

    There was much more that I had to say but I can't take the pain any longer. Thank you so much if you had read this far.

    Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
    . .




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  2. Grow up, don't rely on weed. Fix your priorities, it seems you only care about the weed and the fact you got caught 5 times in a 2month period just goes to show that you shouldn't smoke till you have your own place or you're off on your own.
     
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  3. ^^^ exactly.

    Why don't you respect your mother?
     
  4. I don't think he needs to fix his priorities. He's obviously very independent and helps around the house and only smokes once he's gotten everything done. Sounds like he's got it all figured out to me.
     
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  5. Show her what you just wrote.

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    • Like Like x 6
  6. Lol your post ends with "sent from my iphone"
     
    • Like Like x 2
  7. Listen, I'm going to give you real genuine advice. Reading this hit home. I've been in this position before and I know how much it sucks. Really does feel like your life is just this never ending cycle of being content and then getting caught and starting from square one. And the only issue? PEOPLE WHO ARE CLOSED MINDED ! It blows. So here's what you do. If you seriously want to make a change then you can, it won't be easy and your going to have to work your ass off for it. Everyone else on here may say respect your mother and blah ze blah but honestly I 100% disagree. She's not respecting you at all. All that shit that u did for her and how well you were doing all while smoking and she can't even use that as a reason to listen to one damn thing you have to say? Your 18 years old. Finish out this school year, you can do it it's not much. Smoke when u aren't home find ways around getting out even if it's just for 10 minutes. Get a job if u don't already have one and SAVE THE FUCK UP. Save change, save most of your paychecks. Save everything. Once you graduate. Move the fuck out and be the successful human being that you are capable of being. Once your a bit older your mom will listen to you. Educate her. She needs it


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    • Like Like x 3
  8. for real though
     
  9. Do what the first comment said. And second comment. You sound like you really have it all figured out. The universe test you again and again until you learn your lesson. You obviously have not learned your lesson and when it comes to parenting your mother is doing the right thing to take the luxuries away and let you marinate in your thoughts. Maybe she needs to come up with another scheme to get you to break this pattern because your not only hurting yourself but your hurting your mother too. You are breaking the trust barrier that you gain and continue to break it by your actions.
     
  10. I hope your playing around because you cannot apply your experience to a stranger who is going through serious issues with his parent. This isn't a joke and as the majority of the comments agree, respecting your parents goes a long way.
     
  11. Stop smoking. Your mom is scared for you. Of course she wont listen and you aren't making it any eadier by betraying her trust and keep smoking the very thing she thinks is going to kill you.

    Stop smoking weed while you live at that house. Keep your contacts up to date but quit for now.

    At least stop smoking at home or hell make brownies ir cookies at a friend's place and store them in your room.
     
  12. Hey man, you gotta look at it from my perspective. My mom passed away on March 28th, 2000, when I was 6. So I wish my mom could flip shit on me, and yell at me and whatnot.

    You should probably just stop smoking for a long ass time, or until you leave for college. At least that's what I would do.

    Good luck with everything, man.
    God bless.


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  13. You need to stop smoking in your mom's house. Regardless of how closed minded and ridiculous her beliefs are to you, you have to respect that she is the one who owns the place, and just because you are legally an adult does not mean her house rules don't apply. You wouldn't smoke in a friends house if they told you they weren't cool with it, so why do it to your mom? I really do hope you feel better, but come on man, you're obviously smart, use your brain,


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  14. because who gives a fuck about their parents opinion if it's stunting their own chances of success?

    I said screw my parents opinion in highschool, and turned into the wealthiest and probably most happy student I knew. I Planned everything MY way accompanied by 4 hour ocd rituals a day, and got my life perfect... or at least
    my definition of perfect.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  15. I'm not saying he should disrespect her, by all means don't smoke in her house. But if he doesn't want to deal with her and the so called "cycle" anymore then yeah he does have to save up and move the fuck out that's the only clear option for himself and how is this at all not serious advice


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  16. "Hi, thanks for raising, feeding, taking care of me for 18 years... But if you don't let me do illegal drugs under your roof, well, forget all that shit, fuck you."

    Op is not trying to be responsible, he was, but then got all bummed out and lame because mommy wouldn't let him smoke pot.

    Once op moves out he can smoke all the pot he wants.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  17. #17 Joyetech, Nov 25, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 25, 2014
    yeah I was quite drunk writing that haha must've sounded snobby asf, I viewed that in a personal sense, because as an adolescent, I can guarantee that my life was 1000X twisted, screwed, and belittled, in comparison to your average "little Johnny from across the street" so I took matters into my own hands, and got everything on track taking nobody else's word for anything... I dunno, maybe people with severe mental disorders have a completely different way of thinking :shrug:
     

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