this was the type of post i was looking for. i wasn't looking to be criticized. just empathized with. people seem to lack a sense of empathy. and they comment about my mental state haha. some people are so..not sure what the word is. i'm glad someone can relate. it hasn't been easy. and yes, writing it out for the world to see.. helps me a bunch. not really asking anyone to read it. i just wanted to put it out there so i can move on.
read the posts better. it's just certain people that don't get it. others know what i'm trying to do. what do you think i'm doing...by posting this? you're telling me to look for creative outlets, when i'm doing just that. what do you think this is? i was just trying my hand at "emotive writing". sorry you didn't get it. it's fine.
How old are you OP? Sounds like me when I was 21-22.. You're holding her in waay to high regard, probably because she doesn't want you back. It's natural to want something you can't have. Get off facebook, stop talking to her, work on yourself and go get yourself a fine new lady..or don't. Just stop with this pathetic whining. Everyone goes through this shit, suck it up and be a man. You're probably thinking 'damn I'll never get a girl as fine as this one was.' Keep thinking that way and you'll turn yourself into the pathetic loser you think you are. This is coming from someone who turned themself into a pathetic loser over a girl for far too long. It's not worth it, you're losing the most precious resource ever..TIME! Get your mojo back and go http://youtu.be/oEOFffIizdw
i don't want to do this. i still want to be her friend. i mean..just because i couldn't commit the rest of my life to just her...it doesn't mean i don't like her! it's not black and white like that. she's an awesome person and i'm happy she allows me to be a part of her life. i just need to deal with not being her man. yes, of course i get jealous. who wouldn't? but, i mean, i just need to remember the bigger picture. because obviously those feelings are still there. just need to learn how to be a good friend, and not let those feelings surface, especially just because she's really pretty. she was left for a reason. her attractiveness shouldn't sway me. even though it does lol
op i feel what you are saying im in the same position just not physco status like you i cant seem to get far enough away from my ex the memorys fallow me trapped in my own mind kind of like my own prison but one day you will realize that you havent thought of her in the longest of time and then you will be able too let go with that realization.
Not possible. You've got big ol doey eyes. You must get her out of your life or you will waste years on her.
yeah, it's nice to know that it's not just me who goes through this. that it's a part of being human. it's nice to know i'm not alone. it's not nice to know that people think i'm crazy because of this. at least i'm not shooting people up. i wouldn't do that. sucks that you went to jail because of it. at least i didn't do anything but create "weird" threads online...just venting about it. even though the criticism is harsh and made it harder to deal with. this isn't the first thread about this. this one actually went pretty well. i've seen them go way worse. it's been a process...but i'm past the lowest point. i'm rebounding from her. it feels good. i know some people don't really get that other people..are really..sensitive when it comes to relationships. some people can get in and out of relationships in no time flat. not me. i've had three exs in my life. each one of those times it took me 6-8 months just to feel better about everything. some people...put a lot of themselves in a relationship and when it doesn't pan out it really does hurt. i'm getting over it. at least i can talk about it now. and not just curl up in a fetal position and sleep 12-14 hours a day, like i have been. it's looking up.
i'm a couple years older than 22. maybe i am being pathetic, but i don't think i'm a loser. plenty of women are always trying to get me to talk to them..hang out with them. even today...i woke up to a girl that texted me...assuring me it was ok that i kinda blew her off yesterday..when we were going to meet. i was busy talking to said girl via fb when that happened. so yeah..pathetic seems apt. umm. i can't bring myself to cut her out of my life completely. but i have reduced the relationship to just via fb. deleted her #. don't ever see her. no texts. i think i might delete my fb for a while. i think i'm doing fine though. but maybe you'll be right in the end and i'll need to cut her out completely. i should have enough control of my feelings to not let her be a factor anymore. i should be able to control my feelings enough to still be her friend and still give other girls a fair chance. i'm thinking that day is coming, and one day soon. it's not the first time. but hopefully this is the last. i don't ever want another ex.
I don't know what gave you the impression I'm 22? Or that I'm "newly" married? Perhaps I should re-phrase what I said, I assume your a guy so I was using masculine tense. If you were a woman, I'd tell you to act like a woman and strap up. I'll use a general non-gender based term - - grow up. If I'm hurt or upset, I don't go posting up things like "OH I miss him so much I wish I could just lock him away in a dungeon forever" That sounds crazy. When girls say that kinda shit, they're crazy. Just because your a man, it doesn't make you less crazy. Listen, when your posting things that sound crazy, you gotta expect a response. I don't know if you think its a romantic idea to be jealous enough to want to lock someone away so no one can look at them but you, the idea of someone looking at her picture makes you angry, these are things that send up warning signs, especially to females. Words have a lot of power, whether you understand that or not, you might laugh it off and say "OH I was drunk when I wrote those things" or "Oh I didn't mean it THAT way..." But you didn't say it that way, and I don't care that you were drunk, being drunk doesn't mean the words coming out of your mouth have no connection to what you are really thinking/feeling. So you can be offended if you want to that I think you sounded crazy, but you did. Maybe don't post things like that up for the world to see if you don't like what people think of them.
woah woah woah woah I didn't go to jail because of her... I just so happen to be with her in a volatile relationship when I went to jail. She proceeded to dump me because I was then in jail and not free.
The problem is you're not looking for love, you're possessive, and you value looks above all. With this attitude, you deserve to be alone. You'll move on, at least I hope so, because you seem like a stalker IMO.
I too have been going through something similar the last three months. It's just life man, everyone's been where you've been or will be at some point in their lives, the important thing to understand is that you have to move on, otherwise you'll be stuck like this forever, and I'd hope you wouldn't want for that to be the case. I did much of what's being advised you do; delete the girl off Facebook, start thinking about yourself and ways to better yourself instead of the whole "woe is me" act, people get tired of hearing about it pretty quick - you'll realize that.
Can we finally remove this troll from GC? He's been doing nothing but making pointless points for weeks, this sites really become useless lol Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum mobile app
I mean, it wasn't anything bad. We were just different people. She was a bit wild, I'm a bit more reserved. She experimented loads, I'm a bit more cautious. Also, I had to move away because of work stuff whereas she needed to stay in school. Plus, she had had what I thought was a lot of sexual partners, and I didn't like that, but I'm over that now. Also, I realized I want my wife to be able to speak Swahili because it is important to me to pass on that culture to my kids. And, she didn't know if she wanted any kids and I know I want like 5 or 6. A part of me wants to retire back in Africa, but with her that wouldn't really be an option. Beyond that...not much else. And I'm still not sure if those are good enough reasons to have moved on. Because I really did like her as a person. Still do. Maybe I expect too much from one person? It was just different values. Even though she had a lot of what I was looking for as well. Very kind. Very brave.Very much herself. Always willing to hear me and my problems out. She would call me out for bullshit. We had a lot of the same attitudes about the world. We even shared lots of similar issues lol. She was also biracial. And also half american, half not american. She had an international type perspective that Western women don't typically have, she wasn't the typical American girl at all...always in their own cultural bubble. She had perspective, valued the different, was always so kind to everyone...even those that people shunned. She would try to make everyone feel better as a rule. She was never about herself. She also kept current with international issues. She knew French. She was street smart. But I owe it to her to not settle for her. She should be everything I ever wanted. Back then, she wasn't...idk. I didn't want to be the guy that settled for a girl. And I liked her so much to not do that to her...to be someone I settled for. She should find a guy that can't believe he's with her. Even though now I'm like...I can't believe I was with that girl... I mean, she's fixing to become a model! Wtf? Whoever marries that girl is one lucky sob