I've been in college just for a month now and I've been meeting all these new people. I've been meeting a lot of hot girls but I noticed one likes me. I asked her out for some drinks and to go see some live music. We had a great time, ending our night with a few drinks and oysters we decided to go back to her room to watch some Dexter. We snuggled up in her bed and made out for a bit and went to sleep. The next night a similar thing happened just more passionate making out and some feeling around. We are also getting a hotel and going to a rave a few hours away this weekend and will be dipping into some of that "culture" if you know what I'm sayin We have the same group of friends that all know what's going on but nothing is official. I know that I probably should have made a more advanced move but I actually care about this girl and want a relationship with her. She just got out of a breakup with an asshole boyfriend from home a couple of weeks ago, I understand if she just wants to chill for a bit. So basically I just need to open our line of communication about our relationship and I need to figure out what she wants so I can act accordingly. How can I do that? Could it be as simple as bringing it up in conversation? As much as I want a relationship, I'd still be down just to hookup because this girl is so fucking beautiful. I'm still shocked that she into me at all, I can be sort of a geek sometimes Is there a way that I could mention that I'm still down to hookup but remain sincere in proposing a romantic relationship with this girl? TL;DR Been spooning and making out with a girl for the past few nights, wanting to take it slow. Need advice advancing the relationship in some fashion. Thanks! BuddhistBrian ~
I'd hit it before you bring up a relationship might rock the whole boat away from your favor to be honest. If she just got to college and out of a relationship she might just be lookin for a good time and if you propose a relationship it could deter her from a hookup cause she knows you gonna catch feelings. But she could also want a relationship. So I'd hit it once atleast then bring it up.
This. Females want the DickSauce™ first, followed by Love®. Its not the 90's anymore where they want Love® first, then the DickSauce™. Im like you man, i like to take it slow, but we need to get with the times, were getting left behind, feel me Sent from my XT1080 using Grasscity Forum mobile app
You are actually thinking in the manly direction imo. I am a 22 female college student and there is nothing wrong with taking things slow. Especially if the girl just broke up with someone. Anyway, you can't really expect so much from her with the fact that she just broke up with someone. Honestly, hopefully she is actually over this guy (depending on her situation and how long they were together). If so, ask her what she wants from you. Something serious or a fling kind of thing? Be direct with her and make her be direct with you. Simple as that. Having sex fast does not guarantee anything solid and if she isn't really that into you like that (making you a sideline) then you would be the one that gets hurt in the long run. The question is you can't have it both ways. Hook up and at the same time propose a relationship. That's pretty deceptive because if you do hook up and she doesn't want you, then what? That's why sex should not be a priority so soon, it just complicates shit. Trust me.
Keep it real Brain she don't wanna just hookup she likes you and cares for you from what I read take it slow she wants more than a booty call why wouldnt she do that preps or frat boys cause she knows your different than most. Stay different and use your heart as your guide not your cock heart and cock gotta be inline you as a Buddhist should know this. Take it slow my best advice she sees your different and that's good! Peace bro Sent from my house.
I appreciate all of your comments, more feedback is encouraged! By the way, thoughts on writing her a poem to illustrate my feelings? (I'm a damn good poet)
Personally, I would think that a poem would be extremely sweet and would be +++ brownie points in my book. But the cautious side of me wouldn't do that until you knew where things were headed. You don't want to write her a poem if she's just looking for a hook up. She could run for the hills. Maybe save the poem for a more special time.
man people have some terrible advice... you just need to play it by ear dude. I think a 3rd date is a little soon to be talking about a long term relationship. just go with the flow and make sure she understands you want it to go that direction but don't smother her with it. like if I dated some chick and just told her right away like have my children and live with me forever she would freak the fuck out.
Currently this seems to be going good for me, so i second this advice. Go with the flow and take it slow, but make it known that you are up for a relationship down the road. I say dont try to hit it now, that will come in time if you guys stay on the path that your currently on. Maybe say something like "Im currently looking for a girl friend, but im willing to take it slow and dont want to rush things, so lets continue to be friends and see what happens." then if she says that she isnt looking for a relationship (which is quite likely), you just keeping doing what your doing and the idea will always be in her head. Seeing as she does like you, id say if the friendship goes well she will catch feelings soon enough.
Just bang if you have the chance. You can date later. Don't make that mistake. I did once, fuck that. Girl was mad as hell at me.
Thanks everybody for the replies I realized that this girl just isn't for me, she hooked up with a random dude at a bar with me and my friend tonight. She was pretty drunk and she still asked me to dance with her. Tomorrow I'm just gonna sit her down and lay it all out. I appreciate the support in general y'all. I'll let everyone know how this all goes.
Man, I hate that. Had a similar experience, realized that a lot of girls just don't know what's good for them.
Man the last chick I was with I waited a year before we had sex she was a 20 virgin and the night we did it was on our wedding night 16 years ago last week. Now the girls before her were all hit it and quit it type shit. Good luck. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
She picked a dude to fuck in your presence? Grow a sack. Its the nicest thing I can say to you at the moment.
I feel like such a pussy for saying this but I just can't get it out. I can't tell her how I feel about her for some reason and it's frustrating me. Everytime we hang out I end up getting so baked and forgetting about it. I keep dwelling on the idea of how our relationship will completely change after I say that set of words, it's really detrimental. Any wise words of advice y'all?