Apprentice Tokers Guide To Smoking At Home Not Getting Caught

For fellow blades out there who live at home and for some reason can not get caught, this is a guide to smoking weed in you're home despite your anti-marijuana parents. Following these steps does not guarantee you don't get caught, but makes you're chances a hell of a lot better. I have been smoking since I was 13 (18 now) and have gotten caught two times, (when I was 14) and haven't had any issues since. I've broken this up into several sections for you, trying to be as brief as possible.

HIDING/STORING YOUR PARAPHERNALIA AND WEED

Finding a good spot to stash you're weed and paraphernalia is essential. Try to think of a spot unique to your room, and DO NOT use any of the following spots --- in drawers, because the smell will stay in there and eventually make that drawer reek as soon as you open it (but if you take out the bottom drawer and toss your shit underneath you should be good), under your mattress (everyone knows about this), in air vents (unless you don't use them, because if you do it will make your room reek if they turn on), and in plain sight (no shit!).

Keep your herb in a airtight glass jar preferably, you can probably find one in your kitchen, the best of them have a rubber seal and are truly airtight. Also try hobby shops or a 420 Science pop top jar (they work very well). Link here - http://www.420science.com/Medium-420-Jars

As far as paraphernalia goes, your best options are the MFLB vaporizer (http://www.vapeworld.com/magic-flight-launch-box-vaporizer?___store=default&___store=default&gclid=CJ3hh4rs7b0CFRRbfgodbqUAOw) or a small glass pipe. The MFLB is a bit expensive, but very worth it. There is only smell of burnt popcorn, which can be easily covered up in many manners, and the amount of weed you save is amazing. I'd stay away from huge bongs or blunts or joints (especially if smoking indoors), because they all have a lot more smoke (LESS SMOKE = LESS SMELL). Store your pieces in a bigger glass jar if possible, or in a plastic bag. Make sure to clean them after a couple uses to keep them from getting smelly (when I don't clean my pipe for a while you could smell it from across the room).

COVERING UP THE FACT THAT YOU'RE HIGH

Eyedrops - the best eye drops you can use are rhoto drops, but they can be a bit difficult to find and more expensive than most other brands. Some people swear by visine or clear eyes, so find the brand that works best for you. Put them in BEFORE you smoke, as it's easy to forget when you're high, and can be hard.

Air freshener - the best shit you can use is ozium. A quick two second spray in the room that smells, close the door, return in 10 minutes to a smell free room. It literally has been proven to eliminate odors, instead of just covering them up. Again, using a MFLB makes sure there is almost no smell.

Being a dumbass - don't eat everything in sight, control yourself or don't make it obvious. Don't say stupid shit, learn to act sober by being around friends and not telling them you're high. Try to talk normally, when high your pitch may change a bit.

Sploof - a sploof is your best friend when smoking. Just take an empty toilet paper tube, put three dryer sheets on the end and rubber band or tape them on. When exhaling, blow through the sploof and your smoke/vapor comes out smelling like whatever the scent of the sheets is with a hint of weed.
Good guide or making a sploof - http://forum.grasscity.com/apprentice-tokers/95042-official-step-step-how-make-awesome-sploof-pics.html

Gum - covers up the smell of weed on your breath, mint or cinnamon are best.

ROUTINES FOR SMOKING

Shower smoke - turn on your shower as hot as possible, close all the windows and turn off the fan/heater. Put a rolled up towel to cover the crack of the door. When your bathroom is very steamy, take your piece or vaporizer (DO NOT USE A JOINT OR BLUNT, THEY LET OFF EXTRA SMOKE), and begin smoking. When you're done taking your hit, cover the bowl with a quarter or your thumb to put the cherry out, ensuring no extra smoke comes out, except what you exhale. Make sure you exhale out a window or use a sploof (both is best), and turn your bathroom fan on. When you're finished, take a shower (or give the impression, some people claim it kills your high, it doesn't seem to for me), and gather all your shit up, and hide it immediately. It seems like a pain, but getting it done right away prevents any mistakes there. Spray ozium/air freshener when done if you smell anything, and leave the fan on and window open. I

Smoking in your room - should only be done if your parents are asleep/not home. Open a window, exhale out the window, MUST use a sploof. Turn on a fan if you have one, and point it towards your open windows, exhaling in the air current so it's pushed farther away. Cover the bowl when you're done taking your hit with a quarter or your thumb to make sure no extra smoke comes out, or snap the bowl every time. This is a great time to use a vaporizer, as with a sploof you could practically smoke in your room without any ventilation without a problem (my experience with the MFLB, I highly recommend it). Spray air freshener/ozium after, and leave the window cracked and the fan on.

Smoking outdoors - the best option, you may want to still use a sploof though. If you're in a public area, smoking a joint is best. In your yard, make sure your parents won't call you for anything or go where you are. If they do come, hide everything, unless there is a extremely strong smell they probably won't look anywhere. Pretending to be on the phone with someone is a good, they will probably leave you alone until your "conversation" is finished.

GENERAL TIPS

-When buying a vaporizer, getting a Pax or MFLB is your best bet.
-Never smoke joints or blunts indoors, they let off a ton of extra smoke.
-Delete your texts about weed, no matter how much your parents respect your privacy.
-If you are being drug tested, see if there is any urine in the toilet. If not, fess up, it's the better way for your parents to find out.
-Try to smoke with someone who is allowed to, and blame the smell on them.
-Don't wear a ton of weed clothes, mention 420, or talk about weed a ton.
-Know your facts - if you do get caught, have an argument ready.
-Don't smoke and drive, or in the car.
-Have a code word for weed, for example ask your friends to "chill" instead of whatever you usually say so you don't have to hide your phone calls. (Call your friend, and say "want to come over and chill?" When you want to smoke, and say "want to come over and hang?" When not intending to smoke)

That's all, comment anything I left out and if it helped you. Happy toking!

 

@[member="somepoe"], why did you think it was shitty?

 

da

Damn ok.

 

Thanks, I'll be sure to add this soon.