Im Going To Be Alone Forever

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by Yummybud20, Apr 19, 2014.

  1. sucks I can never seem to get any girls I like. I start talking to girls and they seem really cool and into me, like I met this girl that is in my law program and smokes weed and she gave me her number and told me we should blaze and she also flirts with me then I find out that she apparently has a long term boyfriend. And then I've also had other girls seem interested but then I see them hitting on other guys.
     
    I just feel like every girl I like that pays attention to me ends up having a boyfriend, and the ones that are single aren't even interested in me. it must be that i'm not good looking enough because i'm really nice and people like me, like people that know me enjoy my company because I make them laugh so it's not my personality. maybe i'm a bit short and skinny, I'm only 5'8 not super super short but i'm also not tall and i'm pretty skinny only 150 pounds, and i'm not very good looking (at least I don't think i'm that good looking lol), so I feel like i'm doomed. 
     
    anyone else feel like this? I think it must be my looks so no matter how much I try I think most girls will not be interested. 

     
  2. #2 Birdlives, Apr 19, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 19, 2014
    Yeah, as harsh as it sounds, I'd expect you to end up alone without a significant other, and you have no one to blame but yourself.
     
    I've read numerous threads you started which highlight your neurotic and self defeating patterns of behavior.
    Basically the story is the same every time.
    You are a young adult struggling to find his place as a professional in our modern world, and you desire a relationship with a female who meets your standards, but you literally put in no effort in to make yourself available or show any interest what so ever. Instead, you prefer to obsessively speculate on what the possible outcomes and thoughts of any female wo shows you the slightest bit of interest may be, instead of finding out for yourself by engaging them head on..
     
    Blades who try to help you basically give you the obvious answers which are to actually open that damn whole in your head called a mouth, and express your interests, intents, and desires to possible female suitors who have already shown some inkling of a mutual attraction in you based on that fact you aren't half as pathetic you may paint yourself out to be.
    Instead of taking our advice, you make every excuse in the book as to why you can't engage someone you are interested in which usually boil down to you being pathetic, ugly, broke, ect.
    Then the impartial and empathetic members of grasscity remind you that men with less looks, less opportunity and things going for them have found female suitors you could only dream of even holding hands with.
    Clearly the issue is your shocking lack of self confidence and concerning avoidance of situations that would require you to engage the opposite sex.
     
    So basically you know why you have a lack of romantic success, and there isn't any reason for you to be in such a rut.
    You clearly have things going for you; law school (shows you have intelligence and self discipline, at the very least AVERAGE appearance (like has been said a million occasions to you, men 10 times uglier than you have found meaningful relationships, and, oh yeah, you are a white male in a society which favors you so take advantage of that! 
     
    I don't know if you want sympathy (clearly I won't give you any knowing your history in the Sex, Love, & Relationships forum of our lovely cannabis community), but you seem to brush off any useful advice and just use Grasscity as a way to vent and have people enable your self defeatism and justify your lack of self confidence and self esteem.
     
    We want to help you, but you really need to start HELPING YOURSELF!
    There are paid professionals out there who could really benefit you as so far in your patterns of behavior and your overall well being and self identity, but it really means nothing if you refuse to take advice or help yourself at least a little bit.
     
    I think all of us want to see you find someone who will make you happy and feel good about yourself, and vice versa, but that won't happen if you never admit you have a problem with how to behave in regards to that, and continue acting the same way expecting different results (the definition of insanity according to Einstein).
     
    In closing, I implore you to stop waiting for that perfect situation to fall into your lap that won't require you stepping out of your comfort zone of exposing/having to deal with your glaring insecurities. (protip: it won't ever happen if you continue acting the way you have been for the 20+ years of your life)
    Things can and will get better if you make an effort, that is all we ask of you and for years you have refused and you are in the same place as you started, so I will repeat, you don't really have anyone to blame but yourself.
     
    TAKE INITIATIVE FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE PLEASE!
     
    • Like Like x 13
  3. I'm not trying to bitch and complain and you are right that I have low self esteem bc I don't have much experience with women i've only had one girlfriend and hooked up with 2 girls. And the girlfriend I had we only dated for like 6 months.
     
     
    also how do you even know that there are other guys that looks worse than me and have no problem getting women? not sure if you've seen a pic of me.
     
    also i'm "white" as in white skin / caucasian but my families background is persian so I don't look anglo white, people confuse me for greek , armenian, albanian,italian, jewish etc but I don't think that has anything to do with my problems. i don't have an accent or anything.
     
    and I figure self esteem can be a big factor. last night i was chatting with this really cute girl at the bar (she's a classmate), and I think she still has a boyfriend but she was getting really close to me and touching me, and telling me we should blaze. Then this little asian guy half my size with acne all over his face came and stole her away from me. he just butted in right in the middle of my conversation with her and started talking to her (he's also a law student). he also I think has or had a really hot girlfriend that is taller than him and looks like a model.
     
    for some reason I just think i'm not good enough for girls. I have female friends and they talk to me and I hear about why they reject guys and they are very judgmental. for example my female friend has rejected a guy for begin too skinny or too short or whatever, but when they see a really good looking guy they are all over them.  So i have this impression of girls just going for looks.
     
    i'm trying to improve myself. my goal for this summer is to work out at the gym to get a little bigger so i'm not as skinny. 
     
    I also look pretty young not sure if that works against me.
     
  4. God dammit yummy
    Its because youre evidently insecure!
    And you just are too "nice of a guy" to see it.

    World dont owe you pussy brother. Its just an experience that you grow with. Take these words into consideration. All your threads are about chicks and not being able to secure a home run. Focus on yourself for a bit without the sense of self that seems like it recuires an entitlement to something.

    Make a thread about yummy buds.
    Like a good tasting variety of buds you pick up. Or something bro, for once something a lil diff
     
    • Like Like x 1
  5. so were you engaging the girl? Once the gook with the acne came in you should have just verbally Hiroshima'd him, know what I'm sayin?
     
    • Like Like x 1
  6. Plus, you seem like a dungeons n dragons dude trying to pick up on bar sluts and all your chick friends are sluts themselves with unhealthy mentalities and life styles.

    Stop over analyzing, enjoy life, this experience, and then it will all come together. Dont focus on that shit my nigga
     
    • Like Like x 2
  7. yeah true I should just forget about girls for a while. I have actually tried that for a while. like when I see a chick I like i just assume she prob won't like me and I just try and be friends.
     
    there was this cute girl in my class I thought might like me and my female friend also told me she think she likes me but I don't think she did. she put her arms around me once and chatted with me at the bar but then recently I tried talking to her and she kind of blew me off then I see her chatting with another guy so I was like fuck this I won't try and show interest in her anymore.
     
    my life is in limbo right now actually. I have a year of school left and I still need to get hired at a law firm or else i'm screwed as i have to pay back my 70 grand of loans after I graduate next year.  I also have no idea where i'll end up.
     
  8. This
     
    Find a girl with common interests
     
    Don't have any interests? Well your a boring fuck. Focus on yourself and get some hobbies
     
    • Like Like x 1
  9.  
    well I was just chatting with her and I was drunk so I was less shy and she was standing close to me and I put my arms around her and was talking to her and she was like yeah we should definitely blaze next year. she told me she loves to smoke weed and she had no idea that I blaze and she was telling me about her vaporizer.
     
    from what i have heard she has a serious boyfriend in another city, but she seems interested in me and she has been flirty with me also like she made a joke about wanting to arrest me and play "naughty" policewoman with me lol. so I don't know if she is just begin friendly and likes me as a friend (if she has a boyfriend).
     
    anyways the asian guy is also in law he wasn't a random dude but he just butted in and was being all aggressive (he's not friends with her) and obviously trying to steal her away.  not like there was much I could have done lol. I just went and talked to other people.
     
  10. NO! NO! NO! Yolu don't ever just ASSUME that you go fucking find out! god damnit dude did you even read the second post in this thread!!??!? That doesnt mean every girl/. IF anything assume you could bang any girl right now, you just choose not to waste time on them. Life is short brah
     
  11. #11 Uncle_Meat420, Apr 19, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 19, 2014
     
    So what did you say to the girl? Engage her dude. Girls like it when you have original thoughts and ideas and don't just agree with all the shit they say. You should have said something when the asian guy butted in, act like he was talking to you or something, and then you just verbally castrate him. Be aggressive back. Contrary to what you might think girls want to fuck nice guys most are just retarded and don't show they are interested enough.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  12.  
     
    lol I'm not a video gamer or a nerd really. i'm pretty introverted though I don't' have many friends and don't go out much. 
     
    my hobbies are definitely not something that would help me meet girls also lol. I work on cars and rebuild engines for a hobby, play electric guitar, and I'm getting into shooting and going to get my firearms license this summer. but I pretty much like doing anything and I don't' thin i'm boring, like people that know me enjoy my company. even though I sound lame on this forum in real life I actually make people laugh. like that girl I was talking to I think seems interested in me because I make her laugh and she seems to ilke me (even if it is as friends).
     
  13.  
    like I said I heard from many people that she has a serious boyfriend so I didn't want to get too close to her and make her uncomfortable. it is possible that they broke up so I don't know. we just started chatting and she told me she prefers smoking weed over drinking and I said same and we were just chatting about weed and she said next year we should definitely blaze.  then that dude came and put his arms around her and started talking to her lol. what could I have done told him to fuck off?
     
  14.  
    how do you find out though? like the girl that I had a crush on from class I thought she might be interested in me because a few weeks back  she came up behind me at the bar and put her arms around me and seemed interested in chatting with me. but then last night she was was acting totally opposite, like I tried to start a conversation with her at the bar and she just gave me short answers like she's not interested and then I saw her chatting with some dude, so that pretty much seems pretty obvious to me that she wash' interested.
     
    what would I do keep on pursuing a girl that shows signs of not being interested until she straight up tells me in words that she isn't interested?
     
  15. #15 Uncle_Meat420, Apr 19, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 19, 2014
     
    Never ment to imply you were a "nerd". I don't see how your not getting pussy if you do all those things. Mechanics and musicians get the most pussy!
     
    I'm super introverted too man I understand how it is but the only way you will ever get a woman is by opening up and talking more
     
    I don't understand why you are obsessing over this interaction if it was so short
     
    Also who cares bang her any way not your responsibility to make her faithful to her BF
     
  16.  
    Dude these chicks are bar sluts, you need to bang them the first night they show interest or they decide you are not interested and move on
     
  17. #17 Yummybud20, Apr 19, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 19, 2014
    ^ I don't know if that girl I like is a "bar slut" she is also a law student and I've seen her flirting with guys at the bar when she comes out but I don't think she goes home with any of these guys she always leaves with her female friends or guy friends. but I could be wrong.
     
    one thing I have learned is that as soon as a girl gives me any sign that she is not interested like giving me short answers not seeming like she wants to chat I ditch her and assume she is not interested and try to talk to other girls.  
     
    Isn't this the right thing to do? I don't want to focus on a girl and keep on trying if I'm getting sings that it is not going anywhere.
     
    like with my female friends I see them literally chase a guy and do anything to get his attention when the like him, the guy barely has to do anything but just respond to her.  one of my female friends even chases this guy that is straight up rude to her and ignores her, and she wants him because "he's hot". maybe my female friends that does this is not typical though and she's just fukt lol.
     
  18. #18 Yummybud20, Apr 19, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 19, 2014
     
    well i'm not exactly a musician like i'm not in a band or anything. I just play guitar when I have free time and I have been working on cars for a long time.  I get my female friends mssging me when they have car problems asking me what's wrong with their car, doesn't get me laid lol.
     
  19. I'm pretty fucking high, and this thread made me sad :( 
     
    • Like Like x 3
  20. Stop being so insecure!! Stop calling yourself ugly, too skinny, too short. 
     
    You said it yourself, people like you, you make them laugh. If you stop being so insecure, and just put yourself out there, I imagine you would be surprised how things might turn out.
     
    Fyi, there is nothing that is sexier then confidence, seriously. Just don't ever overdo it ;p
     

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