I'm not one of those subscribers to "complete honesty." If you know something is going to hurt your partner don't tell them unless it relates to their physical well being or health. Its just too much trouble in the end, sometimes there have to be secrets if you want to protect the greater good. If you feel a need to disclose something about your past hopefully there are friends and family in your life you trust to do that with. With that said, if a guy breaks up with you for such a minimal reason he might have been thinking about doing it anyway and this was the perfect cover to do so. Its usually never one thing a person breaks it off for, often there are multiple reasons, whether he expressed them to you or not. My advice, move on to the next until you find someone that is tolerant and understanding. This is the same thing I'd tell my daughters. Don't live in the past or based on the reactions of others because if you do that you won't be able to live the kind of life you want to for yourself.
see I kept it from him because I knee he would overreact and blow it out proportion like always....he doesn't see it that way. Thank you I think you're comment actually did clarify some things. And touched on some valid points peace love and bud
LOLwat I know for a fact this is for sure not just "white people". I've actually heard the opposite wayyyy more often. OP, I personally don't think it was worth the break up. I do agree that it probably sucked to see that, and as a jealous person I'd probably flip shits over it, but in the end of it I don't think I'd just end things over that one text, particularly if you explained the situation to him afterwards. I definitely wouldn't be cool with you texting him after the ordeal and I'd probably be more paranoid about trust, but imo ending it like that was a bit on the irrational side.
Even in AA you are told not to confess to things that will cause excessive distress to the "victim" for no real reason. That said, would I be mad if I seen it? If I was in a young relationship yeah for sure. After a number of years though it seems like making assumption based on such little evidence causes more harm then good though. If I were to see it right now I probably wouldn't give it a second thought. If your spouse hasn't earned some benefit of doubt after even just a year or two, something dire is wrong
me and even several of our very close friends tried to explain to him but he is just ignoring me now... like...Im just gonna give him space for a few days and try and call him or something peace love and bud
You both fucked up, and to be honest he will probably never trust you again. He felt the need to go through your phone, which is a breach of privacy to begin with, and it shows he is jealous and insecure. The real problem though is that when he did snoop...his suspicions appeared to be warranted. Some random dude was confessing his love to you and you didn't tell him to fuck off. I would never be with a girl who had conversations like this with other dudes and didn't put a stop to it. Why should he trust you, your actions don't come off as trustworthy. This relationship seems doomed to me. Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
What I wanna know is how did you reply to that 'I love you' text, that could have a lot to do with it too.. Wraaaap the night around me, blanket of black on my back, I feel safe in the darkness...
You are beautiful and socially fine, go find a new bf who knows how to act. Also learn to be respectful of the person you are with. Dont be talking to other guys and calling them "friends". If you were friends you'd be talking like friends prior to and during the relationship; women just want the attention of an interested male. Behavior like that will rarely net you a healthy and trusting relationship, I mean if he had a girl texting him everyday you'd be wondering wtf is going on there. You're his gf why doesn't he talk to you, right?
well ya see....I gave up all my other male friends for him but all of his friends except for maybe 4 were girls.....and about 5 of the girls he was friends with were his ex's....and I never said anything....but then I have one dude that I talk to every now And then and he flips shit. peace love and bud
Yea I understand I have a gf. I have had this discussion, the only rule I layed down is when we are together(she lives IL for college and me Maryland permanent) for a week or 10 days you cannot talk to any male "friends" out of respect for me. I say it in parentheses because men have no interest in friendship, I have seen when they try to hint in texts, and read what she says back(yea I checked on my own). She is faithful and good but I still had to put some restriction on it.
put a lock on your phone? delete txt messages? learn how to cheat. Sent from my SGH-I337M using Grasscity Forum mobile app
see that's what I want. A respectful relationship and just have that understanding and boundaries...maybe luck will come my way peace love and bud
It takes time and work, communication. You cant just run off and hide, not expressing yourself properly. It is simply not a functional way to behave. Life simply cannot function that way, you'll never move forward. Explain that to him and if he doesnt get it then oh well. You'll be fine you will find someone who understands how a functional relationship works, if he cannot.
thanks ill see how this week goes and if it don't work then I will have to accept it peace love and bud
Yeah..this is one of those things, that if you have to say it, it's probably not true.. You were in the wrong, clearly you did something to lead this guy on to the point of confessing his love for you. While you seem confident that you didn't 'technically' do anything wrong, I'm sure deep down you realize you're at fault here.