Dude, I can't say much I guess because I never had a real serious relationship, but let me ask you this. Does she feel your pain? Does she know what is best for you? Do you deserve the arguments plus the pain that you can't heal with weed because she's so worried about money? What is money if you can't be happy? Why even bother having it? I don't know about you man, but I'd go rip a joint up in front of her, blow it in her face, and tell her to fuck off. She obviously doesn't seem to care how much the medicine is helping you. We live alone and we die alone, pick a girl who can accept what you need. I agree with the post above though ^^ grow your own. Not only will it save money, (in the end), but it'll be a place you can get away from her. Or just ditch her and grow your own pot anyways. I'm all about compromises, but when health issues come into play, and she isn't allowing you to get what you need to help yourself, its time to sit down and think about what YOU need as a person to be happy.
She just needs to be educated. I would watch The Union with her. I know thats the stereotypical line, but it works.
Even after educating her on marijuana, educate her on your health issues. if she'll even listen I just don't get it, how can you let someone you love be in pain, and try to control when they relieve their pain. a few times a week... that's like her saying you can only take a pill a few times a week. it don't help shit but for a few hours of the day. wtf. Peoples lack of willingness to understand pisses me off. It really sounds like you're talking to a brick wall with her.
[quote name="alpo" post="19307404" timestamp="1389255609"]Hey Blade .. im 14yrs marital myself ... one thing they will never understand is regardless how long you 've been together .. your life will still be your own .. medical issues & pain shouldnt be a controversial issue in regards to lettin you smoke ... if she loves you she should be supportive on how you deal with your issues if shes not then thats her problem ... i say if she leaves you over that then let her azz go .. she'll be back ... the problem with wives is they think they can control your every move, mood, & everything else .. in which i love provin to mine all day that she don't control shit .. ive been doin the good, the bad & the ugly before i met her, during her and i'll still be doin shit after her ... $he know she can't change me ... $hit life is 2 $hort to let somebody come in to control you especially if they dont know what kind of stress we go through .. like Bitch Please ... its like i get why some men have side women, mistresses and girlfriends becuz havin a wife can blow at timez & itz alwayz the side pieces havin more compassion & understanding way better than the wife does ... ijs ... shit their usually the ones with support not trying to control & regulate .. like wtf?[/quote]Yes but the wife, husband or partner should be all that... Be Supportive compassionate loving, exciting fun..... EVERYTHING you had in the beginning of the relationship and then way more. Sadly many times this goes away and the person you choose to be with only picks apart at your differences and how it affects them and they forget about those things they used to do that made you happy and feel in sync with them. No one can live with a partner who doesn't give them their needs- Get into marriage therapy or do something/ create a plan to change the current situation... It's ok that it's not gonna change over night but slowly chisel away at this problem. You can't live with this. This is hurting you. Either she changes and starts respecting what bothers you or YOU change.,. Move fwd at getting away from her.
First off, thank you for your service. You are dealing with these issues as a result of fighting for our freedoms. I'm a married man of 5 years, two kids under the age of 5. I currently smoke about an eighth a week. I should smoke less for monetary reasons, but that isn't at topic. Just sharing all of this to validate my credibility. My honest opinion and I'm sorry for being blunt (no pun) - but I do not believe that your marriage will survive, regardless of whether or not you ever smoke again. I don't think your relationship issues are solved by simply giving up marijuana. I believe there are underlying issues that will continue to cause problems in your marriage. I would do anything for my wife. Including giving up marijuana. However, I have a good lady, and she would never ask that of me, because I've proven that I can be a good husband and father with or without it. I wish you the best, man.
She agrees with you that the pills aren't good for you and have serious long term effects, yet she still doesn't want you using the cannabis as medicine instead. She sounds like a bitch man..does she not know what pain is? I'm sure if she had constant pain she would be looking for some kind of relief..be it cannabis or something that's actually harmful. Edit: You are a wounded veteran..don't let a woman push you around telling you how you should live your life and how to treat your pain. You've been through much more than her, right? The way I see it, you have the right to use anything that works for you, even more so since you are a veteran. Your wife is a deranged psychopath if she would rather you be in pain for even a minute than to use the cannabis.
Thank you for your advice, everyone. I really appreciate your time and input. I would love to grow my own, brought it up a few times, she was more opposed than for it, "as long as i dont smoke more", she says. The medical mj program has just kicked off here in IL, but from what I gather, it's very limiting and I might not qualify, but I sure as hell will try. I'm used to being in pain and when I'm sober, I put on a brave face and focus on not letting it phase me, I'm mobile, I still crack jokes and do everything I normaly would, but inside I am focusing on suppressing the pain and not letting it show. Modern day psychology says that nobody can truly relate/understand you unless they have experienced it all through your eyes, and I would never wish that upon her, so pulling the veteran card doesn't work. To her, it's an addiction, not a solution.
Bro this sounds like the wrong relationship before the weed even came in... The weed is helping you through a struggle life has dealt you, your wife is only providing issues for you. I'd pick the weed, but really what I'd pick is a life away from her.
I see what you're saying, but at the same time, when you just step back and look at it, it's ridiculous for her to think like this... Marijuana isn't addictive, its just a habit, and for you a medicine. Its not like you're going to start acting like a crackhead and sell all your stuff lol... Smoking a cig is worse. The pills are worse. Alcohol is worse. Like come onnnn. I strongly think she needs to learn more about cannabis, IT IS A NATURAL PLANT, with sooo many different uses/benefits. Has she ever smoked?
[quote name="Bastardman" post="19309122" timestamp="1389290994"]Thank you for your advice, everyone. I really appreciate your time and input. I would love to grow my own, brought it up a few times, she was more opposed than for it, "as long as i dont smoke more", she says. The medical mj program has just kicked off here in IL, but from what I gather, it's very limiting and I might not qualify, but I sure as hell will try. I'm used to being in pain and when I'm sober, I put on a brave face and focus on not letting it phase me, I'm mobile, I still crack jokes and do everything I normaly would, but inside I am focusing on suppressing the pain and not letting it show. Modern day psychology says that nobody can truly relate/understand you unless they have experienced it all through your eyes, and I would never wish that upon her, so pulling the veteran card doesn't work. To her, it's an addiction, not a solution. [/quote]You're a very kind hearted person trying to do the right thing. Keep seeing YOUR therapist. If though the Bottling up your pain and sorrows gets too heavy at times, open up that stuff to some of the good HONEST people here. With that said ... be careful cautious who you open up to on GC watch out for the dishonest, mean, social media climbers. That's not me though at all. Far far from that.
Well, if you could grow your own, then you will have the option of making edibles and won't have to smoke as much ... win-win situation IMO...good luck!
Prior to reading I was thinking, damn you got a problem if you choose weed over your wife. After reading I'm thinking, damn your crazy if you stay with someone who wants you to be in pain...
She has tried it twice, both times went into Terri Schiavo mode...So she thinks that's how EVERYONE feels when they're on it...
Full disclosure, I came to this thread ready to side against you. However, it looks like she's constantly starting arguments and trying to change you. Furthermore, she wants you to med up. That's not really cool. I would have also suggested marriage counseling, but I have a feeling you might want to issue her an all tomato. Either she does marraige counseling or you two call it quitsville. Your other options are using edibles to disguise it, or putting oil into pills.
I even put the gif in there, so that I wouldn't have to explain the joke. . . . . https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADfK2ENghms
She'll never change. Cut your losses and try to live with the heartache. You'll get over it and have your herb too.
I haven't read the other advise yet but your wife is clearly not sympathetic to your injuries AT ALL. Is this someone who you want to spend the rest of your life with? Someone who's does not seem to properly comprehend that you're sick? Try reducing medication to someone who's in need of DAILY medication is just flat out offensive. Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum mobile app