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Bit of paranoia

Discussion in 'Apprentice Marijuana Consumption' started by Xili-, Aug 9, 2013.

  1. #1 Xili-, Aug 9, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 9, 2013
    Edit: Okay. Wow. I forgot to go back and finish my post title, lol.
     
    Hey guys.
     
    So last night I had my first solo session at home. Now, I don't know how to describe my personality well, but basically I plan everything out. Doesn't matter if I'm buying a video game or weed.
     
    I hadn't smoked in a few years before last night, and those time were all with friends. I remember my first time I came home high and my grandma, who lived with me at the time, told me my mom called at work. Not something my mom normally did, so my instant reaction was "She knows!". And on the phone with her I'm thinking she's going to hear it in my voice or smell it through the phone or something. The phone conversation was completely normal, and all was good. When I think back to that moment now, all of it is hilarious.
     
    Last night I had that crazy paranoia again, and I get that it's normal with 0 tolerance and being a new smoker, but oh my god.. As soon as the high hit me, I took all my rationality and pre-planning and just threw it out the window. I'm spilling water, throwing weed everywhere except on the little tray I had, losing stuff, putting my stuff away and taking it back out (this sentence just made me laugh.. I definitely forgot to "plan" for my stupidity). Did my mom just call my name? (She was sleeping) Is someone coming up the stairs? I heard footsteps for a good thirty minutes and I just had to turn it into background noise (this actually worked). But these are technically things that could actually happen. It felt like 10 days, but eventually it went away (especially when I knew the smell had dissipated) and I listened to amazing music, hopped on my Xbox, played online with some friends, ate some GREAT food, and had a nice sleep.
     
    The hardest thing to cope with was that these situations could technically happen. But who knows, maybe if I was totally by myself I'd be worrying about a fire in the kitchen, (which could also technically happen, right?) or something else that seems silly sober.
     
    I also know the best way to hide weed from your parents is to just not do it. :) Before smoking, I also thought about that risk or variable. But my mom is really chill, we're like best friends. I rarely do anything bad or lie. She doesn't get in my business or snoop, and the last thing she would do is enter my messy room. My older sister smokes weed and my mom is okay with it, but as the good child, its still not something I want to talk about.. yet. I feel like besides a bit of shock or worry, there wouldn't be any negative consequences. I'm the legal smoking/drinking age and I can make my own decisions. This reasoning made me decide it was okay to go through with.
     
    Sorry for the long post, I just want to talk about it and maybe get some advice about my next trip and how to make it better (even though I understand the paranoia goes away with time). Even stories or similar experiences would be appreciated, I'd love a good laugh. I had a great time last night regardless but that part was a bit tough. I actually found a method to store my stuff quicker which raises my comfort and I have Ozium coming in the mail which I think will also make me feel a lot better (but honestly.. when high, I'm probably not going to know when to spray it, lol).
     
    Thanks. :)

     
  2. Ya man that's perfectly normal. Just takes some practice of getting over it while you're high. If you just rationalize things to yourself and figure out if you're paranoid for a real reason or if you're just high. After a few times toking and nothing bad happening and you learning to calm yourself it will fade.
     
  3.  
    Thanks a lot, good to hear. :)
     
  4. Oh wow, long post :p. It's normal, you'll get past it the more you smoke. Soon you will just ignore everything and will be able to chill. I remember freaking out like you, sometimes thinking I heard my parents talking while I was tokin in the bathroom even though they were asleep. ALL IN YOUR HEAD.
     
  5.  
    Yeah, I know (sorry)! But I really appreciate the reassurance. :) How long did it take you to relax, do you remember?
     

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