Well, I'll start by saying that you shouldn't burn yourself or drink cough syrup, that's not a healthy way to deal with your stress. Secondly, just give it some time. You'll figure out where you are in life and what you need, but you need to sort through all of the thoughts in your head. But you should probably get it out of your mind that he completed you. You need to find your own happiness, not rely on someone else to supply it for you. Find a hobby, exercise, do volunteer work or find something else fulfilling to do.
What i did to my parents, when i gave my ex shit about something when i shouldn't, called my cousin's dad an alcoholic because i was drunk and off my meds. Same thing happened with my ex but i was the guy who got cheated on. We knew it wouldn't work after she cheated but we worked for 4 months trying to make it work but it wasn't clicking. We were together 5 years i invested everything i had into her and she fucked me. The only advice i can give is don't beat yourself up, you're young and these experiences are lessons well learned. Don't let the good that you can learn out of this slip away try and make the best of it and never do it again. People learn the hard way most of the time. it's not the end of the world and you will find another. You can't beat yourself up over and over over something that is already said and done. I know you feel obligated to feel bad so you can atone for it but that won't do anythinng but hurt you. You need to work through it and move on
I actually just read all that and my eyes started to water lol. It seems like you really loved the guy, but you did screw up...in all honesty, he deserves to bring up the cheating in your guys arguments. BUT, don't cut yourself, don't drink cough syrup, in other words, don't be a weak dumbass... Others have gone through a lot more than you have, and they don't cause self harm to themselves, no, they get over it, move on, and see what else life will bring them. You weren't given life to waste it on one man, he obviously wasn't your true love, so move on and keep searching until you find your TRUE love. If he is your true love, then who knows, maybe you guys will meet up again in the future, try it again, and start your own family and even get married in the future. and you won't cheat on him next time. But you won't ever get that chance if your going to sit around trying to kill yourself over it. What the fuck is that going to do? Just be smart and live your goddamn life and stop drinking cough syrup..
I've been dealing with depression for quite some time now, but that's no excuse either, its just I can't distract myself long enough.. I workout already but that's a tiny fraction of my day.. I didn't burn this time, unfortunately I did drink some cs. Letting go of the thought that he was the one is tough, as its unreal we finally got to the point where we couldn't do it again.. I just don't know what to do with my life, we consumed so much of each others days, and looking back that wasn't a very good idea
Look you need to stop thinking in short term and look long term. Set some long term goals that would make you feel accomplished. In the mean time do things you enjoy or find a new hobby or activity. Meet some new people. Start bettering yourself i promise you'll feel better. For me when i do things to improve myself i just think how bad it sucks for my ex that she won't have me when i'm at my best.
Thank you, that's exactly what I should do, seems a little selfish, but I've been told that's necessary sometimes
A lot of people will consume your days, TRUST ME. I went out with this one broad who I loved so very much, and even when she ran me over 4 different times with her car, I still stayed with her. Even when I almost killed her by choking her to death for making fun of my dead mother, I still stayed with her(and let her live). But after awhile, we broke up, so many years I spent on her, so much of my life, but after a little bit, I looked at myself and said "Hey, there is that chick across the street" so I forgot about the whole thing, and that chick and I actually went out for a few weeks before she cheated on me with my cousin... Life fucking sucks, okay? Love can suck, love can hurt you and it can make you happy. You can't tell love what to do. If love wants to suck up years of your life and then leave you with nothing, then love will do that, and you won't do a damn thing about it. But then you gotta get up and realize, that love doesn't control your life, you do, and when love is ready to be good to you, and when love is ready to make you happy, then love will find you again, and treat you right, and make you happy. Until then, live your life, and like I said, see what life gives you. Life could give a lot of good things in your future, maybe even your dream man, who happens to be the nicest, sweetest guy you ever met, and you start a family of 3 kids who you love to death, but you won't EVER be able to experience that unless you let life give you what you truly deserve. You cheated on him, this is loves way of saying, "Well, maybe you guys aren't meant to be together, so i'm going to break this thing up", well fuck it, ha. You did something bad to him, he did something bad to you(breaking up, if that counts), who cares? It happens, let life guide you, and let love find you. If you destroy life now, your life, then love will NEVER find you, and you will die alone. Doesn't that seem worse? Anyways, how old are you? Maybe you can get your girlfriends to take you out sometime and meet some other guys, who knows.
Really helpful man, thing is I was/still am a quite unsocial butterfly. Not much friends to go out with, most of them are goody-good girls.. I've always been some outcast, a misfit, but when I found him nothing of that sort mattered because I felt I didn't need anyone else.. oh and I'm 19.
Well you just have to start hanging with that type of crowd. If you live somewhere where theres carnivals, or festivals, or live bands that play, then go to those events, I have met a lot of badass, bomb people at concerts. Plus, you'll most likely score a lot of bud from a concert, whether it's free or not is up to who you meet at the concert. Like the above said, just find new hobbies. things to keep you occupied, if you don't have a job, get one at a sociable place, get a job at a place where theres other girls and guys your age who work there, and then there ya go, you'll be getting paid for working AND meeting new people. You'll be working and earning money so much that you'll forget the whole relationship. Maybe not forget, but it will enter the deepest part of your mind where it will be confined and you'll be able to not worry about it as much. Plus, work is the best way to find connects. Get a job, meet a dealer who probably works there too, and every pay check, bam, buy some smoke, relax, chill out, life will be okay, watch a movie, lol. Who knows, maybe the next drug dealer you meet will be a guy and you will start getting to know him? One thing leads to another, and you know where i'm going with this. Just gotta kick love in the fucking face and tell it to get off your back, this is your life, control it, live it, and make good use of it because for all we know, this will be the only life you get. Or I should say the only GIFT you will ever get, so cherish it. Like I said in another post, i've been knocked down plenty of times, but I keep thinking to myself how great my life will be when I get up, and go do the things I really want to do, like go to other countries and meet other people, and hell, maybe even move to another country(Maybe the UK? Not sure yet, I do like british accents on girls), maybe you need to do the same, maybe your true love is out there, in the world, and not here in this confined area known as america.
If anything I'm just tired of having to start over and over. Trial and error wastes A LOT of time.. hurts like hell to give up on something so amazing. Ill follow the advice anyways
Well, just take this last piece of advice. You're only 19, i'm only 21, were going to make a lot of trials and errors. If someone doesn't make any trials or errors in their life, it's because they have learned nothing, and have probably sat their ass on the couch their whole life and never tried to live. Like they say, wisdom comes with age, and you can't learn, if you never have anything to learn from, and mistakes are the number 1 thing everyone has to learn from and get better at next time. I predict a lot of bad things to happen to me in the future. My family dying off before I do, or maybe i'll fall in love and my partner will get cancer. I am ready for those things, because life is alot of things, but easy ain't one of them. But I won't ever kill myself over it. I will join the dead when I am ready, but right now? I want to stay with the living. We all think death is the easy way out, but the truth is, we don't know what death has in store for us, it could be ten times worse than anything we could think of, we don't actually know. It could be nothingness whatever that is, so live the life you have while you got it, like one of my favorite quotes from scarface: "Everyday above ground, is a good day."
I read the first half I can tell you the problem was that you cheated on him right away... yeah you got back together but that will always linger NO MATTER WHAT.. by the way I read how the relationship was I can tell you aren't that old at all and the way you want to hurt yourself.. You are very young, don't hurt yourself over something so stupid, there are plenty of other people out there that you will fall in love with. I would write more but I am tired I have a lot more advice but it's getting past 3am.
Eh I cheated on my gf a year and a half ago and she cheated on me a few months after I did. We worked it out and are still very in love and doing great.
I stopped reading after you said you cheated. Unacceptable. I don't even have to read the rest to know you have self image issues or attachment issues, or whatever the story is. If you wanna fuck someone else be an adult and break up with your S/O first. If you wanna have an open relationship and they agree that's totally fine, but cheating is a no no. Go to therapy and stop being so self destructive.