I need fucking help..

Hey everybody, I am fairly drunk and high right now but I will try to explain to you what I am feeling as much as possible. So for the past 5 or so years, I have been anxious as hell, and often this anxiety has led to depression. Usually it would be one or the other, I would either be anxious, or depressed. But for the past month, I have been both, and life is getting harder and harder to live everyday. What the fuck do i do? Alcohol doesn't help my anxiety, it only makes it worse. Weed helps it, but only when I;m high.. When the high wears off, I am extremely depressed. When I'm sober, the anxiety and depression are more manageable, but its a constant dreadful feeling that eventaully escalates to either a panic attack or suicidal depression. But there is also times where I am actually happy, but then the anxiety kicks in. For those of you who have never had anxiety (Im not talking about once in a while, I am talking about every second of your life,) you will know that it is a horrible feeling and you feel like everything you are doing is wrong. Its like a constant battle in your head. But yeah, when I'm happy and not anxious, all of the sudden I work myself up over absolutely nothing, and become extremely anxious. You can't just say "Just don't work yourself up bro," it doesnt work like that, its all on an almost subconscious level. Sometimes i;m able to tap into my subconcous and fix my anxiety, but your subconcious can not remain lucid for too long.
I am doing everything I can to fix my problems, but I just need some fucking advice please help me. I am also looking into mindfulness, which has some promise, but like all things, the non anxious feeling never lasts.

Note: The anxiety is what causes the depression, so anxiety gone = depression gone.

Edited by Justin127, 03 June 2012 - 05:03 AM.

Eat fresh fruits and vegetables, clean your room, exercise, meditate, get outside...depression cured

im not sure if we can help you out on that one. your should see a therapist.

in the meantime just stand with confidence and think thats its all in ur head and you will be ok, just do stuff that makes your happy

Eat fresh fruits and vegetables, clean your room, exercise, meditate, get outside...depression cured

Good idea, I need to start doing these thigns, physically my lifes been a wreck as well as mentally, and I guess those things have some type of relation lol. I will start working out and eating healty and get organized


BUT, I need some advice on meditation, I am not experienced at all in it and I have absolutely no idea what to do. Can you give me some advice on that?

Give up booze and start making edibles in addition to smoke.

Start a journal and don't hold anything back. It doesn't need to be a novel, hell, it doesn't even need to make sense. Talk about your day and how you felt during certain times. Could you have avoided anxiety by handling things differently?

PM me if you need someone to talk to. I'm sailing the same sea, brother.

I think you need to take some time off the mind altering substances, (alcohol/weed) to sober up and think more clearly about the situation you're in. I know for myself, times when I have struggled with anxiety and depression, weed just tended to serve as an escape to these issues instead of a sustainable solution. You need to face and confront whatever problems you're having, and having mental clarity and a sober mind definitely helps, although I know it is hard given your current emotional state of being. If anything, definitely get some exercise (running works wonders), mediate, and just try to enjoy yourself. You'll see through it, keep your head up!

Give up booze and start making edibles in addition to smoke.

Start a journal and don't hold anything back. It doesn't need to be a novel, hell, it doesn't even need to make sense. Talk about your day and how you felt during certain times. Could you have avoided anxiety by handling things differently?

PM me if you need someone to talk to. I'm sailing the same sea, brother.

Alright man I'll definitely hit you up if I need someone to talk to. This is why I love the internet

I cannot emphasize how beneficial it is to take some time of weed, cause if you're dealing with depression, and find yourself in a situation that isn't conducive to happiness, it will more often than not make things worse and exacerbate any psychological issues you're struggling with. Taking a week or two off can do wonders, and I PROMISE you will feel better.

I think you need to take some time off the mind altering substances, (alcohol/weed) to sober up and think more clearly about the situation you're in. I know for myself, times when I have struggled with anxiety and depression, weed just tended to serve as an escape to these issues instead of a sustainable solution. You need to face and confront whatever problems you're having, and having mental clarity and a sober mind definitely helps, although I know it is hard given your current emotional state of being. If anything, definitely get some exercise (running works wonders), mediate, and just try to enjoy yourself. You'll see through it, keep your head up!

Thanks man, its just that, like you said, the current emotional state of being blocks everything, and I even think I'm a little crazy just because it's impossible for me to see reality clearly... I will start wokring out and meditating though. Can you give me some meditation tips?
As for the mind altering substances, I think your right. I need to lay off weed and alcohol. Mainly weed though..l
As good as weed is, it is not right for people who are mentally hurt...

Honestly I've felt just like you have, and the only way to get rid of it is to be productive. I'm actually working on taking my ass back to college to become an accountant. I have every reason to be depressed and anxious too, my girlfriend and I just had a baby about a month ago, I just lost my job a few days ago, were barely making ends meet.

Am I depressed about this shit? Am I anxious about our situation? Fuck yeah I am, but I'm not going to let some silly shit like depression control my life, I'm taking control. In a few years I'll have a nice ass job, a nice ass house, a nice ass car, smoking some of the best weed in my whole entire life that I grew.

Focus on the positive things, make some goals, and strike fucking gold.

I cannot emphasize how beneficial it is to take some time of weed, cause if you're dealing with depression, and find yourself in a situation that isn't conducive to happiness, it will more often than not make things worse and exacerbate any psychological issues you're struggling with. Taking a week or two off can do wonders, and I PROMISE you will feel better.

Your right...


I'll be honest, its just a crutch for me.

I cannot emphasize how beneficial it is to take some time of weed, cause if you're dealing with depression, and find yourself in a situation that isn't conducive to happiness, it will more often than not make things worse and exacerbate any psychological issues you're struggling with. Taking a week or two off can do wonders, and I PROMISE you will feel better.

And it also does bring out all the issues I have, which I think I am depressed and ancious right now. The weed and alcohol expose the anxiety ans show how shitty it has made my life, and therefore caused depression

Great; then you know what you gotta do, it's all up to you to DO IT! Good Luck brother, trust me I understand the situation you're dealing with and in hindsight, if I heeded my own advice, life would have been a lot more easier for me a couple months back when I was in the dumps, smoking almost any chance I could get to escape the reality I created for myself. Sobriety actually feels good when your mind is cloudy, and you will love yourself for taking the initiative to make things right.

Honestly I've felt just like you have, and the only way to get rid of it is to be productive. I'm actually working on taking my ass back to college to become an accountant. I have every reason to be depressed and anxious too, my girlfriend and I just had a baby about a month ago, I just lost my job a few days ago, were barely making ends meet.

Am I depressed about this shit? Am I anxious about our situation? Fuck yeah I am, but I'm not going to let some silly shit like depression control my life, I'm taking control. In a few years I'll have a nice ass job, a nice ass house, a nice ass car, smoking some of the best weed in my whole entire life that I grew.

Focus on the positive things, make some goals, and strike fucking gold.

I will definitely try to do that man, thanks for this advice. All this fucking amazing advice from you guys will definitely be a big help to me sometime in the future when things aren't going so great.

Right now though, I feel pretty good. Explaning my problems for the first time to other people feels fucking amazing!

getting laid really helps too. I don't know if you have a girlfriend or anything, but seriously it helps. It gets you motivated and happy and confident. all the good things.

Good idea, I need to start doing these thigns, physically my lifes been a wreck as well as mentally, and I guess those things have some type of relation lol. I will start working out and eating healty and get organized


BUT, I need some advice on meditation, I am not experienced at all in it and I have absolutely no idea what to do. Can you give me some advice on that?

"Meditation is not something you can do, you can become meditative, you can become meditation, but you can never do meditation..it is a certain quality. If you cultivate your mind , emotion, and energy to a certain level of awareness meditation will blossom within you. Meditation is not going somewhere, it is a homecoming"

I'd recommend sitting, closing your eyes , and being free of thought. each thought, just let it pass , until you come to nothing but being. if you get in tune with it, and the moment, you will just be blissful by nature. takes some practice , but can provide an enhanced perspective and consciousness

getting laid really helps too. I don't know if you have a girlfriend or anything, but seriously it helps. It gets you motivated and happy and confident. all the good things.

Hah I wish I could, but I haven;t gotten with a girl in a while, and my confidence is at a extreme low...

"Meditation is not something you can do, you can become meditative, you can become meditation, but you can never do meditation..it is a certain quality. If you cultivate your mind , emotion, and energy to a certain level of awareness meditation will blossom within you. Meditation is not going somewhere, it is a homecoming"

I'd recommend sitting, closing your eyes , and being free of thought. each thought, just let it pass , until you come to nothing but being. if you get in tune with it, and the moment, you will just be blissful by nature. takes some practice , but can provide an enhanced perspective and consciousness

Alright cool man, I acutally get what you are saying. I will start practicing this as soon as possible. I am also now more dedicated to living a much healthier lifestyle. I just hope that this dedication lasts...

Check out:
Omega 3
Magnesium
5 HTP

All three of these are available in the vitamin section in grocery stores. I take omega 3 daily, and a 5 htp 2-3 times a day. Magnesium just gave me very solid poo. But different things work for different people.

The 5 htp makes me always happy, no anxiety. The depression is going away. My highs have been better, and lately the laughing kind instead of a deep quiet depression kind.

It helps me from getting into my head, and my negative inner monologue is going away. My confidence and sex drive also seemed to boost up. It's also helping me eat better and exercise more. People say to exercise to cure depression, it's such a hard thing to do when depressed. Same with diets plans.

To me it sounds like you might be drinking to much. I have had clinical depression and anxiety since the 7th grade. Weed helps when high and for a little while after I come down (but not more than an hour or so). Although there is a certain 'type' of depression I get in to at times and even today I had this experience where all I wanted to do was reach for some alcohol and be absent for the rest of the day. But I'm not 21 so I didn't have any alcohol, but the important thing is that while thinking about how I wanted to drink and how depressed I was, I realized that if I really WAS 21 I would probably be drinking every time I felt depressed and quickly I can see it turning into a dangerous spiral for me. I like alcohol... so did my dad... addiction is in the family and I realize its my job to not let myself fall down that road. Sure I can drink when I am depressed or when I want to party but I can't RELY on it or think 'don't worry if your sad you can just go drink'. That's not a road I suggest for anyone... Just smoke weed and try and find something new in life. People, activities, places? Anything.