Excuses not to take a drug test

Discussion in 'General' started by boredsmoke, Mar 24, 2012.

  1. #1 boredsmoke, Mar 24, 2012
    I wanted to know if there were any excuses I can use to get out of taking a drug test: religious, social, etc.

    Also, would it work if I was just honest?


    I'm going for more low level jobs or an internship.


    I would prefer not to invest in a fake test kit, or take a month break or do a cleanse that is probably bad for my system.
     
  2. #2 Pass the dr0, Mar 24, 2012
    My dick got blown off in 'nam and now I can only shit.

    Idk
     
  3. #3 Mr Unknown, Mar 24, 2012
    Detox drink or pills could work.

    Fuck if I was going to take a drug test and knew i was going to fail, id just tell em,

    "Look, not even bother giving me one, im going to fail and show positive for THC."

    Not much you can do.
     
  4. #4 BlazeLE, Mar 24, 2012

    fuck that take the test and make them waste their money. im to the point where i just want to apply everywhere just to make them waste money on a drug test. fuck them.
     
  5. #5 Stealf, Mar 24, 2012
    I'm pissing blood.
     
  6. #6 pigpen03, Mar 24, 2012
    i have aids.

    you wont want to handle my fluids
     
  7. #7 DriftingApart, Mar 24, 2012
    "My lord considers it a sin for his children to consent to drug tests, therefore I'm not agreeing because I don't want to go to hell."
     
  8. #8 Blamazing, Mar 24, 2012
    My pee is part of a secret society
     
  9. #9 boredsmoke, Mar 25, 2012
    I think I'm gonna go with

    A. I piss blood

    or

    B. My piss is part of a secret society ritual and sacred to my followers


    War is a good excuse but I'm too young, and you still gotta piss even without a dick

    And the religion thing might not fly because if it is religious they may want proof

    Aids, they wear rubber gloves. also I don't think you can get aids from piss only jizz and Im not jizzing at a drug test center.

    I'll try to think of some backups though I honestly don't think I can say the top 2 with a complete straight face...maybe the blood one. I wonder if this will work
     
  10. #10 Klauck, Mar 25, 2012
    say you cant take a piss
     
  11. #11 Parable, Mar 25, 2012
    My dick doesnt work right. Maybe I shouldn't have hired that craiglist escort.
     
  12. #12 actionthaxton, Mar 25, 2012
    I go with invasion of privacy.
     
  13. #13 OpenMindFields, Mar 25, 2012
    I thinks we's being trolleduh.
     
  14. #14 Chrismittty, Mar 25, 2012
    I think making excuses would be pretty closely related to doing drugs/ failing in your testers head...maybe?
     
  15. #15 JakeTheDuck, Mar 25, 2012
    Say that you're the first robot to perfectly simulate human life... except that you can't pee because of your lack of actual organs. But because you have no human organs, it is also, unfortunately, impossible for you to get high.
     
  16. #16 TheDankDude, Mar 25, 2012
    Tell them you forgot to study
     
  17. #17 OpenMindFields, Mar 25, 2012
    Just jerk off and pretend it's all good.
     
  18. #18 pulses, Mar 25, 2012

    I'd just like to say this is a really good idea.
     
  19. #19 Relentless, Mar 25, 2012
    Just admit you do unmentionable, then that will throw everyone so off guard. Break-down and tell them you smoke it yadayada. That way, they wont make you take the drug test right now, bcuzz your just like Yaaa Im addicted but ready 2 get clean. You could even smoke weed, all the while if you play the cards right??
     

Share This Page